Wednesday, May 7, 1969
THE MICHIGAN DAILY
Wednesday, May 7, *I 969 THE MICHIGAN DAILY
,: rage
The Texas Wedge'
EDITOR'S NOTE: Mr. Bogema is writing these columns to pay off
a gin debt to the Summer Sports Editor. Mr. Bogema lost by 864
points at a half-penny per point. In place of paying $4.32 Mr. Bogema
has chosen to write 864 Texas Wedges of which the following is the
first. Your advice as to whether Mr. Bogema should pay off the debt
or write 863 more columns would be appreciated.)
By DREW BOGEMA
I once had a double-eagle.
Really.
Now you can toss this off as absurd boasting by one of those
fools that kills time by writing stupid stories on campus sports.
But I'm not on The Daily. The paper is run by a right-wing
clique of well-renowned fascists. Argus is where it's at. And I
hate sports. So there.
I spent the greater part of my second decade of life in
Westland, formerly Nankin Township, a suburban outgrowth of
Livonla, the shopping-center capitol of the world. The major
-attraction of living within a suburb of a suburb is leaving. The
highways are flooded every morning with commuters chanting,
rafing, screaming in ecstatic joy, "I'm out! I'm out!" The Bimbo
adage of "every time a baby's born, somebody leaves town" fits
Hawthorne Valley like a tee.
HAWTHORNE VALLEY was the name of both the subdivi-
sion I lived in and the golf course that bordered on my old mans
yard. The course had once enjoyed national prominence (the
Walker Cup tournament was held there in the 20's, I was told
by the old codger who ran the pro shop, but that's another
story)., lut since Hitler's War its clientele had changed from
Ford execulives to GM wage-slaves. Thirty-six championship
holes had been sliced into the Edward Hines Parkway and a
subdivision of Hotchkiss homes, leaving a few acres for a nine-
hole wonder that a pro could easily card a twenty-nine on. The
scratch amateurs in the neighborhood called it a pitch-'n'-putt.
I detested school. and as everyone who made it to the 'U'
knows, it takes about two weeks of rigorous, intensive concen-
tration in the 6th grade to learn the rules and ropes of academic
games, making it easy as pie the rest of the way through. Hence,
the golf course. And so on.
THE FIRST DAY I noticed the course was in March of
1957. My parents had moved from Allen Park a month before.
Little white spheres with dents and scratches on them (I was
later to learn that these were called "smiles" by golf fiends-an
indication of their love of the game) -kept dropping out of the
sky. I collected ten the first day. Only later would I discover
that a hooked drive from the seventh tee would land someone's
ball in my father's bean patch.
So I began collecting them. After a month I had a basket-
ful. I also began to learn how to master the essentials of golf:
a skill that has made me what I am today. Today, I haven't
. played golf in two years. I hate the sport. I hate all sports.
I started selling these tiny-white spheres to cheap wage-
slave hacks that offered 75c for brand-new Titlists or Spalding
Dots. I didn't know they were wage-slaves then. All I knew was
that they wore blue work shirts, baggy trousers, cheap hush-
puppy golf shoes, and carried their clubs on carts which they
pulled behind them. Having read a few issues of Golf Digest, I
knew they were scarcely of the avante-garde.
But they were wise. When they bought new balls from the
pro-shop at a buck and a quarter a ball, they'd slash it up
before they were off the first tee. Now they'd slash someone
else's up before they were off the seventh tee, and chances were,
if they hit it at all, it would land right back in my old man's
bean patch.
I MADE A FORTUNE, almost as much as the McKenzie
bitch who operated a lemonade stand on the 6th tee, where
golfers, after ascending a fifty-foot incline, would eagerly
swallow the 10cc- cup of liquid that tasted exactly like the pol-
luted water from the Rouge River, flavored with acorn stems.
The reason why she was a bitch was because once I started a
Kool-Aid stand on the fifth tee, and she had her hoody brothers
destroy my stand, toss my Kool-Aid into the river, and beat
me up. A
The McKenzie girl made $5000 in ten years, enough to pay
for her college education. Except that she was dumber than an
ox. She dropped out of school after the eleventh grade, marry-
ing some hood she had been pregnant by. So it goes.
After learning the ropes of golf and of the course, my
friends and I summoned up our courage and began sneaking on
the seventh tee after supper. We would play the back three as
rapidly as possible, often hitting three or four balls at a time
and, by the time we had finished the ninth, the first tee would
be clear, for the whole course was empty. Everyone else was in
the bar groaning to each other of the horror of being a Ford
wage-slave. This was happiness.
Next: Bozo's terror, or in fear of a wop-driven-jeep.
Gridder s
impressive
in final
practice
By JIM FORRESTER
Summer Sports Editor
Berutti a chance to display their
wares.
They could be loaded. That's the But the biggest question mark
feeling one got watching the of the day was Doughty, New
Michigan football team in the Wolverine head coach Glenn E.
