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April 15, 1993 - Image 25

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The Michigan Daily, 1993-04-15
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-
Page 18 -The Michigan Daily --Weekend etc. --Best of Ann Arbor -April 15,1993

" " 0

Best prices: State Theater. Noisiest audience: The losers at the made ourstomachs wiggle) and Harvey
Bugs Bunny film festival. Keitel and Tun Roth in "Reservoir
Stickiest floor: Briarwood. Dogs."

The Michigan Daily-Weekend etc.- Best of A
B EST' WRTS

Not a bad year for film, all things
considered. We had the good, the bad,
and the Briarwood ugly. But whether
you like art flicks at the Michigan, or
action fare at the Cineplex, the Ann
Arbor film scene has something for
everyone.
Best theater popcorn: Ann Arbor
1 & 2 (yumba!).
Worst theater popcorn:
Briarwood (the extra clump of butter is
for dipping).
Best theater: Michigan Theater
(obviously).
Worst theater: Briarwood.
Best line from a film: (tie) "Reser-
voir Dogs": "Two words: Learn to
fucking type"and"SimpleMen":"Why,
do women exist?"

Most comfortable seats: Show-
case.
Best lineup: Michigan Theater for
bringing us "Simple Men," "My New
Gun," "Reservoir Dogs" and all the
films no one else would show.
Most disappointing lineup: Ann.
Arbor 1 & 2 for "Cemetary Club" et.
al., and for keeping "Groundhog Day"
and "Howards End" there forever.
Best festival: (tie) Ann Arbor and,
Sundance.
Best film: (tie) "Reservoir Dogs"
and "Unforgiven."

The most annoying viewing oc-
currence: People shouting out the "se-
cret" of "The Crying Game."'
Most ironic patronstatement:The
woman who, just before "Reservoir
Dogs" began, said "I hope this isn't
really violent, like with people getting
body parts ripped off or something."
Slowest concession stand: Show-
case.
Best date film: (tie) "Nowhere to
Run" and "Under Siege."
Best cannibalism scene: The butt-
steak scene in "Alive."
Best love scene: (tie, LeGros
and Diane Lane in "My New Gun"' (it

Most overworked theater staff:
Ann Arbor 1 & 2: they sell you your
ticket, getyourpopcorn, take your ticket
stub, run the projector and give you a
full-body massage -- all for $3.00.
Annual Gary Cooper "Pride of
the Yankees" miscasting award:
Aladdin as Aladdin.
Best Cast: (tie) "Glengarry Glen
Ross" and "Reservoir Dogs.",
Best lobby for purchasing art:
Showcase (even better than the starving
artists' sale at the Holiday Inn. Plenty of
velvet Elvises).
Best soundtrack: (tie) "Singles"
and "Reservoirpogs." (Honorablemen-
tion: Nell Carter's Oscar night rendi-
tion of "Friend Like Me.")
Cutest bare-chested projection-
ist Walt from the Michigan Theater.
Worst Marty (Scorsese) rip-off:
"Night and the City."
Best original interpretive dance:
(tie) Mr. Blonde (Michael Madsen) in
"Reservoir Dogs" (to "Stuck in the
Middle with You") and the group dance

from "Simple Men" (to Sonic Youth's
"Kool Thing").
Best use of the cha-cha: Seymour
Cassell in "In the Soup.,
The annual Brian De Palma most,
blatant misogyny in a film award:
"The Crying Game," for its desire to
eradicate women entirely.
Best film to take a nap in:
"Howards End" (wake us up when
Leonard Bast gets killed).
Most overrated: (tie) "Howards
End" and 'The Crying Game."
Best hair: Aladdin's - it didn't
move.

Best Game: Rose Bowl win
The Wolverines finally earned awin
in the granddaddy of them all, getting
revenge against Washington in the pro-
cess. Now that Gary Moeller hasaRose
Bowl title under his belt, he can set his
sights on a national championship.
Best Unsung Heroes: (tie)
The following non-revenue teams
won Big Ten championships in the past
year: Men's Swimming, Women's
Swimming, Softball, Women's Cross-
Country, and Women's Gymnastics.
Best Show of Respect for an Op-
ponent: Ray Jackson
When asked about Coastal Caro-
lina; Michigan's opponent in the first
round of the NCAA tournament, Jack-
son said, "I don't know anything about
them. All I know' is that they won their
little tournament."Which brings usto...,
Best Mismatch:
Michigan vs. Coastal Carolina
TheChanticleershadaboutasmuch
chance against the Wolverines as Rich-
ard Nixon has of getting elected again.
Best Performance:
Tyrone Wheatley
Wheatley rushed for a career-high

238 yards in the Rose Bowl, including
runs of 88, 56, and 24, despite not
playing in the fourth quarter because of
a back spasms. Wheatley earned game
MVP honors for his efforts.
Best Play:
Ray Jackson and Chris Webber.
Inthe waningminutes ofMichigan's
game at Penn State, Jackson passed an
alley-oop off the backboard to Webber
to seal the victory.
Worst Excuse for an Announcer:

Bill Walton
Before the NCAA basketball tour-
nament, the former UCLA and Port-
land Trail Blazers star said that the
Wolverines were "the most overrated
bunch of underachievers" in the history
of basketball. After Michigan made the
finals for the second straight year,
Walton said very little.
Best Stacking of Olympians:
Jon Urbanchek
The coach of the Men's Swimmng
team had silver medalists Gustavo

Borges and Eric Namesnik, along with
Olympians Marcel Wouda and Royce
Sharp, on his squad, which fimished
second in the country.
Best Streak: Football
Michigan won 19 straight confer-
ence games before tying Illinois, 22-22.
That's the longest streak in the history
of Big Ten football.
Best End to a Streak:
Women's Basketball
For a while there, it looked like

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