4 - The Michigan Daily - Friday, December 2, 1994
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420 Maynard
Ann Arbor, MI 48109
Edited and managed by students at
the University of Michigan
'Well, I guess we can stand it, so long as hogs are
20 cents a hundred.'
- An anonymous farmer, explaining his indifference
to the issue of imperialism in the 1900 election
JessieHallad y
Editor in Chief
Samuel Goodstein
Flint Wainess
Editorial Page Editors
Thanks? For
what? Pass
Unless otherwise noted, unsigned editorials reflect the opinion of a majority of the Daily's editorial board. All
other articles, letters, and cartoons do not necessarily reflect the opinion of The Michigan Daily.
AdvisorCorps
50N, WITH COM4PET iTiO2N LIKE THAT,
YOU'RE C2NONNA ' ATARVE!
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the turkey
ecently, Vince Keenan, Chairofthe Michi-
gan Student Assembly Students' Rights
Commission formed AdvisorCorps, a new
service to be provided to students charged
under the University's Statement of Student
Rights and Responsibilities (aka the Code).
This new service has the potential to be very
valuable to students if the administration offi-
cially recognizes its existence and purpose.
AdvisorCorps advisors will be students
trained by MSA's Students' Rights Commis-
sion and the University's Office of the Judicial
Advisor. They will all have an extensive knowl-
edge ofthe limits and workings ofthe Code. As
students charged under the Code seek
AdvisorCorps' help, student advisors will be
well qualified to help these students make it
through the Code process fairly. No longer will
students solely have to rely on the Judicial
Advisor's biased "neutral" interpretation of
The Code.
While MSA has already approved creating
AdvisorCorps, it cannot begin successfully
functioning without the approval of the Judi-
cial Advisor, who first communicates with
charged students and, therefore, is the one who
can best notify students of this valuable ser-
vice. Withoutthe administration's help, charged
students would likely not know of
AdvisorCorps and, therefore, solely rely on
the University's Judicial Advisor's advice.
Because of the unique and small clientele
AdvisorCorps will attract, typical advertising
methods would be fairly ineffective. The Uni-
versity has nothing to lose in promoting
AdvisorCorps; in fact, AdvisorCorps can only
help the University dispute charges that its
Code is unfair to charged students.
Supposedly, the Judicial Advisor remains a
M
neutral party in Code disputes. However,
there is an inherent conflict of interest in the
University being both prosecutor and defense
attorney. Regardless of what the University
maintains, this is the case. One cannot most
effectively advise a charged student if one
does not care about the outcome, but only a
fair and simple process. Under such circum-
stances, justice is sure to be sacrificed.
Admittedly, AdvisorCorps advisors may
not have as impressive of a legal background
as a lawyer.
But, since many students may not want to
enlist the service of Student Legal Services or
an expensive private attorney, student advice
is far better than no advice. Additionally, if the
AdvisorCorps advisors are committed to learn-
ing the Code's unique process, such a back-
ground should be sufficient to successfully
advise students.
AdvisorCorps would also be beneficial to
students who have just a simple question
about the Code or its process. The student
advisors would surely be more willing to fully
explain the provisions and ramifications of
the Code than a busy attorney who is not
receiving compensation for their advice.
Over the past two years, the administration
has shown no concern for the rights of accused
students; from the limited information avail-
able from the expunged files provided by the
University, it is apparent that the University
has systematically ignored the Code's proce-
dural protections for the rights of students.
The University's enthusiastic support andpro-
motion of AdvisorCorps could begin to re-
verse this apparent sentiment and prove that it
cares not only about a safe campus environ-
ment, but the legal rights of students.
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Espresso
accused of
booting
homeless man
To the Daily:
On Nov. 22, a cold, windy
night, I ventured out to Espresso
Royale Cafe on South Main to
relax and continue my studies.
The wind seemed to blow right
through me as I made the four
to five block trek, chilledI was
happy to arrive at the establish-
ment and enjoy the warmth of
the building within. I purchased
a cup of coffee, sat down and
proceeded to read my textbook
for the next hour and a half.
Like many others at this coffee
shop, I was encouraged by the
environment to linger long af-
ter my beverage had been con-
sumed.
Around 10:00, an elderly
man wandered in off the streets,
no doubt to escape the brutal
conditions outside. I got his at-
tention by greeting him, and he
asked to borrow my pen. I
obliged, and invited him to join
me at my table. His name was
Wayland, and although he was
quite clean, his haggard fea-
tures seemed to indicate that he
was homeless or had been out-
side for some time. He was not
drunk or smelly or boisterous;
indeed he was polite and unas-
suming. Peacefully, we sat
across from each other, I re-
turning to my book, and he
jotting down some thoughts on
a piece of paper. I was glad to
have made the acquaintance of
my new friend.
Suddenly, another man, this
one well-dressed and comfort-
able-looking, came to our table
and said he wanted to talk to
Wayland outside. It took a few
moments for me to realize that
Wayland was being kicked out.
