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Best responses: The spotlight's on the readers

By Alan Paul
Counting ballots has got of be one
of the most boring things one can
possibly can do. Only a few things
kept us awake and going strong: the
camaraderie of doing something inane
together, the sharp wit of Dudley
Rabbit, and of course, the humor in
some of the responses. With no fur-
ther ado, here are some of our fa-
vorite answers.
BEST BURGER,
"Stop 'N' Go microwavable" suc-
cored it's annual vote in this cate-
gory. Does the same person vote ev-
ery year or is there small but wide

based support for these things? I
mean sure, they might be alright
when it's 4:30 a.m. and you're
strung out and coming down off of
some sort of vicious high, but this
was supposed to be "the best burger"
not the most convenient.
BEST BAGEL
"The fishbowl" somebody wrote.
Well, yes, those bagels always do
somehow taste better in an Angell
Hall auditorium.
BEST SEAFOOD
Two people voted for "Long John
Silver's" and that, my friends, is a
pretty scary thought.

BEST FOOD BARGAIN
"Stop 'N' Go" Stop 'N' Go? How
in the hell could anyone think this
place is a food bargain? Get a clue!
The real bargain lover's voted for
"free samples at Kroger's," "Ramen
noodles," or "Mott's Applesauce."
BEST LATE- NIGHT EATS
"The candy machine" claimed one
respondent. You must be a real
stoner- just couldn't make it out of
the dorm and =just had to eat some-
thing, right?

restaurants, but who can argue with
"to the cleaners," "hell," "out of
town," "California," or "krogering?"
If you do feel the need to take them
to a restaurant, "Ponderosa" seems to
us a pretty good option.
BEST DORM CAFETERIA
Various forms of there isn't one
won out here, including: "Are you
kidding?" "Ack!" "Ugh!" "void," and
"are you kidding?" One reader in-
formed us that "Absolutely none but
it's easy to sneak into East Quad."
Thanks for the tip.
BEST SHOE STORE
"Anyone that will sell to me"

sounds suspiciously like the writings
of a shoe junky. We didn't realize
that shoe stores were carding so in-
tently lately. Is this some sort of
new government crackdown? We
know the University administration's
been getting a little out of control
lately, but are they really clamping
down on shoe buyers?
BEST COPY SHOP
"Jesuit monks" one person wrote.
Father, it's a miracle.
BEST LIQUOR STORE
Somebody voted for Marshall's but
obviously they were not one of your
Continued on Page 27

B EST PLACE
THE FOLKS

TO TAKE

Of course, we were thinking of

"You didn't want to work
for them anyway!"
Come and celebrate
Rejection Night
at
Bring in a rejection slip from a Graduate School or Job
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BEST COPY SHOP: Kinko's
Kinko's should win the best copy of the "Best Copy Shop" category; this
place his been winning this for six years. This blurb is getting really cir-
cuitous... what was I saying?
BEST LIQUOR STORE: Village Corner
It's interesting that VC wins this category every year in light of the fact
that half the student body can't legally purchase alcohol there, and those that
try quickly find out why VC has the reputation of being the biggest hard-
asses around. But regardless of where you get it, liquor is liquor. Enjoy.
BEST BOOK STORE: Border's
For people who are easily susceptible to extended bouts of book store
browsing, you better set aside two hours for this place, maybe more. Go and
see for yourself. I learn something new every time I walk in the place. Fuck
the University.
BEST USED BOOK STORE: David's
Who are the people on the mural outside this place, Woody Allen? Edgar
Allen Poe? And what do they have in common? If for nothing else, a visit
to David's may be worth finding out the answers to these questions alone.
BEST RECORD STORE: School kid's
A hands-down winner for the sixth consecutive year, this is, to say the
least, a dominant force in the business. did you know they'll order anything
for you?
BEST USED RECORD STORE: Wazoo
A high quality, wide ranging selection guarantee these annual winners
continued success. They've got it all from hardcore to cool jazz to classical.
BEST CANDY STORE: Drake's
"Limeade, and chicken salad sandwich... I said, LIMEADE AND A
CHICKEN SALAD SANDWICH! !" The essence of Drake's.
BEST COOKIE STORE: Mrs. Peabody's
Cookie stores come, and cookie stores keep coming. And they don't go
away. Oh well, these cookies ain't bad. Congrats Peabody, keep bakin.'
BEST ICE CREAM STORE: Stuchi's
A lot of people go to this place, but they wont admit it. Stucchi's lovers
come out of the closet.
Continued on Page 8
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PAGE 26 WEEKEND/APRIL 15, 1988

WEEKEND/APRIL 15, 1988