Page 2-The Michigan Daily-Weekend etc.-October 15,1992

Frankly, we
Frank's Restaurant is the cheap-
est, dirtiest, greasiest, smelliest, best
diner in Ann Arbor. The uninitiated
will know Frank's as the hash house
behind Nickel's Arcade that seems
eternally closed - its hours of opera-
tion are as enigmatic as Le DOg's.

give a damn
that one cannot make themselves (with
a sponsorship from Crisco). First tim-
ers are strongly recommended to "pat"
the greasy precipitates off their en-
trees with a napkin. However, the
gastrointestinally-empowered will
scorn such shameless testimonies of
wank.
Frank's decor is murky. The pine
green/burnt sienna motif was prob-
ably once maize and blue, but years of
use, grease, and smoke have had a
begriming effect. Thumbs up to the
Red Cross How-to-Give-the Heimlich
Chart pasted immediately below one
the restaurant's zillion advertisements
for "gyros." Pasty-mouthed, hungover
clientele are forewarned to exercise
caution when descending the stairs to
get to the bathrooms. The best table in
the house is the gargantuan booth in
the back, and there's more duct tape
on the seats than a '76 El Camino.
The service will spark fond remi-
niscences of home-cooked meals, if
your crotchety old mother was for-
ever pissed at having to cook for you
See FooD, Page 8
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Wizered connoisseurs, however, will
fiercely guard their knowledge of the
diner lest it become too popular and
sissyfied (read: Angelo's).
The food at Frank's has the bizarre
ability to counteract the effects of
overly-optimistic alcohol intake, caf-
feine withdrawal, and general mal-
aise. The menu consists of emblem-
atic diner fare. Breakfast items, ham-
burgers, sandwiches, and flagrant caf-
eteria-style "specials" are mainstays.
There is nothing offered at Frank's
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ARTS EDITORS
Michael John Wilson, Alan J. Hogg, Jr.

EDITOR
Jessie Halladay

kkI IUW CONTRIBUTORS
Melissa Rose Bernardo, Mark Binelli, Jason Carroll, Rich Choi, Steve Culver, Rachel
Glauberman, Aaron Hamburger, Nima Hodaei, Roger Hsia, Doug Kanter, Patrick Kim,
Alison Levy, Michelle Phillip, Dave Skelly, Chris Slovey, Scott Sterling, Michael
Thompson, Jason Vigna, Sarah Weidman, Kirk Wetters, Josh Worth

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