I protested and told the man it
was okay, that I wanted
Wayland to stay and that I was
buying him a coffee. The man
said it didn't matter, that he
didn't want Wayland there, and
that since he was the propri-
etor, he had the right to kick
Wayland out. So Wayland was
thrown back out into the cold.
After dispensing of my
guest, the proprietor returned
to explain that Wayland had
been "making people uncom-
fortable" in front of the shop
before joining me. Although
he admitted that Wayland had
not been bothering anyone as
he sat with me, he muttered
something about Wayland ear-
lier smoking in the non-smok-
ing section. He explained the
type of customer who was wel-
come to hang out there, imply-
ing that Wayland detracted from
the atmosphere that the estab-
lishment tries to effect.
I don'tdoubtthatifWayland
was loitering in front of the
store, it made people uncom-
fortable. The mere thought of
an older man having no place to
sleep is disconcerting, and it is
not pleasant to be reminded of
such people. Even more dis-
concerting, however, is the ease
with which some elements of
our society comfortably shove
people like Wayland back into
the streets. To be sure, if
Wayland were merely making
a scene or being unruly in any
way, there would be cause for
reluctantly imposing this cruel
circumstance upon my friend.
But once hejoined me, Wayland
presented no inconvenience to
the patrons of the shop, except
that he didn't fit into the exclu-
sive environment of the estab-
lishment. Now that's something
that makes me uncomfortable!
So if you want to talk to me
about this topic, you'll have to
track me down at Sweetwater's
cafe on Ashley or Dom Bakery
on Main St. or one of the other
Espresso Royale establish-
ments in the area.
Keenen Dworak
Rackham student
After ingesting enough turkey to
feed most of Brazil for a week, I sat
down to watch some football on tele-
vision.
That's when I was hit with a
striking revelation: Thanksgiving is
basically just an excuse for Ameri-q
cans to take a couple of days off and
eat.
As far as health is concerned, the
average American is basically a walk-
ing McNugget. Our average choles-
terol level is higher than Keith
Richards. We have the body fat of a
congressional budget. I think our
health problems can be summed up
by the fact that George Foreman i
our heavywight champion. Think
aboutit: amiddle-aged guy whocame
out of retirement to support his $300-
a-day cheeseburgerhabitis the tough-
est guy in the country. Big George is
the first heavyweight champion in
history to be larger than life, literally.
That doesn't mean Foreman isn't
in excellent shape. I think most of us
would agree that round is an excel
lent shape.
But my point for today (yes, in a
shocking development, this column
will have a point) is not that Ameri-
cans are too fat. My point is that we
have been focusing our tunnel vision
on those sweet potatoes and stuffing
for a little too long, and we have
forgotten the true meaning of Thanks-
giving. I spent six hours eating an
watching television last week, and
the only time anybody said "Thanks"
was aftersomebody passed the noodle
pudding.
That's why I spent the last week
doing research on this national holi-
day, assembling this little quiz. Turn
your answers into the Daily. Second
prize is a free copy of today's Daily.
First prize is a free copy of today'
Daily, minus the column on page
four. (Hint: all answers are wrong,
unless otherwise noted.)
Question No. 1:
Thanksgiving means:
a) Two days off.
b) Four days off.
c) A three-day week.
d) Literally, "Giving thanks."
Question No. 2:
Although the original Thanks-
giving feast was in October, the fol-
lowing President scheduled the ac-
tual holiday in November:
a) Alexander Hamilton.
b) James Duderstadt.
c) Roosevelt. (This is the correct
answer.)
d) What are you looking at D for?
Come on! You already know that
is the correct answer! You should
know better than that. Go on to the
next question, namely:
Question No. 3:
The reason Roosevelt scheduled
Thanksgiving for the last Thursday
in November was:
a) He wanted the day off so he
could watch the Lions game.
b) He wanted to keep February
open so he could make his birthday a
national holiday.
c) Because.
d) If he scheduled it for Friday, he
wouldn' tget two days off, now would
he?
Question No.4:
The day after Thanksgiving is the
busiest shopping day of the year.
This is because:
a) People around the nation need
to buy heartburn medicine.
b) That's when Cher buys her
makeup.
c) That's when Madonna buys
her chains.
d) More people go shopping on
that day than any other. (This is the
correct answer.)
Question No.5:
There are dozens of songs about
Christmas, yet none about Thanks-
giving. Why?
a) Nothing rhymes with "Thanks-
giving."
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Seniority rules
Sen. Jesse Helms' (R-N.C.) statement that
President Clinton "better have a body-
guard" if he visits the senator's state has pro-
vided fodder for the media to blast Republi-
cans and their forthcoming choices for com-
mpittee chairs. Despite the talk about not elect-
ing Helms as Chair of the Senate Foreign
Relations Committee, most likely, the Repub-
lican party will maintain the status quo by
bowing to seniority and handing over the posi-
tion to Helms. In light of this impending deci-
sion, rather than bickering over Helms' nomi-
nation, Congress and American voters should
reconsider the Senate's nominating procedures
4nd demand more credible operations and
leaders.
