Page Four

I HE MICHIGAN DAILY

Sunday, April 1, 1973

Page Four IHE~ MICHIGAN L~AILY



By MIKE HARPER
and KEN ALTSHULER
. It all started innocently
enough.
Two weeks ago while investi-
gating the possibility of a Bea-
tles' reunion for a then-upcom-
ing "Okie and Jethro . . ." col-
umn, we decided to seek further
help in our quest by calling Ap-
ple Records in the hope that
they could add more to what, at
the time, seemed like sketchy
rumors and nothing more.
That trans-Atlantic phone call
-which will now be told in full
detail - was the beginning of a
grim story; a story so shocking
that its full effects have still not
been realized, and perhaps nev-
er will be in our time.
The phone call-
"Hullo . . . Apple Records,
INK .Can I hulpyou .
"Ahyes, hello. This is Ken Alt-
shuler and Mike Harper calling
from Ann Arbor, Michigan U. S.
A. and we were wondering if you
could help us with some infor-
mation on this so-called 'reunion'
of the Beatles in Los Ange-
les . .?"
"Wait a second . . . you want
to talk to someone in public re-
lations . ."
After a few seconds' wait,
someone came back on the
phone . .
"Hullo. This is Edward Aul-
den James, PR. Can I hulp
you?"
"Ah, yes. We're calling from
the United States, and we're
writing a newspaper article on
the possibility of a Beatles' re-
union and, well, we were won-
dering if you could help us with
some of the details . .."
At first, James was extreme-
ly helpful - yes, it was true that
Ringo was recording an album
in L.A., and yes, it was true
that John and George had stop-
ped in to play on a few tracks,
and yes, it was also true that
they might officially get back
together and so on - but his
answers were always very for-
tonight
6:00 2 60 Minutes
4 News
7 Movie
"Batman" (1966)
9 1 Dream of Jeannie
S0Lawrence welk
56 Movie
"Two Daughters" (1962)
6:30 4 NBC News
9 Tom Jones
7:00 2 TV 2 Reports
4 George Plerrot
50,NHL Hockey
7:30 4 World of Disney
7 Police Surgeon
9 Canada: Five Portrait
8:00 M*A*S*H
7 FBI
56 An American Family
8:30 2 Mannix
4 McMillan and Wife
9 Oxford-Cambridge Boat Race
9:00 7 Movie
"Grand Slam" (Italian 1967)
9 Purple Playhouse
5 Masterpiece Theatre
9:30 2 Barnaby Jones
30 Mancin Generation
10:00 4 Escape
9 Weekend
56 FirIng Line

Are
mal and a bit on the 'rehearsed'
side of things.
To "break the ice," we decid-
ed to make an attempt at a joke,
hoping that James would relax
a little, and perhaps get a bit
more personal as well .;.
"Well Mister James, at least
we know Paul won't be there (in
L.A.)"
"Huh?"
"Why he's dead, didn't you
know? There were stories about
"the walrus"' death in all the
papers .. .
"Ah Mike, John was the wal-
rus, not Paul . ..
"Well, then it's John who
won't make it then, right Mister
James? . . . Mister James? Hel-
lo, are you still there?"
. he didn't loosen up.
Telling us to hold on in a dead-
ly serious tone, James literally
left us hanging on proverbial ice
for almost a full minute, per-
haps a little less, before he re-
turned to the phone. During his
absence, we heard numerous
clicking noises that sounded like
someone picking up a phone re-
ceiver, and it was then that we
realized that our phone conver-
sation was being monitored by
a few if not several others . . .
When James did return, his
voice cracked noticeably, as he
then proceeded to direct the con-
versation elsewhere - had we
ever been to England (?), what
was it like to live in America
(?), how was the weather over
here (?) and so on. He seemed
to be searching for something,
anything to say . .. and failing
miserably.
"Ah Mister James, is some-
thing wrong... ?
"W r o n g ? What could be
50 Lou Gordon
4 Profiles in Black
11:00 2 4 News
9 CBC News
11:15 9 Nation's Business
11:20 9 Religious Scope
11:30 2 Movie
"Assignment K" (English
1968)
4 Big Valley
7 News
9 Movie
"Tell Them Willie Boy
Is Here" (1969)
50 For My People
12:00 7 ABC News
12:15 7 Movie
"The Young Lawyers" (1969)
12:30 4 News
1:30 2 Movie
"Journey to the Center of
Time" (1967)
2:15 7 News
3:00 2 News

ILL
wrong, huh? (nervous laugh-
ter) Say, why don't you give me
your names and addresses and
I'll send you a couple of free
records, okay?"
"Ah, well; okay . . . but what
about the Beatles? Are they -
or aren't they - getting back
together . . .? Anything at all
would be helpful."
"Say, how would you like
some autographed pictures of
them . .?"

