The Michigan Daily/New Student Edition - Thursday, September 10, 1992- Page 15
-- A truly sick joke
by Ken Davidoff
Daily Sports Writer
Good day everyone, and wel-
come first-year students. In addition
to its stellar coverage of Michigan
sports, the Daily also provides a
weekly scope of the Big Ten football
Each week, a qualified Daily
staffer who 1) knows the ups and
downs, the ins and outs of college
football and 2) has some time to kill,
will offer perspective and predic-
tions of the upcoming Big Ten foot-
Please keep in mind that the
writer of this piece likely knows as
much about college football as, say,
Joe Namath does about quantum
physics, and these picks should not
be used as a basis for your wagers.
And don't bother my dad, either;
he's got a life, you know.
Missouri (0-0) at Illinois (1-0)
It's a classic battle of the
Midwest as the Tigers travel to
Champaign to take on the Fighting
If there's one thing I can't stand,
it's teams with the word "Fighting"
in their nickname. Are they implying
that teams without this moniker are
pacifist and would actually rather
follow the Grateful Dead than play
football? In the name of Poseidon,
ruler of the seas, what is this world
Illinois 21, Missouri 14.
Miami (Ohio) (0-0-1) at
I can tell you Indiana's season in
a nutshell right now: victories in
their non-conference games and over
the lousy Big Ten teams, losses to
the Big Ten powerhouses, and a tie
in some lame bowl game.
If life were like Indiana's football
team, we would just know what's
going to happen, and then we could
just chill out and watch "Knight
Indiana 35, Miami 8.
Iowa State (1-0) at Iowa (0-2)
(The text of this passage has been
censored due to its anti-Iowa con-
tent. Certain members of the Daily
are quite sensitive about jokes per-
taining to corn or "Field of Dreams"
and have thus mandated this sec-
tion's deletion. Kids, this is what
America is really all about).
Iowa 45, Iowa State 3.
Central Michigan (0-1) at
Michigan State (0-0)
Now that he has relinquished his
athletic director title, George Perles
can concentrate all his efforts on
coaching the Spartans. Lucky them.
Fresh off one of the more pitiful
seasons in MSU history, Perles may
have to crank up his innovative
offense - maybe he'll snap the ball
right to the tailback, Tico Duckett.
After all, we all know that's who the
quarterback (Jim Miller) is going to
give it to anyway.
MSU should handle Central this
time after last year's embarrassment,
but it doesn't. change the fact that
Michigan State 13, Central
San Jose State (0-1) at
It's the debut of new Golden
Gopher coach Jim Wacker, as fans
flood the Metrodome in a tidal wave
of enthusiasm. Here's a little known
fact: San Jose State is 3-17 against
Midwestern teams whose coach's
last name is "Wacker."
Minnesota 34, San Jose State 33.
Northwestern (0-1) at Boston
Look for new Wildcat coach
Gary Barnett to get his first victory
sometime around the turn of the cen-
tury. BC is actually decent again, al-
though not as exciting as the days of
Doug Flutie. Whatever happened to
Flutie, anyway. Oh, that's right, he
went on to star in those "Home
Boston College 31, Northwestern 7.
Bowling Green (1-0) at Ohio
The most interesting thing about
this game is the announcers - Dan
Dierdorf and his college coach Bo
This will be really cool for us
Michigan folks, for the two men will
spend the entire broadcast reminisc-
ing about the "good o1' days" and
will probably embrace on more than
This should be vastly more enter-
taining than the game itself.
Ohio State 72, Bowling Green
California (1-0) at Purdue (0-0)
A Rose Bowl preview? No.
California 129, Purdue 6.
Wisconsin (0-0) at Washington
Wisconsin has as much of a
chance of winning this one as
Skippy did of hooking up with
If you look back, were there any
"Family Ties" episodes that didn't
end with two characters reconciling
their differences and hugging? But,
then again, what would we do, baby,
without us? Sha Ia la Ia.
Washington 98, Wisconsin 0 at
halftime; at this point Wisconsin
drops its football program and the
Iluskies win by forfeit.
Continued from page 13
add sports because that costs
money;...we're not going to add the
74 because we can't afford it."
According to Weidenbach and
Bradley-Doppes, Michigan's short-
term plan will most likely consist
of a combination of additions and
cuts. Considerations include lifting
certain club sports to varsity level,
especially women's soccer, but
current women's varsity teams will
not be inflated just to increase the
number of participants.
It is unlikely that revenue-pro-
ducing programs such as football or
men's basketball will be affected,
yet other men's programs will cer-
tainly receive participation caps.
More will be determined at Ath-
letic Department meetings in the
"If you reduce football, (men's)
basketball and hockey you're going
against your own self-interest,"
Weidenbach said. "If you do things
that hinder your ability to earn, you
do things to reduce revenue and that
Most other Big Ten institutions
are in similar situations to Michi-
gan, searching for ways to meet both
gender equity and cost containment.
Institutions must not only worry
about the former, but student inter-
est, logistics and competition
Adding sports, or moving clubs
to the varsity level, may increase
costs and lead some schools to have
a team with no competition for it. It
takes six schools to sponsor a team
before that sport qualifies for con-
ference competition. Without con-
ference competition, teams would
need to search for it outside the re-
gional area, leading to high travel
"It's not in our best interest to
add a sport nobody has," Ohio State
Athletic Director Jim Jones said.
"We could add skiing, but there are
no mountains. We could add crew -
we have a river that goes right
through campus - but we have no-
body to compete against. So we're
working out a plan."
