The Michigan Daily - Weekend etc. - Thursday, March 16, 1995 *ILMS OPENING: THURSDAY T H U R S DA Y T H U R S D A Y MAN OF mo IuPomAew No, not a bio-pic about the guy who was out "walking bis dog" and just happened to catch sight of OJ, but an alleged "off-beat love $tory" with Albert Finney. Yeah, it'd have to be pretty off-beat to feature Albert Daddy Warbucks" Finney in a luv scene. Youch! At Ann Arbor 1 & 2: 12:00, V50, 3:40, 5:30, 7:30, 9:30. BYE BYE Love Bye Bye marketing company. Who thought of this title? And ermore, who thought that anyone would want to see Paul Reiser, Matthew vtodine and Randy Quaid sit on their liver-spotted behinds, complaining about not being able to get laid? At Briarwood: 1:15, 4:00, 7:00, 9:30. At Showcase: 12:40, ;50, 5:10, 7:25, 9:40, 11:50. tANDYuAN: FAREwE. To THE FLaN Leprosy: It sucks, but you gotta teach the kids %metime. At Showcase: 12:20, 2:45, 5:00, 7:15, 7:45, 9:30, 10:10, 11:40, 12:20. jsING IsAIAH Halle Berry and Jessica Lange team up to fight a custody battle over sdme rug rat. Whoop de doo. At Briarwood: 1:00, 3:45, 7:20, 10:00. At Showcase: 12:15, 2:30, 4:40, 7:30, 9:45, 11:40. TRAWBERRY Aim CiwocoLre Acclaimed foreign ice-cream film. At State: 4:30, 00, 9:00. TaL TALES The interactive, Jake Baker movie has finally arrived. Sneak Preview at Showcase: (Sat): 1:00, 7:30, (sun) 1, 2:30, w/ "Man of the House." F1I L M S H 0 L D I N G: BILLY MADwISN Hear Adam "Canteen Boy" Sandler ask the immortal question, "Want to touch the heinie?" At Briarwood: 4:30, 9:40. Wo9 s ON THE Smt The shocking, true story of the man behind the morals: Rush Limbaugh uncovered at last. To be showed as a double bill with "John Wayne Bobbit: Electric Boogaloo." At Briarwood: 1:50, 6:50. THE BRADY BUNCH Updated version of TV classic features a vanilla extract swigging Greg, a professional interpretive dancer, (a.k.a. homeless) Peter, a Karaoking Marcia, a Students Party member Jan, a balding Cindy and an e-mailing Bobby, who goes by the name "Jake Baker." At Briarwood: 12:45, 3:00, 5:10, 7:15, 9;20. At Showcase: 12:00, 2:10, 4:15, 7:15, 9:25, 11:30. HAVwwEwews This musical comedy adventure about multi-cultural fat kids at a ulti-cultural fat camp is sure to enlighten the insensitive, multi-cultural viewer. With Marlon Brando, Dom and Peter DeLuise and Your mama as "The Tempt- ress." At Showcase: 12:25, 2:35, 4:45. NIDAWAY Oliver Stone and co. team up to bring us this controversial flip side of the O.J. saga with man on the scene reports from the Mangler, Count Chocula and Beeker from "The Muppet Show," who, amazingly enough, managed to slip into the back of the Ford Bronco when no one but Ollie was looking. Did we mention a grassy knoll? At Briarwood: 9:50. At Showcase: 12:00, 2:35, 5:00, 7:35, 10:00, 12:25. JUST CAuS No, there was no just cause for making this film. Sean Connery is just too damn old and leathery. At Briarwood: 1:30, 4:15, 7:30. At Showcase: 12:30, q:00, 5:20, 7:45, 10:10, 12:20. LEGENDs OF THE FAU. Brad "The Greasiest Man Alive" Pitt's nose hair! At 19iarwood: 3:50, 9:10. TiE MADNESS oF Kmn G es Finally, the Bush bio-pic we've all been praying for. At Ann Arbor 1 & 2: 12:15, 2:30, 4:45, 7:05, 9:15. MAN of THE House In a desperate attempt to latch onto the celebrity port-o-potty on which his ample-and-growing behind no longer resides, Chevy "I will not work with Michael Caine" Chase and some blond twirp bring us the first Kato "Huh. Huh. Dirty e-mail is cool." Kalin bio-pic. At Showcase: 12:05, 2:20, 4:35, 7:20, 9:35, 11:50. NoBODY's FooL Jessica Tandy, Paul Newman and Kato play bridge, tell war stories, and show off pictures of their multi-cultural grandkids (all while calling the psychic