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Travolta, Alley shine
in offbeat Talking
By Brent Edwards tus tugs on its umbilical cord and shouts,
October 8, 1989 "Hey, how about a little apple juice down
Dear Diary, here!"
Help! I'm embarrassed and I don't know Kirstie Alley plays the unwed mother who
what to do! I just saw that juvenile-looking wants to find a responsible father for her son,
movie Look Who's Talking and I can't Mikey. Travolta is actually good as the
believe I'm saying this, diary, but I liked it. kooky friend; Alley is destined not only to re-
How am I going to keep my reputation as a alize that she loves him but also - surprise,
film critic if I give a good review to a movie surprise - that he would make the best father
starring John Travolta? Next thing you know, for the kid. When he's not attempting to act
I'll be raving over Judd Nelson and Burt and just tries to be funny, Travolta can be
At left, Kirstie Alley and
Olympia Dukakis cuddle
with the newborn tot whose
voice sounds surprisingly
like that of Bruce Willis.
Below, John Travolta is all
smiles around the wise-
cracking baby.
r
t
Poniewozik
Continued from Page 10
STAN: OK, time for my favorite
part of the show. Who wants Old
Stan to put their problems in per-
spective for them?
(A little girl clutching a teddy
bear walks down from the audience
and sits on Stan's lap.)
STAN: What is it, Princess?
GIRL: Mommy and Daddy called
each other a lot of bad names, and
Daddy hasn't come home for three
days. When I ask Mommy about
him, she just cries. (Sniffles.) I want
my Daddy back.
SADIE: Honey, I hate to break it
to you, but chances are your no-good
daddy's shacked up with some floozy
in a two-room apartment over a
massage parlor. You probably ain't
never gonna see him again.
(Little girl bursts into tears.)
STAN: Sweetie, I'm afraid
Cowgirl Sadie's right. But you
know what I do when I feel bad like
you?
GIRL (Sobbing): Wh - what?
STAN (Sings):
Well, sometimes when I'm de-
pressed
And gloom has me in its throes
I got me a little song I sing
And this is how it goes!
Oh, I didn't get hit by a train to-
day
1 didn't get stabbed with a fork
I didn't get thrown in a shredding
machine
And sold in the store as pork!
I wasn't dropped in the sewer
Nor forced to eat my own eye
I didn't get hit by a train today
I guess I'm a lucky guy!
GIRL (Smiling): Thank you,
Stan!
STAN: That's all the time we
have today, kids, but Monday I'll be
back and we'll talk about "What to
do when your friends hit you up for
money!" So remember, until next
time...
KIDS: ...never trust anybody!
Yaaaaay! U
t'4
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-r'A
Reynolds movies; I'll be staying home on
Tuesdays so I can enjoy the talent of Tony
Danza on Who's the Boss. Have I gone mad?
Diary, what am I going to do?
So goes my diary entry the night I saw a
sneak preview of Look Who's Talking, writ-
ten and directed by Amy Heckerling (who also
directed Fast Times at Ridgemont High).
Starring disco/country/aerobics dancer John
Travolta and Cheers' Kirstie Alley, I antici-
pated a mediocre movie with humor and plot
more befitting an episode of Growing Pains
than on the big screen. With this in mind, I
was amazed to find the film both funny and
entertaining.
The movie's offbeat humor is evident in
its first scene, in which we are shown an egg
moseying its way down a fallopian tube and
soon after a platoon of talking sperm racing
for the prize. This sets up the gimmick of our
being able to hear the baby's amazingly ma-
ture thoughts, courtesy of Bruce Willis. His
delivery is perfect for the baby's wisecracks:
at one point, while still in the womb, the fe-
very entertaining. Director Heckerling even
pokes a little fun at him by playing "Staying
Alive" as Mikey and stroller amble down a
New York sidewalk.
Much of Heckerling's humor has a refresh-
ingly feminist slant - Alley growls for pain
reliever during labor with a voice like the
possessed Linda Blair in The Exorcist.
Mikey's sarcastic thoughts combined with his
cute antics, however, are what keep this film
alive and keep the audience's interest. The
standard birth scene where the mother is given
her first loving look at her newborn baby is
hilariously turned around here as we see the
scene from the baby's point of view: "Put me
back in! Aahh, who's that?!" he thinks as he
sees his exhausted mother for the first time.
Compared to recent films about relation-
ships and raising kids - When Harry Met
Sally... and Parenthood - Look Who's
Talking is predictable, unsophisticated, and a
little silly. This enjoyable piece of fluff will
keep you laughing, however, and will make
you feel glad about predictable, happy end-
ings.
A4
6.99 Cass./12.99 CD
DON HENLEY
THE END OF THE INNOCENCE
Featuring: THE END OF THE INNOCENCE
THE HEART OF THE MATTER
a 2
I
I
MELISSA ETDG E
BRAVE AND CRAZY
I
S,
p
AC
Buttholes
Selleck is innocent, but his film'
S
guilty of predictability
By Jen Bilik
Considering that Tom Selleck is
one of those guys for whom every-
body has a soft spot but just can't
admit it, it's easy to go into An In-
nocent Man with an open mind. Di-
rected by Peter Yates,(Bullitt, The
Deep, Eyewitness) the film actually
has some real potential. Unfortu-
nately, though, the movie holds in-
terest far less than the press info
(which informs us that screenwriter
Larry Brothers actually did time),
quickly lapsing into a formulaic
style with trite and sappy lines that
attempt to be morally virtuous.