In the next Congress, the Republican ma-
jority will most likely renew their old proce-
dures for choosing chairs. The process in-
volves forming the Senate committees and
then relying on the Republican members of the
individual committees to vote on a chair. After
the committees nominate their chairs, the Re-
publican Caucus votes by secret ballot to con-
firm the nominations. If the Caucus disagrees
with the nomination, it can suggest its own
preference and force the committee to recon-
sider its original nomination.
In fact, the last time the Republican Caucus
questioned a committee nomination was in
1987, when the Senate Foreign Relations Com-
mittee nominated Sen. Lugar (R-Indiana) as
ranking minority member. The Caucus voted
down the nomination and recommended that
the Committee nominate Sen. Helms. Although
Lugar and Helms held equal time on the Com-
rnittee, Helms had seniority in the Senate, and
the Caucus was determined to hold to senior-
ity.
The same issue of seniority is likely to
emerge in the next Congress, and once again,
the Caucus will not question whether senior
Senators such as Helms and Sen. Strom
Thurmond (R-S.C.) are and can be capable
and responsible leaders. The Caucus will ratify
them solely because of their advanced years in
office. By law, the individual committees and
the Caucus are not bound by seniority. By
practice, the Caucus is partial to senior leader-
ship. However, judging from the 1987 nomi-
nation, committees such as Foreign Affairs do
not rely solely on seniority and want to take
responsibility to elect the most capable chairs..
In order to maintain its integrity and to
respond to the American voters' desire for
leadership and change, the Senate should alter
this practice. One option is for the Senate to
create a rule or a new body, like the House's
Committee on Committees, which aims to put
the best people in leadership positions. Per-
haps more effective, voters can pressure their
Republican Senators to vote against unfit or
embarrassing nominees in the Caucus vote,
which is by secret ballot.
Incoming Speaker of the House Newt
Gingrich (R-Ga.) has pledged to abolish se-
niority as the sole determining factorforchair-
manships in the House. The Republican lead-
ership can not afford to spend their time
worrying about GOP politics; they are now
the governing party.
It's time they put the interests of the coun-
try above the Caucus and followed the lead of
the House.
Notes on The
Bell Curve
To the Daily:
I am writing in response to
Jean Twenge's column on natu-
ral intelligence (11/29/94). In
her column, she states that in
the book, the Bell Curve, au-
thors Murray and Horrenstein
"overgeneralize their findings
into social policy, racial differ-
ences and lots of other places
where they don't belong." She
then continues to write that the
SAT is not a good indicator of
general intelligence or perfor-
mance in college.
In this argument Ms.
Twenge assumes that Murray
and Horrenstein are saying that
the SAT is an indicator of intel-
ligence and performance in col-
lege.
This is not what the authors
have written or believe.
Murray and Horrenstein
have written that "some con-
vergence has been found when
SATs are used as measures of
ability and grade point average
is used as the measure of
achievement. Students with dif-
fering SATs sometimes differ
more in their freshman grades
than in later years. That is why
President Bok [former presi-
dent of Harvard University]
granted predictive value to the
SAT only for first-year grades."
This passage does not say that
Murray and Horrenstein con-
tinue to agree with Ms. Twenge
that "figuring out the net ef-
fects of testing or not testing is
no small matter. No one has yet
done it conclusively."
I am not writing this letter
in favor of the findings of the
Bell Curve, nor am I opposed
to them. My purpose is to re-
mark that debate of the issues
raised should be restricted to
close readings of the treatise.
Those tending to read or hear
about the book are most likely
misinformed. Most of the con-
clusions strictly concerning in-
telligence and success are noted
as observations based on sta-
tistical correlations(notion
cause-and-effect relation-
ships).
I hope informed discussion
on this matter will continue, as
it is a controversial topic which
deserves attention.
James C. Kim
Engineering senior
College
Republicans
are sick
hypocrites
To the Daily:
Throughout the past few
years, the College Republicans
(a.k.a. The Jesse Helms Fan
people about the disease. The
College Republicans' flyers tar-
get homosexuality as being
immoral and imply that moral-
ity and family values will stop
the spread of AIDS. We think
that most students would agree
with us when we say that this is
a very short-sighted view on a
very serious problem.
Who made the College Re-
publicans the experts on moral-
ity? Actually, these "defenders
of morality" are hypocrites. The
College Republicans printed a
newsletter just prior to Thanks-
giving break. In this newsletter
they included a list of things to
"be thankful for this Thanks-
giving."
One of the things that was
on this list was "the man on the
Grassy Knoll." The College
Republicans seem to be thank-
ful for the assassination of a
President of the United States,
John F. Kennedy. Our organi-
zation finds this Thanksgiving
list appalling. Is celebrating the
assassination of an American
President "moral?" We believe
that most of ourfellow students
would agree that it isn't.
Our organization is dis-
tressed that the College Repub-
licans have such a warped sense
of "morality." We hope that
they can reflect upon their own
morality and values before they
force them upon the student
body again.
We also hope that they can
use the remainder of this week
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Thhe media circus
When the 1985 Agusta 109 helicopter took off just after 10 a.m. to pick up a critical cardiac
patient in Howell, Mich., only to crash into a grassy field near North Campus, killing all three on
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