PERSPECTIVES the Michigan Daily Thursday, November 10, 1988 Page 5 Bush Y JIM PONIEWOZIK When his unibrowed poker face first made its way onto my TV screen, I would have scoffed at the "thought of my having a single thing 'in common with Michael Dukakis. I was right. I have two things in common with Michael Dukakis. 1) I'm also 5'8" and don't think 'm a "shrimp." 2) We both have found out what -happens when you mess with the Pledge of Allegiance. " It was a Monday morning much like any other in Mr. Fannin's 9th 'grade biology class, and we budding 'ivisectionists were idly chatting as we waited for announcements to .'come over the intercom. At 8:00, the speaker crackled to life with a "Good morning" from the principal, Dr. Randall. As the club meeting dates dusted Dukakis and lunch menu drifted down from his tired old voice to our tired young ears, we braced for our favorite round of mass indoctrination - the nation- al anthem and the pledge. Somewhere in the recesses of a first floor office, a tone arm thunked down on the grooves of a "Star- Spangled Banner" recording. To some senescent educator somewhere in my hometown, this weekly event meant that Monroe, Michigan, was safe from the prospect of a Bolshevik rev- olution for yet another generation. To us, it meant having to stand up for about two minutes and make the "tsch!" sounds under our breath where the cymbals were supposed to be. After the anthem, the class in- stinctively rose in formation for the pledge of allegiance. All of the class, that is, except my friends Tim, Mike, and myself. It wasn't a con- scious plan; it was more a matter of our starting to rise hesistantly as usual, and our eyes meeting at just the right time to affect a collective "naaah..." And amid the collective irate stares of our classmates and Mr. Fannin, we gave our feet a rest and sat wearing the smuggest of grins. As a pseudo-intellectual 20-year- old who's taken philosophy, psych- ology, and political science and thus has a complete understanding of the workings of the entire universe, I could give you lots of reasons for not forcing kids to recite the pledge. It encourages religious intolerance (yes, folks, that god it says we're under is the same Mr. J. Hovah who rested on the seventh day), it encourages blind loyalty, it belittles its meaning - to name a few. As a restless 14-year-old, just say it was stupid. Unfortunately, I picked th time to make my stand. It w 1983; jingoism Reagan-sty still in full swing, we were ourselves against the evil beh of Nicaragua and Grenada, "Hey Iran" stickers (showing] Mouse giving the finger unpictured Ayatollah), still many of our bumpers. To high-schoolers, America was dude, and thus it was even c beat the tar out of little Tro like yours truly. Marc Prucka considered1 up to said challenge. Marc was reasonably popular, un ably dumb, and unbelievablyt therefore a perfect scion of t with P1 gan Youth. It stood to reason, then, I could that as word spread outrage mounted among my classmates, he would be e wrong the one to decide to pound a sense of as early patriotism into my head. yle was According to the rules of the girding Warm, Funny American Columnist hemoths genre, this is the part where I decide and the to fight it out with Marc, get Mickey bloodied up a little, and emerge with to an the respect of myself and my school. graced Sorry, gang, but Russell Baker's out junior of town. Instead, what transpired gnarly, were a few of the worst months of ooler to my life. I cravenly slinked out of ev- tskyites ery possible confrontation with Marc. I was called a "communist" by himself kids I'd never met before in my life. I Prucka was jeered by kids who didn't even treason- know what the word "indivisible" big, and meant. he Rea- And I stood up for that damn pledge every Monday thereafter. edge So when I heard George Bush lay into Michael Dukakis for vetoing a bill requiring Massachusetts teachers to lead their classes in the pledge, the election was no longer George vs. Michael. It was Marc vs. Jim. I saw Bush appealing to the same animal- ism that made me an outcast. And I wanted so badly for My Fellow Am- ericans to stand up for me now like they didn't then. Instead, they bought the ploy for all it was worth. To the American electorate, Michael Dukakis had swiped our baseball, eaten our apple pie, and smacked our mother, all in one shot. And, Tuesday night, they made their choice. But though they'll see George Bush take the stand on Inauguration Day, I'll see a big 15- year-old who wants to beat me up. Here's to you, Marc. It's your country. -w DAILY CLASSIFIEDS WORK!! ...Needing tickets for the big game, I decided to place a ') Classified ad in the Daily. WithinS, S three days, I received 50-75 calls!... -Heather Foote ...My apartment had a 12 month lease, and I wanted to go home for the summer. With the Classified CV S *. ad I found a subletter and saved a '- & ', lot of cash!... -David Greenzang - 40,000 people read the Daily each day! c >5 - 6v - ~ A~