eag a Seven
Thursday, May 27, 1976
THE !MICHIGAN DAILY
Thursdy, May27, 176 THEMICHIGN DAIY P'ag Seve
jinment
ARTS STAFF: Cara Mia Prieskorn, Tim Prentiss, Pamela Ross,
David Keeps, Mitch Dunitz, Claudia Evans, Eric Gressman, Tom
Godell, Kevin Counihan, Scott Billings; David Rossiter, Kim Potter
Grizzly'- Toothsome tall tales
By LORENE STERNER
een-foot bear, place in a dense, thickly-wooded
k, preferably with Scenic Fall Coloration. Sup-
incompetent campers and lissome, knowledge-
k) camperettes. Guess which ones nine out of
bears will prefer to devour?
st time; those lissome camperettes are delight-
uite frankly,.what a hongry growing bear needs
aummy rumblings is the pudgy camper. Not only
ore meat on them (tender, flavorful, and prac-
"FDA Choice" on their foreheads) but people
et when one or two of them disappear because,
ar is performing a public service by removing
an obnoxious one at that - from the public
,ment that Grizzly's avid viewing public appears
mainly of such eyesores is a cheap cut and I
,rge to mention it.
for verisimilitude and the discerning girl-
deals with the tenth bear. The plethora of
sary to satisfy the voracious appetite of Our
is no doubt a direct result of the meager amount
ender the awe-inspiring make-up worn by said
sad waste, considering one of the side themes
I dignify it with that word?) is that conserva-
iost importance.
are viewer might be tipped off to the gory na-
ie by the newspaper blurb; "Eighteen feet of
ban-eating terror!" However, the feeble hopes
ispensful version of a Walt Disney's Mommy
dorrable Cubs" were quite effectively quashed
he s vid and beautiful photography characteris-
atsre films is lacking.
ined by scenery worthy of a travelogue as a
he opening credits; thereafter the siightly myo-
«w (or the producer's idea of same) is the order
ews that one simply cannot have attractive
sceneit. Pity; it might have been the film's
, exiise me, I overestimate the power of na-
It is doubtful whether a National Geographic
er'iie could have lent distinction to the footing.
lock of aesthetics is no serious lack when one
riiarc parpose of this film. Violence! Yes,
A rsidimentary plot was plucked from Reader's
Trtie Personal Accounts", embellished with a
d siily an unexpected lack of mannequins and
sled this from turning into an epic. Lack of
song cast members posed no problems.
re some truly outstanding moments; the bear
certainly deserves some applause for his footwork (after all it
is tiresome to have to run over the same piece of ground in-
numerable times for endless, identical chase scenes) and even
more respect for his taste in remaining stubbornly, persistently
aloof. One might question his judgement in getting mixed up
with the surprisingly pernicious characters assembled here, but
he certainly redeems himself by eradicating as many of them as
quickly and painfully as possible.
'Of course, there a moot point presents itself-can store-
window dummies feel pain? Propriety demanded some external
sign that his presence graced the set; unfortunately most of his
appearances had the full, rounded character of a vaudeville
cane. For that matter, it was suggested that the bear might
be a rather large, fur-covered cane with claws firmly attached
(don't forget that this is "Jaws With Claws!") wielded by an
enterprising stunt man. The exigencies of the role demanded but
that the stunt man be moderately well-muscled; he had to snake
out the aforementioned cane and with Vicious Slashing Ferocity
grab the actresses off the screen. Considering the mentality of
the movie it might have been simplier to move the scenery from
under the actress, with actress and "Vicious Slashing Append-
age" held securely stationary so they couldn't hurt themselves
accidentally. Then the ketchup man could take over safely.
Kudos were also deserved by two other cast members; Our
Hero (you'll recognise him by his square jaw, tanned lean look,
and cigarette), and the Porcine Bureaucratic Park Superinten-
dent, who is bent upon foiling Our Hero's efforts while ensconc-
ed in his palatial villa. Even though and I know that this bear
is definitely not interested in ill-distributed adipose, he certainly
intends to take no unnecessary chances by going out in those
nasty nasty woods. These two presented the most realistic por-
trayals of total incompetents I have seen in a long time. Our
Hero, admittedly, (and I have this on good authority-the mana-
ger of the theater kindly filled me in on the vestigial plot be-
cause I had to leave due to an engagement at the Christian Sci-
ence Reading Room, catching up on hot bookplates) does end up
killing the bear. Unfortunately he does this before the bear gets
a chance at the Superintendent or the Pert Little Photographer
who is his true love.
One would think that the Hero, at least, would recognize a
good work when he saw it and even further its cause with a
little misplaced shotgun fire, but no. In this, the movie fails to
give spiritual refreshment to the audience. And spiritual re-
freshment is sorely needed. The two underheros - a naturalist
fond of trotting about the woods munching bologna sandwiches
draped in a deerskin and a helicopter pilot whose makeup pre-
cedes him into the room - are both, sadly enough, bumped off.
The hero, understandably, is crushed. Soon he will have to
resort to cutting in shots of Elmer Fudd trotting through the
woods singing "A-Bunting We Will Go" but since Comic Re-
lief has always played a poor second to Fear of Being Upstaged
By a Brighter Talent, he somehow faces up to his sorrow in the
best heroic fashion - silently. This appalling paucity of dialogue
is indeed a vital characteristic of the film. By cutting out un-
necessary exchange we appreciate all the more the inspired
snorts of the Grizzly. (Or could it be a misplaced sound track
from a pudgy camper's picnic?) For that matter, one wonders
whether words as a means of communication is an idea whose
time has yet to come in the minds of the producer and director.
It is questionable also whether the caliber of the cast could
have supported dialogue. They were heavy taxed with such de-
manding exchanges as "Over fifteen feet tall? Ha ha ha ha!"
and "This bear is in your sector, Kelly-you take care of it."
See 'GRIZZLY', Page 5
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