Page 8 - The Michigan Daily - Wednesday, October 26, 1988 I 1 000 Paul Simon Negotiations and Love Songs Warner Brothers Before I tell you why this record is about as exciting as kissing your sister, let me say that I genuinely like Paul Simon. Call me a wimp, call me ethnocentric (New York metro area white Jewish male sports fan), call me whatever you want. I can take it. My feeling is that Paul Simon, when he looks at something other than his own despair, is a fine songwriter and his attempts at rock- ing out are so cute and endearing that I fall for for 'em. Simon's solo work is full of great semi-rocking songs ("Me and Julio Down By the Schoolyard," "Kodachrome," "Late in the Evening," Graceland, etc...) but is also peppered .with cloying lame saccharine sensitive singer song- writer bullshit ("St. Judy's Right," "Something So Right," etc...). I think that Simon's solo albums stand up very well, where, except on the overly introspective Still Crazy After All These Years and the just plain bad Hearts and Bones, the rockers outnumber the plodders. That said, here are ten reasons why this record is like kissing your sister: 1. This is holiday season product filler designed to suck more money out of your pocket. If you're hesitant about getting into Paul Simon, then I recommend you get 1977's Great- est Hits, Etc. and 1985's Graceland. 2. The mix of songs here is half rock/ half shit, and out of their orig- inal album context, the shit here stinks worse than ever. 3. There are no liner notes, no photos, etc... None of the cool stuff that should be included on a double album retrospective are present. 4. The sequencing blows. They should have mixed it up chronologi- cally to make things fresher. 17 Pigmies Welcome Great Jones/Island Records Certainly one of the strangest records I've ever experienced. I would call the Pigmies the Picasso of avant-garde music, though it's probably giving them too much credit - abstract, surprising, and at times annoyingly confusing. It's a mediocre record, but god, is it strange. The record/project as a whole can be summed up as a cross between the work of William S. Burroughs, the Residents, and Saccharine Trust. The Pigmies co-produced the record with Moris Tepper of Captain Beefheart, and I expect that's part of the reason for its consistently weird vein. The spoken- word fragments by playwright Charles Schneider that they call drama are the most grating part of this record. Who needs a surrealistic dramatic twink popping up every five minutes to spew boring ideals and anecdotes? It really doesn't work. The music is, surprisingly, pretty good at times, spotlighting the only redeeming quality of the band, vocalist Louise Bialik. Her silky smooth/no nonsense, Roberta Flack/Siouxsie Sioux voice undermines the predominantly carnival-style musical glop the rest of the band has fallen into, and the only songs of merit are the ones on which the instruments are lost behind her voice. The band is trapped somewhere in the vast regions of Celtic folk, carnival tomfoolery, and techno-pop sewage, and the whole idea behind the album creates a pathetic attempt at tying together too many "artsy" aspects. -Robert Flaggert The construction and collection of Negotiations and Love Songs make Paul Simon's latest his lamest. 5. The title of this is ridiculous. Negotiations and Love Songs ? How's about "Wimpy Jewish Kid From Forest Hills Who Wants To Be Black Writes Some Pretty Good Songs"? It's much more telling and a whole lot less pretentious. 6. This album crams two discs GET IT! The Personal Column MICHIGAN DAILY CLASSIFIED ADS into one very flimsy and cheap sleeve. Let's see some gatefold ac- tion, and some nice heavy cardboard instead of this piece-o-crap. 7. The vinyl itself is very thin and weedy. While it sounds better than the harshly "correct" compact discs and useless casettes, I'd like to have a heftier platter to heave around 8. Nowhere on this album am I thanked for my contributions to Paul's art and career. 9. The cover photo of Paul in Sam Spade type getup makes him look goofier than Mike Dukakis in a tank. 10. Go to number one... -Brian Berger Toots Hibbert Toots in Memphis Mango Toots will always be known as one of the great voices of reggae. He's a legend in Jamaica, where he and his Maytals began popularizing the island music and its accompanying ganja culture more than a quarter century ago. His classics, "Pressure Drop," "Monkey Man," and "Reggae Got Soul," are some of the most exciting and successful reggae/soul fusions ever. The idea is that Toots got soul, right? The idea is to fly him out to Memphis, soul's hometown, where he can belt out some of the standards that have influenced his music for so long. At first, he seems to have a ball with them, his rocksteady take on Eddie Floyd's "Knock on Wood," and the tricky hi-speed curves of (the soul singer to which Toot's sweet gravel is most frequently compared) Otis Redding's "Hard to Handle," are rollicking blasts of Funky Kingston. Unfortunately, even the best are never so good as to rise above weak material. The other tunes he has selected are less famous, less inspired readings, and one mediocre original. Stodgy, unsoulful horn arrangements drag down much of the remainder of the album, and Toots' own glee with these songs sometimes dissolves inexplicably into Vegas-like show biz sludge. Even Sly and Robbie, reggae's Duke and Earl of rhythm seem relatively tame. A disappointment. --Mark Swartz Souled American Fe Rough Trade A soulful country-folk band with a modern outlook, Chicago artists Souled American seem seriously dedicated to their country roots. They flesh out their sparse arrangements with traditional country instruments: acoustic guitar, bass, harmonica, drums, some electric guitar, and occasionally lap steel guitar. The loose playing never gets downright sloppy and is the perfect accompaniment to the raspy, raw vocals and honest lyrics. "She Broke My Heart," a straight forward country lament with a standard topic, and the humorous "Feel Better,' with its cynical, self-effacing lyrics, are great songs to be listened to over and over. -Chuck Skarsaune 6 4 Es Bain & Company, Inc. Management Consultants cordially invites The University of Michigan Classes of 1989 & 1990 to a presentation and reception on Associate Consultant Career Opportunities and Internships in Corporate Strategy Consulting 6 .# 4 4 - Boston " San Francisco Thursday, October 27, 1988 The Michigan Union-Anderson Room II