Stadium yesterday as the "Blue" "Bo" Schembechler is expecting
squad defeated the "White," 23-7 the fleet sophomore to at least
in the final spring scrimmage. partially fill the departed shoes
Don Moorhead, the junior quar- of record breaking Ron Johnson
terback who spent most of last even though Doughty has never,
season collecting splinters as grad- run out of the backfield before.
uated Denny Brown led the Big "Glenn has all the speed in the
Ten in total offense, sparked the world," commented Schembechler,
"Blue" attack as he passed for two "but absolutely no experience. At
touchdowns and ran for another in present he tends to stutter step at
the first string-second string clash. the line of scrimmage and will
The first scoring toss was to need plenty of work to be ready
Glenn Doughty, the man who must for Vanderbilt." Even with these
replace Ron Johnson, for two obstacles facing him, the new
yards to cap a 56 yard scoring coach was confident about his
drive. Moorhead ran and passed novice back's ability, "Unless I
well, collecting 54 yards in 15 car- don't know anything about foot-
ries while completing seven of ball, he can do the job.".
eight passes for 80 more yards, Moorhead scored on a six yard
until he was taken out of the run as he rolled out to pass with
practice to give Jim Betts and Bill only 2:31 left in the first half.
,ii
I
i
daily
sports
NIGHT EDITOR'
JIM FORRESTER
i
This Week in Sports
TOMORROW
TENNIS-Notre Dame at Ferry Field, 2:00 p.m.
FRIDAY
BASEBALL-Wisconsin at Ferry Field (2), 1:00 p.m.
GOLF-Spartan Invitational at East Lansing
TENNIS-Indiana at Ferry Field, 2:00 p.m.
SATURDAY
BASEBALL-Northwestern at Ferry Field (2), 1:00 p.m.
GOLF-Spartan Invitational at East Lansing
TENNIS-Ohio State at Ferry Field, 1:00 p.m.
TRACK-Michigan State at East Lansing
I
.
The drive, which began on the
"Blue" 33. featured a 17 yard
jaunt by wing back Paul Staroba.
But as Staroba was brought to
the turf he snapped his collar
bone and will be inactive for the
The play which netted Staroba
his long gain is part of the "belly"
series which Schembechler calls
"the only real change from last
year's Michigan offense." Staroba's
play came off a fake to fullback
Garvie Craw and then a hand-off
to the wing back.
Garvie Craw played a strong
game lugging the ball eleven times
to collect 54 yards. The new of-
fense calls for the fullback to run
quite a bit and Schembechler ha's
been pleased with Craw's progress
as a runner but feels his blocking,
has suffered, "Last year Garvie
was one of the best blocking backs
in the country but now that we;
have given him the ball more his
bocking hasn't been as good. I'll
have to get on him about that."
The final "Blue" touchdown
came as Don Moorhead fired a 26
yard pass to tight end Jim Man-
dich running the post pattern.
Schembeohler calls Mandich "A
MICHIGAN FULLBACK Garvie Craw is brought down by two "White" squad linemen during yester-
day's scrimmage at the Michigan Stadium. Craw's teammate Jerry Imsland (86) is also shown throw-
ing a block into Mark Werner (49). Craw, a senior out of Montclair, N.J., carried the ball 11 times
for 54 yards during the "Blue" team's 23-7 triumph over their "White" teammates.
pleasure to coach. fou don't have Both were all-Big Ten selections suffered a knee injury last Th
to push him - he is always push- last season. day. But all things taken into
ing himself. Mandich is a genuine The "Blue" tallied its final sideration the spring was as
All-America candidate." points as Tim Killian, a linebacker as it could have been."
Schembechler also lists defensive switched to center, booted a 45
back Toni Curtis and offensive yard field goal to the amazement
tackle Dan Dierdorf as having and pleasure of the few fans that
good chances at national honors. turned out for the scrimmage.
BASEBALL ROUNDUP:
Pinch hit home run pulls Royals by Tigers
i
'i
,,
4
By The Associated Press Piniella 'alked. McLain fanned
DETROIT - Pinch hitter Hawk Joe Foy but Bob Oliver's single
Taylor greeted reliever Dick Ra- filled the bases, one run crossed
datz with a towering three-run on Jerry Adair's infield out and
homer with two out in the ninth Chuck Harrison singled in an-
inning, capping a, five-run explo- other.
sion that powered the expansion Radatz replaced McLain and
Kansas City Royals past Detroit Taylor. batting for Juan Rios,
7-6 last night. walloped his second homer of 'the
Tiger ace Denny McLain was season into the upper left field
working on a five-hitter and a 6-2
lead but Ed Kirkpatrick opened stands, sending the Tigers to their
the ninth with a double and Lou fourth straight loss.
:} "' :'"::." ::P{:"X .".'::. :. ... . . . ...
