S L" ARTS I : The Michigan Daily Tuesday, February 14, 1984 Page 7 A boy for you, a girl for me Ann Arbor Contact Lens Clinic A Full Contact Lens Service FEBRUARY SPECIAL EXTENDED WEAR LENSES $325 DR. PAUL C. USLAN 545 Church Street " Ann Arbor 769-1222 LONDON (UPI) - A "delighted" Prince Charles and Lady Diana are ex- pecting their second child in Septem- ber, Buckingham Palace announced Monday. The announcement of Diana's pregnancy eclipsed reports in British newspapers about the appointment of a new Soviet leader in Moscow and ended months of speculation over an addition to the royal family. Palace officials said Diana, the Prin- cess of Wales, was "in excellent health" and would continue her public engagements for the time being, although an Italian tour she and Charles had scheduled for October has been canceled. If born in September, Diana's second child would be just over two years younger than her first, Prince William of Wales. William, born June 21, 1982, is second in line for the throne behind his father. The new child will be third, whatever its sex. British bookie firms immediately of- fered betting odds on the new baby's sex and gave a slight edge to the possiblity of a girl. One bookie accepted bets at 10 to 11 on a girl, even money on a boy, 25-1 against twins. Another set the odds at 4- 5 on a girl, even money on a boy, 50-1 against twins. Doily Photo by CAROL L. FRANCAVILLA George Carlin counts off number two on his expanded list of words you can't say on television. Carln: ore dirty words Princess Diana .. sets the odds SHORT OR LONG Hairstyles for Men and Women DASCOLA STYLISTS Liberty off State . 668-9329 Maple Village ... 761-2733 By Michael Fisch :'WELL LADIES and gentleman, I yVY have some news for you -there are no longer seven words you can't say on television. Freedom of speech gone awry? No, instead of seven, George Carlin upped his list of naughty vocabulary last Saturday at Hill auditorium. Here are just a few of the 150 additions that hopefully can be printed in a newspaper chock full of editorial freedom: Shlong, m shaft, bald-headed mouse, one-eyed wonder worm, waxing the dolphin, spank the frank, shoot putty at the moon, getting your pole varnished, polishing your rocket, up the hershey highway, and 68 .(You do me and I'll owe you one). W Was the list of words in good taste? Who cares, it was hilarious. Carlin talked about a lot of things civilized types don't discuss much - farts, stomach gprglings, the different parts of a swallow, burps, accidental spitting, that almost throw-up that crawls up your throat every so often, and blowing your nose, "Blowing your nose? It doesn't seem possible, I mean your own nose - maybe a friend could do it, a real close friend." Carlin was at his best when he talked about all of our private/psychological embarrasments, "Like when you go to shake someones hand and they don't notice - you have to pretend that sticking your hand out is something you do all of the time. 'Hey, I learned to do this at the beach."' Sometimes Carlin went a bit too far, though. "Ever go to shake hands with someone who's got a fake hand and you kind of have to pretend that it feels great." He expected us to laugh about Records - Ian Anderson - Walk into Light' (Chrysalis) The pied piper of rock n' roll, Ian An- derson, returns with a disturbingly modern sounding solo album, Walk into Light. Anderson, formerly of The Jethro Tull Band, nearly abandons his fabulous flute playing and fills the void with synthesizers and a hand full of other electronically-induced sounds. Tull fans will be disappointed with these inorganic vibrations but Ander- son brings a few songs back to earth with his excitingly characteristic voice and his piping-hot flute. Most of the tunes are dominated far too much by the unearthly synthesizer, but two songs, "Made in England" and the title cut "Walk Into Light," embody all the feeling and musical emotion reminiscent of the Tull band. The vocals have an oriental feel to them and Anderson slides into them with a spiritual-like rhythmic chanting which becomes mystical and entrancing. "Made in England" is the only song which comes close to highlighting An- derson's intense flute playing and those times you're talking to