Page 2-The Michigan Daily-Weekend etc. - April 9,1992 Jonathan Chait A little knowledge is a dangerous thing Note from the author: This is my second to last column ofthe year, which means that I have only two columns left to accomplish my original goal of offending every major group on campus. I hope to get this taken care during this column, and then maybe I can take next week off However, if you belong to a campus organization which has not been offended over the course of the year, please contact the Michigan Daily and we'll try to work you into next week's column. B efore I begin writing about Hash Bash, I want to make it clear that I am j definitely pro-legalization. I have long accepted, without question, the more common pro-marijuana arguments, such as: UMarijuana can provide the cure to all major diseases. 0 Hemp can be used to make cheaper clothing, fuel, schools, and homes. George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Jesus all smoked pot. So from an ideological perspective, I am in complete agreement with the National Organization for the Reform of Marijuana Laws, or NORML. My only problem with them is their acronym. It's a misnomer. Running around in masks and triangle hats carrying 12 foot-long paper mache joints is generally not considered to be "normal." Not that this is bad. Ij ust think they should have a different name. And while we're at it, we should also urge a name change for SALSA, the Latin-American student group. I think they would have a lot more members if they didn't have such an insulting acronym. I, for one, would be reluctant to join a group called "BAGEL." Although I didn't attend the Hash Bash festivities this year, a member of NORML (I'll call him "Fred") took the initiative by marching into a Daily editorial board meeting and demanding, under the Freedom of Information Act, to see the files that we had compiled on him. We tried to explain that we ire a newspaper, not the CIA, and we don't keep files on people, and that the Freedom of Information Act does not apply to a private organization, and in any case, we would have to consult with our superiors in Washington anyway. (You can have a lot of fun with the paranoid.) Nevertheless, Fred insisted on seeing his files, apparently interpreting the Freedom of Information Act to mean that anybody can get any information they want from anyone, at any time. (Hey you! What's the capital of Burma? Who was Millard Fillmore's vice-president? I demand to know! It's my right!) My first reaction to this person was that perhaps he was living up to his group's ideals just a little too much. But on second thought, maybe he's on to something. Think about it. If you're having trouble with an exam, you could just present a FOIA request to your professor demanding that he provide you with the correct answers. Or, for instance, you could submit a FOIA request to the president of the College Republicans, demanding that he relinquish a report detailing all the times and places that he has publicly picked his nose. The only problem that I could foresee would be if the Native American Law Student Association started using this technique. Knowing them, they would probably begin sending FOIA requests to random students requesting the details of our sexual histories. So maybe we should stick with the conventional interpretation of the Freedom of Information Act, although we would miss the opportunity to get some answers from some of the more suspicious characters on this campus, particularly those Nazi child molesters in the U-M Bridge Club. I. - \YUi WAN~T ANMf headhoulerslneeandoe I Madras or blue serge suit? If you haven't had one yet, you're going to have one soon, and you need to be decked out in the proper threads in order to make the right impression. We're talking, of course, about interviews for summer jobs and beyond. Whether you're opting for an outdoorsy position or an of- fice job, it all boils down to image. How you dress for that crucial con- versation can instantly tell your future employer whether to hand you a contract or whether to hand you your hat (figuratively, of course; avoid potential hat-head situations when being interviewed). That you want to work outdoors shouldn't be reflected in your inter- view clothes. Try to look as pressed as possible, without conveying a sense of Buttoned-down person. Wearing a skirt or a nice pair of pants, with a casual dress look about you (maybe throw on a blazer, navy, for instant panache) will show that you can be ready-for-anything without fear of breaking a Press-on. Don't bypass the old standard blue suit for a more staid job; however, blue does not necessarily mean boring. Make sure that your skirt is hemmed at, or a bit above, the knee. And add some color to your per- sonality - a white shirt beneath the suit is classic, but add pattern by in- serting a paisley pocket square or tie. Keep jewelry simple. Above all, a smile is the best thing you can wear. Don't leave it at home. I M .%GA GINS Nv r? a I I I (Ma~ow~y1 i t ff *1 4Traa1 - to'' WgwN; e Fe mmwmmmmmmmmmm 9 1/ -o l FO ,. . I PbOR JEFFRE~y JUST STARTED) His 30 AT A B3OOK STORE. CAN you, HEL~iP H VA SORT THE CH 1LDERF'N BOO0KS FROM TH4E. "A1'ULT' kS? I I i I ADVENTUES oa ROVER f£k. to,~.e. tog M . i APP/TAKSA BS 114' j 4ms NMS GIAwdtPlcXLE 0 LtrTE WET WILLY KZ- toNsom GOES X4 Th}E CoN(dOEST of 1'ANSF\,ENt> M Z. 23ONNSON GOES -- PUSSs 'ri 3O ' po>,t cn{,er(c'5- s ;re lactgS 1. fUc3N W I14 ANIMrALS DErEC7'1vE.. t te." caeof *JE-l~c JfJT CA'E. WiL~y wONK&, CHOC OLATE- TrACTOrZ EAE t- UtJ1'( lAS. M~t)FF1NS tiaoK of ©ET"ECTI V E ZOP P- Ca~se of th~e S&Q