Page 10 --The Michigan Daily - Wednesday, February 14, 1990
rio

7 Not for the tight of wallet

Loose Cannons
dir. Bob Clark

.. .

BY JEN BILIK
Shame on Gene Hackman and
Dan Aykroyd for not knowing
better. Coming from, respectively,
The French Connection and The
Blues Brothers, there is no
ostensible reason besides des-
peration that they could have chosen
to make such a film. Seeing movies
starring foolish nobodies on the
Holly-wood trash-cinema make is
revolting enough; a movie with
proven talent this bad is positively
sad.
How many jokes can we make
about the title alone? One: in Loose
Cannons, more is loose than the
cannons. Two: seeing as cannons
appear nowhere in the movie itself,
Hackman and Aykroyd must have
extremely loose (albeit large)
cannons. Three: how many loose
can-nons does it take to screw in a
light-bulb? (answer: with all of
Aykroyd's on-screen personalities,

they wouldn't all fit inside the
lightbulb). Shall we stop there?
For those of you not yet deterred,
a small plot synopsis. Hackman
plays Mac, a policeman so eccentric
no one will be his partner. (Ddja
vu?) Aykroyd fails as Ellis, the man
who imitates (among countless
others) the Roadrunner when under
extreme duress. This ,multi-
personality disorder seems to exist
for no other reason than to showcase
Aykroyd's impersonation talents.
Imagine the hav-oc this sort of
disorder poses on the beat.
Count Loose Cannons as one
more German-bashing film, because
im-mediately Mac and Ellis plunge
into a murder case involving
pornographic movies of Hitler.
Germans are cruel and Aryan, and
Jewish characters are on a mission to
nail their twice-removed asses.
Plunk down Dom DeLuise as Harry
Gutterman, the 350-pound porno
king and owner of the Hitler film,
and this movie is complete. You
can't blame DeLuise, though,
because just recently he was reduced
to doing Ziploc com-mercials. This


movie must've seemed like Othello
to his hungry wallet.
Aykroyd's impersonations fall
flat in the entertainment department, *
and Hack-man's smart-ass one-liners
need a ba-dump-dump to remind us
to laugh. Aaron Spelling's role asp
producer be-comes evident when one"
of Aykroyd's personalities sings the
theme song to The Love Boat.
Director Bob Clark, better known for
cinematic excellence in Porky's,
leaves in the dick jokes but leaves
out Julie the cruise director. Is there
anything good about L oose
Cannons? No.
LOOSE CANNONS is playing at Fox
Village and Showcase

,- r - -
He walks, he talks, he sings like a reptile
Folk singer/instrumentalist/all-around meister David Bromberg headlined last year's Ann Arbor Folk Festival
and keeps coming back here for more adoration from his local fans. His stylistic range is super-wide, his tone
biting, and Bromberg is a humorist as well as a musician. He's at the Ark, 637 1/2 S. Main, tonight at 7:30 and
10 p.m. Tickets are $12.75, available at.the Union or the door.

PASS
IT
AROUND!

0

.5

C

C

2001:
A Space Odyssey
IN 70mm DOLBY STEREO
Tonight 9:45

-0.
f

C

ALIEN

X
I

C


ro flier~u

U--
wa2qhP~r

Eu


ANN ARBOR I - - -
A massive clean-up
campaign has begunc
on campus and studentWith Any Purcha
cassette players haveP
been designated as the FREE Discwasherca
initial target area. The purchase of $15.00 or
students have been Not valid with othe
T0290-03 1
responding well to the®
project mostly because
Record Town is offering them a FREE cassette
head cleaner when they make any purchase of
$15.00 or more. "Operation Head-Wash" has
been instated as the first phase of a bigger project
whose goal is to get students to take responsibil-
ity for the overall appearance of the campus.

Our
se Of
at Recor(
ssette hf
r more. I
er offers.
M

- * * Committee chairman
iI Ivan Stravinski gave
the following explana-
$15.0 Or More tion: "With all the gar-
$15.0 Ornreeabage that comes out of
d Townande ceive a these kids' tape-decks
ead cleaner with any ths-istp-ek
Limit 1 per customer. we felt this was the
. Expires 2/18/90. perfect place to start
- --® S the clean-up." The pro-
motion will be going
on until February 18th, while supplies last.
Phase II of the project will begin immediately
after, with campus pubs being slated as next in
line for an overhaul. School officials felt there
would be no problem getting students to spend
time in the bars.

r
i
'S
4
4
a
d
'
a
u
B
a
t
f
d
d
M
4l
Y
Y
Y
a

Get These Great Pictured Hits $6"C$1133

I

THE THE
Mindbomib

"w wwT I 7 7s--r

I

m