In the long run, cost containment
will lead to great changes in the
S R-NV- E
way Michigan and other Big Ten in-
stitutions finance athletics. Tiering,
a practice already in affect at Penn
State, consists of financing a sport
according to its level of competi-
tion - conference, regional, or na-
tionalt.Sports competing on the na-
tional level, football and men's
basketball, receive the most finan-
cial support while conference-level
sports get the least. This will result
in the limitation of where and how
well certain teams can compete ac-
cording to where they fit in the tier-
"I'm against tiering, because it
tends to promote mediocrity,"
Jones said. "I'm not comfortable
with that. We're better served with
One of the most vocal critics of
the act is Michigan State football
coach and former athletic director
George Perles. In his last act as ath-
letic director, Perles cast the lone
dissenting vote to the act, before
former MSU president John DiBag-
gio changed his school's vote.
Perles' biggest criticism of the act is
that it hurts the student athlete.
"As far as equity goes, we can
make it work. But don't take away
from the kids," Perles said. "It's
amazing how decisions are made.
We have all the administrators there
- the presidents, the counsel, the
league office, the commissioner, his
staff, the athletic director, his
coaches. So, who do you pick on?
The kids. Ah, let's cut. Let's take the
kids' scholarships away. They're not
here, they're not gonna complain.
Ah let's take the kids' food away,
let's take their travel away."
Camden Yards blends
intimacy with amenities
by Chad Safran
Daily Sports Writer
BALTIMORE - In the movie Field of Dreams, a voice told Kevin
Costner, "If you build it, he will come." In the case of the Baltimore Orioles
the phrase became, "If you build it, they will come." The Orioles built it and
they are coming. The "it" is Oriole Park at Camden Yards.
This modern-day palace is a baseball fan's dream, combining the great
atmosphere of such old-time stadiums as Wrigley Field, Fenway Park and
Tiger Stadium with the modern amenities of Skydome in Toronto. No dome.
No artificial turf. No other uses. It is a ballpark.
Upon entering Camden Yards, as most people refer to it, fans may feel
they have hopped into a time machine. Because of the small foul territory,
the fans are close to the action, like it was in the days of yesteryear. Some
spectators have complained that the left field foul line seats face toward
center field, but that is a compromise for being able to extend your arm.and
run your fingers through the lush grasses that cover the playing area.
Fortunately, one thing that makes this jewel of today unlike the anti-
quated gems of the past is the absence of girders that often obstructed the
fans' view of the action (see Tiger Stadium as proof). No one has to stretch
their bodies and necks into crazy contortions to see a ball being caught.
Yet, this is not the only part of the ballpark that gives it such a majestic
presence. Beyond the high right field wall, 460 feet from home plate, the
B&O Warehouse gives the stadium a great deal of its special character.
Renovated as part of the ballpark construction, the 1,080-foot long build-
ing houses the Oriole offices on the first five floors, while the Camden Club
takes up the top two levels. For a one-time $1,000 membership fee, a
monthly charge of $100 and a minimum monthly food purchase of $35, a
fan can join this exclusive club which offers picturesque views of downtown
Baltimore and the inner harbor. Just as fans know of the Green Monster, a
37' 2" high, green wall in left field at Fenway Park, the B&O Warehouse
will be the signature mark of Oriole Park at Camden Yards.
The ballpark continues its unique setting with its bullpen construction.
More often than not, spectators strain their eyes to view who is warming up
for relief duty. Not here. Taking a fan's suggestion, the bullpens are two-
tiered, like a pair of steps, giving the fans a better look in and the players a
better view out. Hopefully, the groups constructing the new parks for the
Texas Rangers and Cleveland Indians will incorporate this simple, yet inno-
However, the feeling one gets when entering through the iron gates of
Camden Yards is what truly makes the place so special. Walking through
the festive atmosphere of Eutaw Street, where legendary Oriole Boog
Powell serves up hamburgers and ribs at his barbecue pit (yes, he is really
there preparing the day's dietary delights) are a reminder of the essence of
the game. One look at the field and a fan would expect to see legends from
decades past in wool flannel uniforms taking grounders or roaming the out-
field shagging fly balls before game time.
With the creation of Oriole Park at Camden Yards, the Baltimore Orioles
have built what was once a field of dreams into a jewel of reality.
Continued from page 13
mine whether a self-report to the
NCAA is necessary, Weidenbach
said. If this is done, as was the case
when the baseball program came
under fire in 1989 for recruiting vio-
lations, the NCAA can accept Michi-
gan 's explanation or determine that
rules were violated. If rules were
violated, Michigan can declare
players ineligible and appeal to the
NCAA for their reinstatement.
Chang stops Washington,
advances to quarterfinals
NEW YORK (AP) - Fourth-
seeded Michael Chang avoided an
upset Tuesday night, stopping for-
mer University of Michigan tennis
standout MaliVai Washington, 6-2,
2-6, 3-6, 6-3, 6-1, to advance to the
quarterfinals at the U.S. Open.
It is the first time Chang has
reached the Open quarters, and it
was Washington's sixth consecutive
five-set loss, all in Grand Slam
events, dating back to the Australian
Ivan Lendl doggedly marched past
Boris Becker into the quarterfinals in
the longest match since the advent of
the tie-breaker in 1970.
After 5 hours and 1 minute,
Lendl finally survived the war of at-
trition, angry words and often bril-
liant tennis, 6-7 (7-4), 6-2, 6-7 (7-4),
In a renewal of one of the great-
est rivalries in men's tennis,. Lendl
ended his 20th match against Becker