hotline). First 50 viewers get free enemas. At Briarwood: 1:20, 6:40. At Showcase: 12:00, 2:25, 4:50, 7:15, 9:40, 12:10. Oumnmam Rainman, Lightning Jack and the Swedish Chef all break into the White House, hoping to find Oprah. Watch sparks fly when they catch Bill on one of his late night munchie runs. At Briarwood: 12:30, 3:30, 7:05, 9:45. At Showcase: 12:30, 1:30, 3:30, 4:30, 7:10, 7:40, 9:55, 10:30, 12:30. Putp Ficom Awwwwww, Yeah, Boy! At State: 1:30, 4:30, 8:00, 11:00. At *howcase: 1:00, 4:00, 7:20, 10:20. RooMMATES Brad "The Sexiest Man Alive" Pitt and Brian "Kato" Kalin are evil twin houseguests who eat peanut butter from the jar, leave the seat up, and get really, really stoned right before they're about to testify at murder trials. At Showcase: 12:10, 2:30, 4:50, 7:25, 9:45, 12:00. SHA.ow GRAVE Insert an O.J. reference here. Oh, come on, that's the first thing that you thought of too. At Ann Arbor 1 & 2: (Th) 5:30, 7:30, 9:35. .SECOND RUN Fius: DIscLOsum At Fox: 2:00, 4:30, 7:15, 9:55. THE NExT KARATE Km At Fox: 12:00 - Free for kids. FoRREsT GuMP At Fox: 1:00, 4:10, 7:00, 10:00. THE JUNGE BooK At Fox: 12:15, 2:30,4:50,7:30,9:45. NELL At Fox: 7:20, 9:40. RICHm RiCH At Fox: 12:30,2:45,5:00. Tm. SHAWSHANK Rusuurnow At State: 1:30, 11:00. At Showcase: 1:00, 4:00, 7:00, :4, 12:30. Phone numbers: Ann Arbor 1 & 2: 761-9700; Briarwood: 769-8783; Fox Village: 994-8080; Michigan: 668-8480; Showcase: 973-8380; State: 994-4024. All late-night shows are Friday and Saturday only. Matinee shows at Ann Arbor 1 & 2 on Saturday, Sunday and Tuesday only. Matinee shows at Fox Village on Saturday and Sunday only. WOm N & D0 ERENCES Fw Sums Three short films about marriage, female psychology and lesbian relationships around the globe. 1300 Chem 7:00. Free. 33Rm Am ARmo. Fum FESTIVAL Independent and experimental 16 mm films from all over the world are showcased in the annual presentation which lasts through Sunday. Mich 7:00, 9:30 & 11:00. F RI1DAY 33D Am. Ammo. F. ESTVAL Awards jury member Midi Onodera presents a free sneak preview at 3:00 of her first feature, "Skin Deep," a drama about relationships and sexuality. The festival continues at night. Mich 7:00 & 9:00. SATURDAY 33RD An Amm o Fu FrnvAL See Thursday. Mich 1:00, 7:00 & 9:30. SUNDAY 33rm AmN AR FmmF. Fusna.t The awarded films are presented at three separate shows. Mich 5:00, 7:00 & 9:00. MONDAY Din. M o Mum=.. (1954) Actually, I've come to the startling realization that murder and the O.J. Simpson trial are no longer funny. Oh how I miss the time when murder was funny. Really, for all you who do not know, this is a Hitchcock movie. Mich 7:00. QuEEN MARmOr (1994) French film about the wedding of Marguerite of Valois and Henri of Navarre that was arranged in a time of peace between Catholics and Huguenots, but eventu- ally led to the Saint Bartholomew Day's Massacre. This will be on the Western European History final, so take notes. Look out for Colin "I was framed!" Ferguson playing the assassin. Mich 9:30. TUESDAY CINEMA i IN= A F... SEmEs Featured film is "Sati" about a mute Brahman girl who is unable to marry because her horoscope predicts early widowhood. Nat Sci 7:00. Free. THE LAst STOP (1948) Polish film based on accounts of life in Auschwitz as seen through the eyes of two women. Mich 7:00. THE ADVEmUmES OF PmemCLA, QUEEN of Tw DEsERT (1994) Watch Terence Stamp (that's right, the guy who played General Zod in "Superman II") frolic. around in drag with Gene Hackman and Christopher Reeve. See sparks fly when the three argue over who gets to play Lois Lane. Mich 9:15. Qume MA RoT (1994) See Monday. Mich 9:30. WEDNESDAY DRuisrom Cowsoy (1989) Matt Dillon and Kelly Lynch