somebody who has a wandering eye, and you don't know which eye to look at. This stuff is not on the top of my funny joke material list. Carlin did another bit on losing things that was funny, but dragged on a bit too long. When he started talking about a guy who lost a bowl of noodles I didn't laugh, I couldn't even smile and say "I know whatcha mean." For the most part, the worst reaction someone can have to a Carlinobit is a smile (not fake) and an "I know what you mean." When Carlin crossed that line the going got rough. This didn't happen too often, but when it did, it was a disappointment. Then again, you can't expect a guy to be hilarious for two straight hours. Carlin is a comical artist. If he's just done a long piece he knows to slip in a few quick bits to get things moving. If a joke isn't all that it could be, Carlin's audio-visuals save him. In factyou're cheating yourself if you only listen to Carlin's albums. So much of his act depends on facial expressions and body language. Carlin's older material was just as funny at this performance as it has been in the past. He did "the differen- ces between baseball and football' - you might have seen it a few weeks ago on the Johnny Carson show. "In football you receive a penalty. In baseball you make an error - oops, I made an error! In football you play with downs, in baseball you play with ups - whose ups? Are you up? I'm not up... Carlin also performed his, "Take a shit"routine. "Take a shit. What are they talking about - I leave one ... "I'm gonna take a shit. leaves one wanting more of this fingering. But he decides "less is more" and in doing so makes a grave mistake. With the exception of these two songs, the album has a definite undertone of pessimism conveyed through the lyrics as well as instrumentally. Anderson seems to be searching for a Utopia and in "Looking for Eden" is disappointed to find that perhaps it isn't there at all. He also views Germany, in "Dif- ferent Germany," as a dark chill gathering still before the storm, and in the final cut "End Game," Anderson sings of the end of life as a slipping in- to grey . . . when sleep comes ,around. Anderson's solo album leaves one wanting the crisp vocals of old, the return of the intense flute playing, and a fall out of the super-saturated syn- thesizer. Anderson can be given credit for breaking personal ground with new sound, but the faithful Jethro Tull listeners will be disappointed with An- derson's strange latest effort. - Robert Danowski "You better not take mine, I've got two left and the weekend's coming ..." Some of Carlin's funniest material fell under the heading "ways to keep people on their toes." "You ever notice how often people want to give you coffee? ... "Next time someone asks you if you want a cup of coffee say 'No, I need some toilet paper and some cat food.' "Shit, might as well get something you need." If you want the chance to really laugh at yourself (in the comfort of a large audience) check out Carlin the next time he's in town. You may never spit, burp or fart quite the same way you used to. an Tone-N-Tan Sun Tan Salon Open on Campus TROPICAL TAN for as little as $40.00 FIRST VISIT FREE * Don't burn in Florida * Keep that Florida tan * Come ask about our Monthly Specials 613 Church 2nd Floor 665-8885 I _____________________________________________________________________________________ gER For a unique experience in coffee delicacies, come to The Corner Market in the Michigan Union ... Ann Arbor's only campus speciality coffee shop ... with special ble'nds by the cup or ground by the pound, Espresso and Cappuccino, all accompanied by a delicious selection of fresh pastries. Come visit with us Wednesday, February 15th, for a special preview of our coffees, 8-1 lam and 2-4pm ... we think you will be delighted! UNION Ground Floor STARTS FRI. 2 /17 /84 Woody Allen's "BROADWAY DANNY ROSE" ON OPENING DAY, FRI. 2/17/ 84, WEAR YOUR WOODY ALLEN GLASSES AND GET EVENING TICKETS FOR $2.00. TN9OF I3RUARV 198L1 23 N. WS4 N-f 3s. -P uWNQe;IAJNJ lLAt - 40!-zSc 96W MN 7Ives *PI 7$VUi%3FAN; I34 (o AL coi rc'r ,p r7v o9 Yo 7ny Ti A~ sR1 j F-yy oil Lu.G SA; Ai. pE1 OfOWAI i!Y VA W'1F6UR IZ ~ ~ Et t .5,ON! o! ISSUES ON CAMPUS THURSDAYS 7:30 - 9:30 P.M. SI T l