The film begins by establishing
that Jimmie Rainwood (Tom Sel-
leck) is one helluva guy. As an air-
plane mechanic, he works to make
sure infants can fly without fear. His
wife Kate (Laila Robins) chides him
about his fat intake, and then cooks
him romantic fried dinners to show
she's still responsive to his needs.
But because nothing can be this
hunky-dory in Hollywood, we soon
realize that there are two bad guys
out there, eager to prove their viril-
ity by using their positions as nar-
cotics cops to steal drugs from the
scene of the bust and sell them at a
whopping profit. A fouled up tip
leads them to Jimmie's for a bust.
After mistaking his blowdrier for a
gun, they shoot him, forcing them
to cover up their stupidity by plant-
ing him with drugs and a gun. Jim-
mie, predictably, is found guilty and
sent to the big house.
Everything pretty much goes
along according to formula from this
point on. Jimmie feels indignant
that he's going to jail and occasion-
ally enlightens us with a speech on
liberty and the American way: "You
still have to be proven guilty of
something in this country before
they throw you into prison!" Highly
inventive stuff.
Somehow, though, Tom Selleck
just doesn't cut it. He has an ami-
able, easy personality which does
well in roles like "Magnum P.I."
and Three Men and a Baby. But
when he tries to espouse his views
on issues close to the heart, you just
want to laugh at his earnest A-for-ef-
fort attempts.
Selleck simply does not have the
presence of a Stallone that would be
necessary to pull off this kind of
film. His sluggish progress in learn-
ing the diplomacies of prison life
See Innocent, Page 11
Continued from Page 5
ages ranging from close-ups of a
mass of brown centipedes and other
insects to Charlie's Angels reruns
projected upside down and back-
wards.
Mean.while, the band members
pound away, seemingly oblivious to
the surrounding visual, aural, and
mental chaos. The tall shirtless one
with long black hair appears to have
recently escaped from a nearby men-
tal institution. The guitar player to
the right stares bug-eyed at the audi-
ence, his face frozen inhan evil, ma-
niacal grin. Often, they sing or
shriek through some kind of voice
synthesizer that at times makes them
sound like very small children (or is
it dolphins?) and at other times like
Satan speaking through Linda Blair
in The Exorcist. Sometimes, in fact,
they actually do inject some sort of
devil lyrics among their random rant-
ings, but it's impossible to make
much logical sense of it all.
It's also hard to say if the naked
girl-woman is dancing to the music,
or if the band merely plays according
to her movements. Either way, her
performance is mesmerizing - not
in a sexual way, since the display is
too weird for that, but just for the
spectacle of it, the way she curls up
into a ball, shakes her whole body,
then gradually opens up like a moth
exiting a cocoon, extending both
arms out to the crowd with an ex-
pression of supreme joy and con-
tentment.
This experience has transcended
the level of musical event, and now
seems more like a religious celebra-
tion - but with a sinister edge to it,
due to its sheer insanity. The effect
can actually be quite disturbing.
Sure, lots of bands use weirdness as
a way of appearing "new musicky"
(Love and Rockets comes to mind),
but watching the Butthole Surfers,
you can't help thinking, "God, these
people must be deep-down mentally
unbalanced in real life."
Eventually, just to see if I can
pull my eyes away, I look around at
the audience. Except for the occa-
sional stage diver (who sends the
dancer-woman scurrying back in ter-
ror), the crowd appears hypnotized,
zombie-like. I begin to suspect that
the sound crew has discovered some
frequency level that takes control of
the human nervous system, forcing
us to pay attention like dogs listen-
ing to a high-pitched whistle that
only they can hear. For the most
part, the transfixed witnesses to this
display stand motionless and open-
mouthed, watching in awe, in disbe-
lief, or, like me, in blissful and utter
confusion. I see a speaker fall from
one of the stacks on the right side of
the stage. It's hard to tell if anyone
gets hurt by it. But nobody seems to
notice.
The show ends and the house
lights come back on. After the
mandatory cheering dies down, peo-
ple just sort of stand around and look
at each other, trying to regain their
bearings on reality. I feel as though
I've just woken up after a terribly
shocking dream, but am unable to
piece together the details of what ex-
actly happened, and why. Driving
home, Matt and I agree: it's going to
take a while to sort out all we've
seen and heard tonight. All we know
for sure is that we've experienced
something important, something
that demands further investigation.E
The Butthole Surfers will bring
their, um, unique act to St.
Andrew's Hall, 431 E. Congress St.
in Detroit tomorrow night. The
show begins at 10 p.m. and tickets
are $11.50
NO SOUVENIRS
KICKSTART MY HEART
TIME FOR CHANGE
SAME OL'SITUATION
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$2.
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at THE BEACH BOYS
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Sale ends
October 22. 1989.
iscount rec
"When it comes to music, cc
300 State Street South 665-3
ALSO AVAILABLE AT MUSICLAND Arborland Consumer Ma
Page 4 Weekend/October 13.1989
Page 4
Weekend/October 13, 1989
Weekend/October 13.1989
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