are naughty, naughty, naughty in Gus Van Sant's controversial film. Mich 7:00. OASI Manchester's rock 'n' roll stars bring it on down at St. Andrew's Hall. Unfortunately, the show is sold out. Bum RODEo with Dead Hot Workshop at the Majestic. Doors open at 8 p.m. and tickets areavailable at all Ticketmaster locations, or by phone: 810-645-6666. Bomuc L is Boston folk-singer plays the Ark at Eight. Tickets are $8.75 at the door. D.T.'s with the Melting Hopefuls. From East Lansing and New York, respectively. At the Blind Pig. SARAH McLACKLAN Canadian. Appearing at Hill Auditorium with Paula Cole at 7:30 p.m. Tickets range from $20.50 to $27.50. Available at the Union Ticket Office. NICK STRANGE &THE BARvNAKEDS A bit o' blues, a bit o' reggae. At the Tap Room. Bor FLY at Rick's. LA TmNmr Reggae at Cross Street ISAAC SmN wIrH THE DETROIT y o w Omr OF SRmA One of the foremost violinists of the century will perform pieces by Nielsen, Beethoven, Mozart and Shostakovich. Tickets cost $15-$50 and the show begins at 8 p.m. Call (313) 833- 3700 for more information. FRIDAY MACEO PARKER AND Rom REvirsni With James Brown and P-Funk credentials, one of the most prominent funk saxophonists of the last four decades plays the Power Center. Blue Dog jazzers open. Tickets for the 8 p.m. show are $17.50 or $12.75 for students, available in advance from the Union Ticket Office or by calling 763-TKTS. ST. PATRICK's DAY BLOwOUT FEATuRa LONNE BROoKs Bluesy Brooks hits the stage at Rick's at 10 p.m., following three hours of funk by the Bucket from 5-8 p.m., and covers by Brother Rabbit from 2-5 p.m. Admission is two bucks until eight, when it sky-rockets up to five. FRANK AWusN & THE ODD Sox Local legends play the Blind Pig. LADY SUNSmNE & THE X BAND To attempt genre classification would be an exercise in futility. Playing the Heidelberg at 8 p.m. THE IMPATIEnIs You know the story: Irresistable hooks, infectious melodies. At Cava Java. Wi Industrial-strength rock that will blow your damn hairpiece off. At Cross Street. GeoRw. BEDARD & THE Knew.. Rockabilly! At the Tap Room in Ypsilanti. JEnsoN Cmw with Day #28 and Sick, this band's tunes are as swampy and foreboding as the South Carolina swamp they crawled out of. At the Greer..oom, 'round 8:45 p.m. RFD BoYs The Ark. Showtime is 8 p.m. and tickets are $8.75 at the door. ISAAC STERN wrH Tu DEuR YmSPwov OCi sowA See Thursday. THE GENuMEN New male a capella group makes their first "major" appearance at the Union U-Club. 7 p.m. Tickets cost $5 for what is surely a historic event. BERLI PH umuomc WOoDWND QuNT Makes its Ann Arbor debut in a some- what more historical event. Tickets cost$14-$26, and student rush tickets will be available for $8 the day of the performance. Rackham Auditorium at 8 p.m. Call 764-2538 for more information. SATURDAY JoN CAF Set-list spans life career, from the Velvet Underground through Songs for Drella. The Soldier String Quartet featuring El Cole opens two shows at 7th House- one at 8 p.m., one at 10:30 p.m. Tickets are available at all Ticketmaster outlets, or by calling 810-645-6666. Curca Noisy band plays St. Andrew's Hall with Pittbull and Next Step Up. Tickets for the 7:30 p.m., all-ages show are eight bucks in advance, at all Ticketmaster locations, or by calling 810-645-6666. BETTY Comedy-Harmony fusion at the Ark. Shows at 7:30 and 10 p.m. Tickets are $15 in advance, at Schoolkids' or by calling 763-8587. HoLY Cows From Chelsea, with ex-Hannibals outfit 19 Wheels opening. At the Blind Pig. NiE umT Ziggy Marley meets Harry Belafonte. At Rick's. THE Pmooeuis return to Ann Arbor, having spent their father's fortune on wine, gambling and prostitutes. Welcome them with a