(he

Bea ties

John

"The Beatles . ..?
"Yeah."
"Sure. That'd be g r e a t
but..."
"Oh, I'm sorry . . . I gotta go
now . . . I'm wanted by one of
the 'wheels.' Say, give your
names and addresses to the sec-
retary and I'll make sure you
get some su-per things ..."
"Ah Mister James? Mister
James? Mister James!"
After we gave the secretary
our names, and she again pro-
mised us 'something su-per'
for our good faith,' we were fin-
ally able to make out another
noise that we had heard every
few seconds since James' return
to the phone - it was the
the squeeking sound you hear
when the tape snags slightly on,
a reel-to-reel tape recorder.
.. , A tape recorder? This was
beginning to seem like some old,
out-dated 'B' movie with spies
and fast cars and women and
secrets . . . Secrets? Perhaps.
. . . Perhaps indeed. Just
maybe James did have some-
thing to hide - 'something'
that we had accidentally stumb-
led on to without realizing it ...
but what?
By now, thanks to the seem-
ingly fragile nerves of one Ed-
ward Aulden James, we more
than 'just' curious - we were
after the truth, no matter how
shocking it might prove, and at
anv cost.
Willing to. try again, we de-
cided to call Michael-Thomas
Hartley, a staff engineer at Ap-
ple, and a good friend of Ken-
ny's older brother, Henry Da-
vid. After disguising his voice to
get through the switchboard,
Kenny tricked Hartley into be-
lieving that James had told him

of John Lennon's death. After
we promised (we had our fing-
ers crossed though . . .) never
to tell anyone, Hartley told all,
saying it was best that "we got
the details all-straight."
. . . We will now relate Mi-
chael-Thomas Hartley's tragic
tale to you, and a utterly shock-
ing tale it is.
To put it most bluntly, not on-
ly are the song - writing team
of Lennon - McCartney both
dead, but George and Ringo as
well. ALL FOUR BEATLES
HAVE BEEN DEAD FOR
MORE THAN SIX YEARS!
Amazing - then sad - but true.
. . . Since the raw shock of
these later - documented facts
has perhaps worn off by now,
we can further elaborate on
11 a r t 1 e y ' s conscience-
saving 'confession,' righting the
world to what was perhaps the
best-kept secret of modern
times.
-.. .And whether we are sued
for the cruel, hard truth, or we
are 'done away with,' or even
less likely, we go down in mod-
ern annals for our conscious ef-
forts in the field of newspaper
reporting, we now must relate
this story to you for one simple,
honest reason - be there 'risk'
or not, we are journalists first
and foremost; it is our chosen
duty to report the truth, no mat-
ter how disheartening - and
'costly' to our own personal
safety as well - it may indeed
prove to be.
First-of-all, those 'rumors'
concerning P a u 1 ' s 'sup-
posed' death a few years back
were not started by a midwest-
ern college student as most, if
not all, of those 'concerned' had
been led to believe.
. . . Without getting permis-
sion to do so, a young executive
secretary at Apple Records, a
Miss Chris Reaser, let certain
information 'leak' to the Ameri-
can press, thus hoping that
someone would stumble onto the
grave truth and her guilt-ridden
conscience would be saved from
any further mental anguish.
Sending an unsigned letter to an
editor of a small rock news-
letter The 'Sound' Barrier,
Miss Reaser told him of 'strange'
clues she had found on the
Beatles' album Magical Mystery
Tour, clues that pointed to the
death of bassist Paul McCartney.
While the editor was calling a
press conference to relate 'his'
discovery; M i s s Reaser was
missing from work; in fact, ac-
cording to Hartley, she was
never seen again in the Apple
offices. As the story goes, she
just 'disappeared.'
To return directly to the
story: as the clues told, Paul
Oid indeed die in a car acci-
dent back in 1966, but § John
"blew his mind out in a car" as
well; the same car in fact. Yes,
John and Paul both perished In
a car accident, an accident that
was successfully covered up In
all reality until now.

. . . But John and Paul were
not the first Beatles to die -
Ringo Starr, nee Richard Stark-
ey, had drowned the year before
in a tragic accident while film-
ing the movie Help!
While they were busily filming
outdoor scenes for the film,
Ringo wandered too far out into
the ocean, and he was swept
away by the giant waves . . . his
body never found! The rest of
the group and their mentor Brian
Epstein swore the cast and crew
to secrecy, and a search w a s
quickly undertaken for a "suit-
able replacement."
. . . It was at this early time
that Epstein began to groom
four more young men to replace
the Beatles . . . just in case they
- the 'fab four' minus one -
met with any more tragedy, that
is. As a forethought, this proved
to be an absolute stroke of gen-
ius, for within a year, Lennon
'and McCartney were to die in a
gruesome car-truck crash, leav-
ing George Harrison as the lone
remaining 'original' Beatle.
Somehow able to cover up the
story of all this tragedy at first,
Beatle Harison learned how to
play all of the group's basic in-
struments and, with the help of
a band called the Iveys (who lat-
er changed their name to Bad-
finger), he went into the studio
to record what turned out to be

lfead?)
Beatles were suddenly more po-
pular than ever!
. . . Knowing they couldn't go
on fooling the public forever,
Apple decided to break up the
Beatles themselves . . . by any
means possible.
A few years back, a plan
to turn people against the Beatles
by having the 'phony' John say
that the group was more popu-
lar than Jesus had failed. At
first, people were repulsed, but
in the end the Beatles were per-
haps even more popular than
they had been before the trick.