Major League Standings
: 4}L : .,,:." ;";":. . W :..".;.. n">a.'..-r:::: ". "".r ". :r.. ":: :"::::wr: >L{",""
Birds fall knocked out the Los Angeles
pitcher in the sixth inning yester-
BALTIMORE - Luis Aparicio's day and downed the Dodgers 7-1.
run-scoring single, following a Sutton, who came into the game
two-out-walk and stolen base by with two straight shutouts and a
Sandy Alomar in the third inning, string of 25 scoreless innings, suf-
gave Joe Horlen and the Chicago fered his 11th career defeat at the
White Sox a 1-0 victory over the hands of the Cubs who were led
Baltimore Orioles last night. by homers by Al Spangler and
Horlen blanked the Orioles on Randy Hundley.
five hits as the White Sox broke a
six-game losing streak with their
first' victory in three starts under Giants shortented
new Manager Don Gutteridge. ST. LOUIS-Bob Gibson, who
Loser Jim Palmer, 3-2, who al- pt.Ld UI3 -hobsGtbson
lowed four hits in eight innings, pitched 13 shutouts last season,
tried several times to pick Alomar ngitei'edhis five-hittyear lasthe
offfirstbseindthethiSt. Louis Cardinals trimmed the
the fleet second baseman swiped San Francisco Giants 3-0.
a base. Aparicio followed with a,; Gibson, 3-2, struck out eight
single to left for the only run in and retired the Giants in order
the game. after the fifth inning, when two
* * strong throws by right fielder Jim{
Dodgers clawed Hicks saved the shutout.
CHICAGO-The Chicago Cubs. DA I LY CLASSI FI EDS
who never had lost to Don Sutton BRING QUICK RESULTS
The "White" team generated
some offense in the fourth quarter
as Preston Henry blasted over,
from the two yard stripe. Iate. in
the final period the "White"
drove to the "Blue" two foot line
but Berutti fumbled the pigskin
on a fourth down play.
Though Schembechler Iwas pleas-
ed with the performance of 'sev-
eral of the squad he was not satis-
fied with over-all play. "The exam
break really hurt us. Those ten
days without practice were ex-!
tremely damaging. Dan Dierdorf
LIMOUSINES
for information call
971 -3700
Tickets are available
at Travel Bureaus or
the Michigan Union
32 Trips/Day
READ AND USE
DA I LY CLASSIF IEDS
G1D Syr c'us e@TUxiv*er sitt~
1969 SuammerSesSioxis
SCHOOL OF ART-FLORENC
SCHOOL OF MUSIC - __. .SWITZERLAN
SCHOOL OF EDUCATIgN ..--....... LONDO
DEPARTMENT OF PHOTOGRAPHY _----.,... MUNIC
ITALIAN LANGUAGE & LITERATURE........FLORENCE
*Undergraduat credit only.
Write for brochure:
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Baltimo
x-Washi
x-Bostoi
Detroit
x-New
Clevelan
AMERICAN LEAGUE
East Division
W L Pct.
re 20 9 .690
ington 16 11 .593
n "14 10 .583
11 14 .440
York 11 15 .423
nd 4 18 .182
West Division
GB
3
3
12,.
2?
6'>
Ili
Minnesota 16 8 667
x-Oakland 14 10 583
Kansas City 14 11 .560
Chicago 9 11i .450
x-California 8 13 .381
x-Seattle 8 15 .348
x-Late games not included
Yesterday's Results
Boston at Seattle, ine.
New York at California, inc.
Washington at Oakland, inc.
Chicago 1, Baltimore 0
Kansas City 7, Detroit 6
Cleveland 1, Minnesota 0
Today's Games
Washington at Oakland, night
New York at California, night
Boston at Seattle, night
Kansas City at Detroit, night
Minnesota at Cleveland, night
Chicago at Baltimore, night
NATIONAL LEAGUE
East Division
W L Pet. (;B
Chicago 19 9 .679 -
Pittsburgh 15 11 .577 3
Philadelphia 12 11 .522 _41/
New York 12 14 .462 6
St. Louis 11 15 .423 7
Montreal 10 15 .400 71,
W est D i isio .6 -
Atlanta 17 9 .654 -
Los Angeles 15 11 .577 2
San Francisco 15I t .577 2
San Diego 13 16 .448 5%
Cincinnati I1 5 .423 6
Houston 8 21 .276 10
Yesterday's Results
Montreal 4, Atlanta 3
New York 8, Cincinnati 1
Philadelphia 5, Houston 4
Chicago 7, Los Angeles 1
San Diego 4, Pittsburgh 2
St. Louis 3, San Francisco 0
Today's Games
Los Angeles at Chicago
Cincinnati at New York, night
Houston at Philadelphia, night
San Diego at Pittsburgh, night
San Francisco at St. Louis, night
Montreal at Atlanta, night
,4
T Y\
I# A %'-A
Racquet
Tennis anyone?
Check The Peak for shorts, shirts, skirts,
shifts, sox and shoes.
Equipment by Wilson, Spaulding, T. A. Davis,
and Bancroft.
Scandinavia clofhinq and Jack Purcell shoes. A
"E
D
N
H
H*
f
Bill says
advertising only benefits
big companies.
But who started
aerosol shave cream?
A small outfit, who
backed a good idea
law 1
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