feast at the Heidelberg. FiwN.. Ex-Maytricks members play semi-acoustic set at Cava Java. THE BUCKET Funk at Cross Street. KNEE DEEPS HAG A decent funk band from Kalamazoo. East Lansing's Sweet Daddy opens. At Theo's. INDIE RocK GRAs BaG Loomer, Underminded, Melk and Red Thread all play the Green Room, beginning at 8:45 p.m. GRoovE Dos at the Tap Room. THE BRANEBURG CocEm: PART I The Museum Chamber Strings perform Bach's concerti 4-6 at the Museum of Art. Student tickets cost $7 and $15 for all others. Call 764-0395 for more information. ISAAC STERN wm THE moror SyB wo OcsmA See Thursday. 8:30 p.m. Howo'M, XAo, vIOLN AND Aumem GmREN, PwAo This free performance at the School of Music Recital Hall will include sonatas by Hummel, Adler, Brahms and Hindemith. 5 p.m. SUNDAY THE BRANDENBu Comcrn PART I See Saturday. 4:30 p.m. M O N D A Y D s'm cool English chanteuse performs at Industry at 8 p.m. Tickets are available at all Ticketmaster locations or by phoning 810-645-6666. 18 and over, only, please. WAT ErSnZ from Ohio. Appearing at Rick's. TUESDAY Liv Singer thinks he's a Hare Krishna, likes to play with snakes. Playing Hill Auditorium at 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $18.50 or $15 in advance at the Union Ticket Office, or by calling 763-TKTS. En.EN MqGANN 8 p.m at the Ark. Tickets are $8.75 at the door. GuzzAmt Amphetamine Reptile Records' punks play the Blind Pig with Cavernia. WEDNESDAY Cos FAN Tumn The School of Music Opera Theatre performs Mozart's comic-romantic opera about true love, fidelity and everything in between. Guest artist Linda Brobsky directs. 8 p.m., Lydia Mendelssohn Theatre, $16, $12 ($6 students), 764-0450. WTOUT A NET You write the comedy with this improvisational troupe. They're here every Thurs- day night, so don't you think it's about time you went to see them? 10 p.m., U Club (Michigan Union), $3 (entree plus it!), 763-1107. THE RoBeR's NIGHTMARE Two robbers separately hit the same house, and then the nightmare begins. This has nothing to do with the rollicking musical "The Robber Bridegroom." Presented by Prospero Theatre Co. 8 p.m., Performance Network (418 W. Washington), $12 ($9 stu/sen), pay- what-you-can-Thursday, 663-0681. COMPANY EMU Theatre presents Stephen Sondheim's brassy musical about love, marriage and being single when all your friends are married. 8 p.m., Quirk Theatre (EMU campus), $10 ($8 students), 487-1221. THE SISTERS ROSENSWEIG The first national tour of Wendy Wasserstein's Pulitzer Prize- winning comedy hits Detroit, starring Nancy Dussault, Linda Thorson and Greg Mullavey. Guaranteed nonstop laughs. 8 p.m., Fisher Theatre, $25-$37.50, (313) 872-1000. FRIDAY Corn FAN Tumn See Thursday, 8 p.m. THE RoBBER's NIGHTMARE See Thursday, 8 p.m. CoMPANY See Thursday, 8 p.m. THE SITERs RosENswEIG See Thursday, 8 p.m. S A T U R D A Y Cost FAN TurE See Thursday, 8 p.m. THE RonaE's NIGHTMARE See Thursday, 8 p.m. COMPANY See Thursday, 8 p.m. THE SisTERS ROSENSwEIG See Thursday, 2 & 8 p.m. S U N D A Y Cos FAN TuTTE See Thursday, 2 p.m. OUR Younab BLACK MEN ARE DYING AND NOBODY SEEMS TO CARE Written by James Champman in the tradition of Ntozake Shange's "For Colored Girls Who Have Consid- ered Suicide / When the Rainbow is Enuf," this "choreopoem" examines the identity of the young African- American male and his struggle to survive into the next century. Presented by Living the Dream, Inc. 5 p.m., Power Center, FREE, 764- 0450. THE RonaR's NIGHTMARE See Thursday, 7 p.m. CoMPANY See Thursday, 2:30 p.m. THE SMsTEnRoS RGUWEIG See Thursday, 2 & 7:30 p.m. T U E S D A Y TNE Swmn s Rossn w a See Thursday, 8 p.m WED N ES D A Y THE SISnS RoSENSWEo See Tuesday, 8 p.m. NOW ON SALE m