+r0 70 How to Write Creatively ,_ f 7ti ".a+'t t, ? .. ' .. i+ 1 ,:'' _ _ .. _ ;_ 4' . i , ,i } . , ., " . , 6 ; y It has been said that creativity is inborn: either you have it, or you don't. This may be the case, but fortunately for would-be writers, there exist norms that can allow anybody to write creatively, or at least to fake it. The most important rule for every writer-in-training to JESSE remember is very simple: follow WALKER the formula.Originality is fine and good if you want to be hailed as a genius a hundred years after you're dead, but for here-and-now benefits like sex, money, and film contracts, you'd be best off finding the formula that's right for you and sticking to it all your life. Luckily enough, most formulas are short and easy to remember; all you need to do is fill in the right blanks and flesh it out to the proper amount of pages. One caveat: the last thing any "serious" (as opposed to "popular") writer wants to be accused of is writing formula fiction. Therefore, it is recommended that if you want to be a major thinker and win prizes and go on lecture tours, you not deviate one inch from the "artistic, non-formula creative fiction" formula, completely untainted by hints of a literary breakthrough. The bare bones of this sort of story goes something like this: "Bob" (or whoever) has existential problems and eventually goes to a cliff (or bpach, or rooftop, or very large hill). Here, he confronts the aluord nature of everyday life that lies at the root of his probllms with his job (or wife, or husband, or homosexual lover, or conformist neighbors) and triumphantly conquers them by leaping joyfully to his physical doom.i (If you wish to be avant-gardeyou might instead write the hip, updated version of this formula, in which "Bob" thinks about leaping, but instead firds himself feeling the wind against his face and realizing th at his life, yea, all life, is truly a good thing.) This is a perfect story to write for a creative writing class, a student writing competition such as the Hopwood awards, or a small literary journal. If you do well with it, you are on your way to being reviewed in The New York Times. Meanwhile, those of you who prefer big bucks to critical accolades may wish to try writing popular fiction. For your benefit, then, here are ways to alter our.basic formula so that it fits into one literary genre or another, along with methods for making your story avant-garde, up to-date, and thoroughly hip. whole conspiracy. Imply are, in fact, true, but gut stars are hiding the truth Science Fictio A flying saucer desce hand of peace to "Bob," the skies. Final line in st WATCH FOR THE RO OFF. Hip update: have the as "Bob" is on the spacec human being has been d unleashed via cyberspace Fantasy Know, prince, that "B of Agnathor, and left the in the valley below the c Mystic Sword of Paloaltc before the time he woub as its king. Hip update: exactly tf woman. Mystery Diining and _Drinking - ..' As "Bob" gazes out fr The Spy Thriller from behind; if he doesn Libyan terrorists, manipulated by surviving Nazi he dies from hitting the smuggle drugs into America; "Bob" sees them from the Inspector Dim arrives wi cliff, and is drawn into a netherworld of betrayal and and solves the mystery. deceit. Hip update: have the Hip update: make the terrorists Iraqis, and suggest that serial killer. In the final Gorbachev is duping us and the U.S.S.R. is behind the r Inspector Dim himself Sze-Cbua, W s Cocktails . Dining " Carry Out - Luncheon . Specials SZECHUAN - HUNAN - MANDARIN Hours: M-Th,11:30-10; F,11:30-11 Sat., Noon-11 pm; Sun., Noon-10 pm Happy Hour. 4-7, M-Th 2161 W. Stadium (East of Liberty) Ann Arbor * 769-5722 1100 E. Catherine at Glen - 761-8996 Open 6 a.m. -4 p.m. weekdays 6 a.m. - 3 p.m. Sat., 7 a.m. - 2 p.m. Sun. Serving breakfast and lunch all day. Featuring homemade raisin bread Favoritesfor over 30 years. j b S BATED*** for dining excellence by Mofly Abraham of the Dtot Free Prees - a i Nf1~ , I'ha } . e .. ti kgjlijfNhl: RESTAURANI T "27 YEARS EXERENCE" CHEF JANv" TOP GOLD MEDAL WINNER OF DETROIT COBO HALL NATIONAL CONTEST & BEST CHEF AWARD IN WASHINGTON D.C. 1201 S. University 66-:445 Open 7 Days 11 n4 pm GARDEN Szechuan, Hunan, and Peking cuisine Delivery, take-out, dine-in, cocktails, and Sunday buffet Hrs: Mon.