a special feature the s unduy daily suicides on campus $1 11 Number 72 Page Four Sunday, January 21, 1973 of q Suici e: Yea, I'm gonna kill myself, get a little headline news. I'd like to see what the papers say on the state of teenage blues. By KATHLEEN RICKE "j WAS SITTING at dinner when the feeling came. I'd had it for a long time, but it seemed to be get- ting a lot worse lately. Spreading up from my stomach it filled my chest and made my head pound with those noises. I knew I was going to die be- cause .it was choking me. I couldn't stand it any longer, so I got up from the table, put on my coat and started out for the store. I'd been putting off buying the pills, but I know I couldn't any longer. I knew I had to die and it was time. "I remember walking to the drug store. It was about a mile away, but it seemed so close. I tried to make the time last longer because once I had the pills I couldn't put it off any- more. It was strange watching the people because everyone looked like ' the same leering face screaming at me - I guess I was screaming from the inside - and I was the only one who could hear myself. "I bought the pills and swallowed them. Then I laid down in an alley and started to cry. I knew that I didn't want to die, but it seemed like the only answer. My body start- ed to feel funny-blood was rushing The will to live, the will to die Y to my head and pounding. my heart was I got up and started walking. After three blocks I couldn't find a phone booth and the rushes were all over. My body started running pretty frantically but my mind felt so cool, like I was laying in a stream with the water flowing over me. "Suddenly I could hear a siren real close and people standing all around me. Then cold sheets and rough hands. It was horrible, almost as bad as the days before it." PEOPLE ASK what could possibly make a person want to die badly enough to take forty sleeping pills, to slit their wrists or head with a razor sharp blade, to tie their belt around their own neck and choke the life out. Yet, 70,000 Americans commit sui- cide every year, and half of these are college students or college age people. The most disturbing thing about the growing number of suicides on campuses is that they're being ig- nored. Most people aren't aware of the problem unless it affects their own life, or the life of a friend. Many university offices are reluctant to even discuss the problem. grades - the pressures to do well and go on to graduate school. The crowds of people who always seem to be hurrying somewhere. Often it seems there is no time to notice someone walking across the Diag with tears running down his or her face, or just a sad, dejected walk. One girl said that she hadn't realized how bad the apathy was here until she fell on the ice, laid there a few minutes, while no one offered to help herup, or even seemed to notice that she'd fallen. Another student spoke of a suicide that occurred in the apartment next door during the summer. She hadn't noticed anything "wrong" with her neighbor until one morning when she heard a gun blast and saw the blood oozing into the hallway. Dr. Edward Bordin of the Counsel- ling Center says suicides and suicide attempts among college students are seasonal in that they occur primar- ily between October and April, peak- ing just after school starts and dur- ing exam periods. He believes that ages 18 to 22 are unsettled times in many people's lives, and that de- pression often occurs as a result of low self esteem in school and in so- cial affairs. DEPRESSION, loneliness guilt, list- lessness. We all have these feelings sometimes. But when they linger for weeks or even months at a time the result can be suicide. Depression often becomes so severe that in interferes with everyday func- tions. Sleep doesn't come easily. Meals are forgotten or ignored because of gnawing pangs of nervousness in the stomach. Night becomes a dreaded time to be left alone with the fear and the helplessness. People find many ways of coping with depression. Sometimes a phone call to a friend or a crisis center makes the night pass more quickly. Tranquilizers and sleeping pills can calm the mind for a few hours. Some try to get rid of the pain by writing suicide letters to friends and family. "Dear Sue, I can't help it, I want to die-Love, Jeff." And unfortunately some escape the pain by cutting it out with a knife, or a gun, or pills. RECORDS SHOW that most unsuc- cessful suicide attempts are made by women and the most common method is drug overdose. Most suicides are committed by men, a large percentage of them blow- ing their heads open with guns. Psychiatrists and psychologists have all kinds of theories on what