the Apple number and asked for
Michael-Thomas, only to have
the secretary tell us that "no
such person was working - or
had ever worked- for Apple
Records . . ." "No, sorry. Never
'eard of 'im."
So it seemed that Hartley
had 'disappeared' as well.
Knowing him to be a very hon-
est, very logical.person, we knew
that Michael-Thomas - Hartley
was by no means the type of man
who would make up such a shock-
ing story and lie to us. Hope-
fully, you will believe ours' as
well .
... We have no real proof of
these deaths though, for our
source has 'disappeared' just as
Miss Reaser did, perhaps as
many others have as well. Per-
haps, we will 'disappear' too.

Shop at
FOLLETTS

3
i ARTS
wLa
f
I

Sound System
Problems?
a type recorder
weekend without
sound.. .
IS THIS WHAT'S
BOTHERING YOU,
LOVER? TRUST US.
TAPE RECORDER
SPECIALISTS INC.
is the best Audio Service Com-
pany in Woshtenaw County and
we're located right here in Ann
Arbor. Be it a tape recorder,
amplifier, or a high quality FM
tuner, you can expect the best
from TRS. For estabtished qual-
ity repair service, backed by a
full 90-day warranty, see us at
300 S. Thaver St. in the Bell
Tower Hotel across from the
side of Hill Auditorium.
OR CALL
663.4152

i

Trying another angle this time,
a young avant-garde poet named
Yoko Ono was groomed to come
in and 'supposedly' have John
- fall in love with her, thus John's
first marriage would be shot and
the iner tensions between Yoko
one the other members of the
group would cause the Beatles to
break up. And thus, no more lies
and deceptions. And no more
Beatles.
...It worked beautifully, as
Yoko 'supposedly' caused John
and Paul to break ties, and thus
the song writers could no longer
exist together . . . so they exist-
ed apart.
Separating to various parts of
the world so that it would be
harder to keep tabs on all four
of them, the replacements be-
came recluses of sorts, t h u s
letting the Beatles' "dream" -
a dream the "phony" John had
sung about as being "over" -
die a slow death, dying quite
gradually, so as not to arouse
any great deal of suspicion from
their fans or the press.
. . . Yet in our minds, John,
Pa'l, George and Ringo were
still as real as many of you must
still believe. When they began
making separate public appear-
ances again, the 'new' Beatles
were once again thrilling their
fans and perhaps, as well, con-
stant reader who, if he or she is
like us, was just "dying" to see
them again . . . in any form.
And "any form" is what we got.
. '. .As Hartley began to give
specific proof of the deaths-
namely, the "clues" on the al-
bum covers and in the music it-
self - the phone connection sud-
denly went dead, so we re-dialed

Perhaps not. In any case, our
story - the Beatles story can-
not just be tossed 'aside as are
so many others, for 'this' may
well be the greatest story ever
told; a story left unanswered but
never untold, a story that
"dreams" were once made of.

for TEXTBOOKS,
TRADEBOOKS,
and SUPPLIES

R. C. PLAYERS present
THE THREE SISTERS
by ANTON CHEKHOV
Directed by DOUG SPRIGG
APRIL 4 - 7 at 8:00
MATINEE: SATURDAY, APRIL 7 at 2:00
EAST QUAD AUDITORIUM
ADMISSION $1.25
Tickets on sale Tuesday, April 3 from 3:00-5:00 p.m. and
one hour before each performance
MACKINAC.
JACK'S
(under new management)
MUSIC 7 DAYS A WEEK


6:00 2
9
50
56
6:30 2
4
7
9
50
56
7:00 2
4
7
50
56

MONDAY
4 7 News
Courtship of Eddie's Father
Flintstones
Operation second Chance
NBC ews
ABS News
I Dream of Jeannie
Gilligan's Island
360 Degrees
Truth or Consequences
News
To Tell The Truth
Beverly Hillbillies
I Love Lucy
Passion, Death and Resur-
rection of Jesus
See TV, Page 7

George
the album Revolver. Doing all
but the vocals, Harrison seemed
if a bit strained at his chosen
task, but suddenly one -day he
just took off, leaving the Iveys
and George Martin to finish the
album.
Three days later, word reached
Apple that George had commit-
ted suicide, dying in the arms of
the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi,
somewhere in far off mystical
India. The tragedy continued to
spread.George died of a Krish-
na overdose.
. . . After the 'new' studio
band had created the masterpiece
known as Sgt. Pepper's Lonely
Hearts Club Band, an 'unfortun-
ate' result came about - the

4

TONIGHT-TUES.
APRIL 1 2, 3
APRIL 4, 5,.6, 7
OPEN 8 P.M.