-Thur., 11:30 am -10 pm Fri., 11:30 am -11 pm Sat., :noon -11 pm Sun., noon -10 pm 3035 Washtenaw Ave., " 971-0970 t'tQx5 Italian Restaurant Homemade Pastas & Pizza 665-0444. Take Out 300 Detroit St. at Catherine (across from Farmer's Market) PARTHENON FINE GREEK FOOD ONlhjlB~l GYROS & SHISH KABAB _,, SANDWICHES 1 *CARRY OUT SERVICES- CHICKEN STEAKS *-PASTA LIMB CHOPS - LAMB SHISH( KABA|S MOUSAKA - PASflSJQ - DOLMADES - SPINACHI PIE GREEK SALADS & PASTRIES. COMBINATM PLATES FULL COCKTAIL MENU 226 S. MAIN at, Mm-Sat 11aim-1 m b A: NoA -1012 Liberty - Ann Arbor CALL M9-1012 Custom Sandwiches, Italian Sausages, Mediterranean Cuisine,* Fresh Salads, Fresh Pasteries, Fresh Fruit Drinks, Plus Much More! Dine-In, Carry-Out, or Catering 715 N. UNIVERSITY - 663-0069 7 /p y Mandarin, Szechuan, and Hunan Specialties. Exotic Drinks, Full Bar. Carry out, Quick Lunch Special, Sunday Brunch. Open 7 days a week. 3535 Plymouth Rd.-665-3591 4905 Washtenaw Ave.-434-7978 Students Welcome Have you tried a new restaurant lately? Dining and Drinking helps you find the best restaurants in Ann Arbor!!! & SZECHUAN CUISINE Dinner Buffets Mon.-Thurs., 5-9 pm Lunch Buffets Every Day, 11lam -2:30Opm " All You Can Eatl Paris Is Burning Fascinating documentary about a New York subculture of drag queens. (Jennie Livingston, 1990) Mich Th. 5:00 & 9:40 * 6 * 9 0 * Cyrano de Bergerac View the dieu in Gerard Depardieu. (Jean-Paul Rappaneau, 1990) Mich Th. 6:50 * 9 * 0 * * Dementia 13 Ultra low-budget horror flick from the director of Apocalypse Now. Part of a Friday the 13th horror triple feature. (Francis Ford Coppola, 1963) MLB 4 7:00 Wrestling Women vs. the Aztec Mummy More horror from the director of The Brainiac. (Rene Cordona, 1965) MLB 4 8:50 * 0 - ' ' *9 Godzilla vs. the Smog Monster The eleventh and possibly greatest Godzilla movie offers a scathing environmental message. (Why do you think they call him "Big Green"?) (Yoshimitsu Banno, 1971) MLB 4 10:15 -* * 0 . * 0 Night of the Living Dead Despite a lousy remake and endless ripoffs, the original is a true horror classic. (George Romero, 1968) MLB 3 8:00 .* * 0 S * 0 Friday the 13th Way better than the sequels. Not. (Sean Cunningham, 1980) MLB3 9:45 S A T U R D A Y La Femme Nikita If you've never liked French films, here's one for you. This Americanized action thriller stars the energized Anne Parillaud as a criminal turned government assassin. (Luc Besson, 1990) MLB 3 7:00 & 9'00 . 0 . 0 . .6 Impromptu Romantic comedy about the wacky escapades of Fred Chopin, George Sand, Franz Liszt and others. Stars Mandy Patinkin, Judy Davis, Julian Sands and Emma Thompson of Dead Againfame. (James Lapine, 1990) MichTh. 5:15 . 0 0 . 0 .0 Paris is Burning See Friday. (Jennie Livingston, 1990) Mich Th. 7:35 & 11:30 * . . . 0 .0 Pee Wee's Big Adventure Insert obligatory autoeroticism joke here. (Tim Burton, 1985) MLB 4 7:00 & 10-00 Flip Chicks X-rated fun about the making of a porno flick. For some reason, coupled with the Pee Wee Herman flick. (Johannes de Silentio,1972) MLB 4 8:45 * - 9 . 0 .0 Mortal Thoughts Any thriller that kills off Bruce Willis in the first half-hour can't be all bad. With Demi Moore and Glenne Headly. (Alan Rudolph, 1991) Mich Th. 9:30 Reefer Madness Cautionary tale about the "evil weed." (Louis Gasnier, 1936) Aud A 8:30 * 0 - 0 0 -0 Harold and Maude Black comedy about hearses and transgenerational love. (Hal Ashby, 1971) Aud A 10-00 S U N D A Y Eyes of Youth / Smouldering Fires The Ann Arbor silent film society presents films starring Claire McDowell, Clara Kimball Young, Rudolf Valentino and other stars. Admission $2. Sheraton Inn (across from Briarwood) 3:00 * 0 0 0 6 0 La Femme Nikita See Saturday. MLB 3 7:00 & 9:00 Mortal Thoughts See Saturday. Mich Th. 4:35 Impromptu See Saturday. Mich Th. 6:45 * ' 6 6 * 0 Paris Is Burning See Friday. Mich Th. 8:35 MONDAY Rashomon Essential classic about a murder seen from different viewpoints. With the great Toshiro Mifune. (Akira Kurosawa, 1951) Mich Th. 7:00 Paris is:Burning See Fday. MichTh.:9:00. TUE S DRAY Rashomon See Monday. Mich Th. 7:00- Paris is Burning See Friday. j Mich Th. 9:00 W ED N E S D AY Chameleon Street Y Critically acclaimed first film Michigander Harris, partly filmed i nn Arbor. "I think, therefore I scam. . (Wendell B. Harris, 1991) Mich Th. 7:20 Paris is BumIng See Friday. Mich Th. 9:30 Chameleon Street See Wednesday. Mich Th. 7:20 Paris is Burning See Friday. Mich Th. 9:30 L Have you tred a new restaurant lately? Dining and Drinking helps youfind the best restaurants in Ann Arbor!!! i 11 * 0 0 0 0 6 Page 11 - - WEEEIV Septei