causes suicides, but it is evident from talk- ing to those who have tried that they really don't want to die. The wish for death is coupled with an equally strong desire to live. Depending on the circumstances, one drive will win out. It of course ultimately depends on one's own action, but often suicides can be prevented if the turmoil can be relieved. The sad aspect is that almost all suicides are predictable. People us- ually leave very clear-cut signs of their intent. Many suicides are preceded by at least one other attempt. Lack of sleep, loss of appetite, loss of incen- tive or energy, depression, and hints like "I wish I was dead," "When I'm gone" and "I won't need this any more" often are made before suicide is attempted. I'm getting bored being part of mankind, there's not a lot to do no more, this race is a waste of time. DEPRESSION CAN breed fear of others, and fear of oneself. It is are familiar enough with this problem to deal with it, and realize the ser- iousness of even a threat to commit suicide. Ethel Sechs, a counselor at the Uni- versity Health Service, speaks of her encounters with students contem- plating suicide, "It scares us to death, and we take it very seriously here." Dr. John Hartman of the Neuro- Psychiatric Institute says that when cases of a t t e m p t e d suicide are brought to the Institute, the immedi- ate fate of the individual is up to the psychiatrist on duty. If the doc- tor j u d g e s the case to be severe enough for hospitalization, the per- son might be admitted. If it seems that the attemptee is in better spirits after medical treat- ment, he or she is ofen sent home. Unfortunately, in many cases a later your problems over with someone, and to get information on problem preg- nancy counselling. The Women's Crisis Center number is 761-9473. The Department of Social Services can be helpful, especially in cases of child abuse. Catholic Social Services is becoming more active in community problems, and the Red Cross offero a counselling service, especially for servicemen, The University has a service for students at 1007 E. Huron Street that does both long and short term coun- selling. In instances of actual suicide at- tempts Hartman recommends t h e Neuro-Psychiatric Institute in Uni- versity Hospital's emergency clinic. ,I .I photography by randy edmonds r.. emsumeiise sm :">iim sss amimsam i ussilisa msam saae iI Dave Patch, the director of 76- GUIDE, a university run counselling service, said that he "hadn't heard of student suicide in five or six years." While the county has records of sev- en University student suicides in 1972 alone. The seven suicides do not include deaths that are recorded "reason un- determined", "drug overdose", "car ran off the road", "shotgun wound-- not determined as homicide." Nor do they include countless attempts that are treated or neglected every day. Statistics also ignore a counselors recognize - students who drop out of; mit suicide soon after. fact some that many school com- People rushing everywhere, swarming round like flies, think I'll buy a forty-four, give 'em all a surprise. A COLLEGE TOWN like Ann Arbor has an atmosphere that easily breeds depression. The competitive- ness between students to get the bet A friend can sometimes help ease the crisis attempt is more successful. Hospialization is often very helpful if the doctors and attendants are un- derstanding and treat patients like human beings. But hospitalization doesn't always prevent more suicide attempts. For example, in one month at Ypsilanti State Hospital there were two in-patient suicides. There are sometimes long waiting lists to get a bed in a psychiatric ward largely due to the public's pathetic indifference, lack of awareness and reluctance to approve state funding. LOCAL FACILITIES for help during personal crisis and other problems have expanded greatly during the past two years. The 24 hour Crisis Walk-in Center at 212 S.- Fourth Street is the center fnr rnmmm , nitmpnttu r P hees U Think I'mn gonna kill myself, cause a little suicide, stick around for a couple of days, what a scandal if I died. THE CONCEPT of suicide is com- plex, and the magnitude is fright- ening. The feelings are something we all experience at times and would like to forget, but perhaps are best not forgotten. Ignoring the unpleasant- ness has done nothing but isolate and alienate the people who need help the most. Because the majority of suicides are preceded by cries for help, there is still a lingering hope for life. A friend can grab hold of that hope, making the crisis less lonely and the feelings less desperate. The University's role in students' health care should include a realiza- ,I x I