BIZARRO
LIGHTN IN'
PHONE 761-6455

SC U L"TfURE C A LEN D AR
FILM-Cinema Guild shows Bertolucci's Before the Revo-
lution; in Arch. Aud. at 7 and 9:05; Cinema II presents
Rossen's The Hustler at 7 and 9:30 in Aud. A.
DANCE-U Musical Society presents the National Ballet
Company in Tchaikovsky's Sleeping Beauty at Power at
3 and 8.
ART-Pyramid Gallery gives an opening reception 4 to 6
p.m. for an artists Anthony DeBlasi, Sheldon Iden, Rog-
er Mayer, Charles McGee, David Rubello, David Tam-
many, and Irving Taran, whose works will be exhibited.
MUSIC SCHOOL-MONDAY-Composers Forum at 8 pm in
the Recital Hall.

E
7ew cene
THURSDAY NIGHT:
TEQUILLA NIGHT

341 SOUTH MAIN

769-5960


HER
written by NEIL SIMON
directed by ELAINE MAY
-NEXT-
Borbra Streisand
in "UP THE SANDBOX"

TONIGHT--APRIL 1st
A gorgeous film by the maker of LAST TANGO IN PARIS
Bernardo Bertoluccis
BEORE THE
RVOLTO
Written by Bertolucci
Andriona Arti, Francesco Barilli, AlIea Midgette
"REVOLUTION": The work of a man with great promise
THE New York Film Festival Stendhal character; residing in ure at love symbolizes a death of
is still capable of surprises. Parma and ultimately marrying a the past, an angst-ridden sense
Last night, Philharmonic Hall bourgeois girl named Clelia. He of fultility in any kind of revo-
presented "Before the Revolu- is also an Italian Holden Caul- lutionary striving, whether emo-
tion," an unheralded Italian fea- field, flailing his adolescent tional, political or merely Intel-
ture by an unknown writer-di- limbs and querying intellect lectual, amid the defeat of con-
rector named Bernardo Bertoluc- against the social structures of temporary society.
ci. He is 23 years old, and his 1962.
film is a beauty. Viewing life in such romantic
The title derives from Talley- terms is the special province of
So is its star. Adriana Asti, a rand - "Only those who lived a very young director, but Mr.
large-eyed brunette making her before the revolution knew how Bertolucci has approached his
celluloid debut, appeared on- sweet life could be." In a typi- story with such deep feeling that
stage with the director to take cal gesture of searching youth, its full implications are corn
a modest bow before the screen- the boy revolts against: every- municated. This is a young
ing. Her unfamiliar face meant thing , in his surroundings-his man's film, but it has large so-
little to the audience at the respectable middle-class family, cial references.
time. Before the evening was ov- his lovely but dull childhood
er, it had become a face. that sweetheart,, the political climate Cinematically, it is also filled
discerning film-goers are unlike- in his provincial town. He dallies with references, to the best mo-
ly to forget, with Communism, with abstract dern directors in Italy and
philosophy, with 'art, and, most France. Knowledgeable viewers
She is the focal point of a meaningfully, with his striking, can detect strong influences from
poignant love story epitomizing unhappy young aunt who falls Roberto Rossellini and Alain Res-
a young man's growth through hopelessly in love while realiz- nais in Mr. Bertolucci's sophis-
the dense, chaotic jungle of con- ing she is only filling an adoles- ticated style.
temporary civilization. L i k e cent's temporary need.
many of the best modern films. Astonishingly, he has managed
the drama is difficult, subtle It is a 'moving story on the to assimilate a high degree of
and extraordinarily complex in most immediate level, and the filmic and literary erudition into
its imagery. director has given it sweeping a distinctively personal visual ap-

a

al

TUESDAY, APRIL 3
The International Center Presents
SYLVIA WYNTER
Visiting Professor from
the University of the West Indies
SPEAKING ON:
"REVOLUTION AND CHANGE
IN THE. THIRD WORLD"

..
M
{
tr!
k

Sat., Sun., & Wed. at
1,3 5 7, 9
Mon., Tues., Thur., Fri. at
7 pm. & 9 p.m. Only
INGMAR BERGMAN'S
CRIESANDUr
WHbQ.PE~RS\


I

in { UlEU," I=

m

F I