a special report the Sunday daily by debbie that tber 23 Night Editor: Jim Neubacher February 8, 1970 girI's diary of so the realitie 'N E Monday, Jan. 12 EFORE I STARTED rush, I thought,. sororities were absolutely horrible. I as unable to "think of anything good about rem. The last thing in the world I thought might do would have been to associate yself with one of them. I was completely alienated by the tradi- onal images, of sorority life. Everything I uld think of which was associated with rorities turned me off. First of all, I hated the system. It seemed 'ossly unfair that blacks and Jews were :cluded from all but "their" houses. Be- des, there was no such thing as a poor girl the sororities of my mind. I found the rush systeni repugnant. The ea of going to all those houses, talking to eir turned-up noses for a few moments nd their judging whether you were good hough for them was totally obnoxious. The idea that each local house is virtually introlled by its national affiliate and also r the local and national Panhellenic Asso- ation made me feel that there was no >pe for improvement of the individual >uses. I felt that living in a sorority house would a very limiting situation. A girl would mly come into contact with certain types people-removing herself de facto from e rest of the world. And besides, I thought the girls in sorori- es were the last people on earth that I ould want to be limited to. I thought they ere all superficial snobs, interested in fra- rnity boys, TGs and Saturday night dates. I was positive that they had less than interest in anything at all serious. I adn't met any Greeks at political meetings Tuesday, Jan. 13 I WENT TO the meeting and I thought I had proved my point. All the girls there seemed to be concerned with their own little petty thing. We spent almost an entire hour learning the rules of rush. . You must go to at least ten houses and not just any ten houses. There are five sets of houses and you must go to two houses in each group. There are mixers (otherwise known as first set) then second set, then third set, and finally, after two weeks of these parties, come Final Desserts. After each party, the girls in the house rority s of a were actually interesting people streotypes. Often the topics of sation were the same old soroi boys, parents, parties. But eve some real thinking would turn One of their favorite qu "Where do you live?" Then them East Quad, and yes, I Residential College and every while it would lead to a modera provoking conversation;aboutF amazed me to see that theret girls who were seriously inter same issues I was. The very first house I went to almost made me forge hies forever. A Villager-type cheerleader was lecturing all the good things in her house. I heard all a b o u t tI sweet housemother, the rooms, and then she said, "T here is really gerat. And we have two colored cooks, So Clara, who sometimes let us snitch cookies if we arer them." I almost puked, but that was just one house. ;{.. .r;.;... m ai~ie a ii : '?r{{ '.""";",:" rr?}sa i'??r"i R"}wa:"c,"r}} ;...{rXrfr.:^{??3r{{? ;i {; get together and talk about every girl who came to the house. They, in all of their infinite wisdom, after talking to the rushee for maybe ten minutes, decide whether you are good enough to be invited back to their house. You have to meeta lot of people so they will know who you are-when you de- cide someone's fate you should at least remember her face. Most of the rules and restrictions are absurd. The structure is unnecessary. The WAS REALLY amazed that rush after the first night.I through the week I realized I w curious about sororities. The more houses I went to, th differences I recognized. The typed images were giving way ties of my experiences. As it h first house I went to was one But there actually were better At a few of the houses, gi and stared at me trying very small talk. It was pretty ba couldn't believe that someon through~rush in jeans. And m terribly interested in their hous shocked them. They were what ined sororities were like. But then there were some h( felt almost comfortable. Som dressed the way I was and we off by my appearance. They wa about me. I was beginning to think m see a little more of the soror condemned them any further. Mo SHOCK AND disbelief! I we meeting with my rush c almost all of the houses I visit back for more parties. Even the houses that I ha invited me back. How coul someone who is so anti-sorori make sense. The meeting itself was insa informed of even more rules tions. I didn't think so many c Tuesday, Jan. 20-F I HAD TO admit that rush r proving. I still disliked sor had had a number of good r girls in the houses. I wasn't able to think se being in a sorority but I was understand why the girls wh Greek houses like them as mu Many enjoy the house itself a comfortable place to live, wit They like the girls they are li the atmosphere is very congen to them that the old houses, way, offered a more humana the glass and brick boxes on c The variety in the differe amazing. Some houses are ul tive, some are very liberal. Sor codes and don't allow men u some have no dress regulation open-opens. Some have freque TGs; some have no planned at all. Sat WENT TO two more house They were more conservative the houses that I had beent Somehow though, I was able in perspective. Even though them at all for myself, I coul why certain girls might find houses appealing. The girls lik and enjoyed living together. having meals where everyone up. They enjoyed the privacy men upstairs. They enjoyed th tions which were held. Fine for In one of these houses, I fo totally uninterested in Univer politics-or their own educat rush... 7other world not sorority and sincerely believed in what they were our conver- saying. They brought out the "house radi- rity subjects, cal" (who went to Washington last No- ry so often, vember) to make me feel comfortable. They up, explained why they had various rules in !estions was their house. Gradually, these girls from I would tell another world became real as I was able to was in the relate to them, once in a tely thought Sunday, Jan. 25-Tuesday, an. 27 education. It THIRD SET parties were much better, were sorority even enjoyable. The houses that had in- ested in the vited me back were the ones I liked best. When I walked in, girls I had talked to before yelled out a welcome. I felt very com- #g fortable, almost at once. Apparently, my reputation had spread (or et soror- else people remembered my name from a r me on hash session) for there were always girls he girls' who wanted to talk with me. The small talk ended. I just walked in and talked with he food people. And they were people, contrary to adie and my earlier delusions. The girls vary greatly within each house. n i c e to Even in the so-called conservative houses I found people that I could relate to. My first impressions were based only on a few girls in each house. The more you knew them, the more you realized you couldn't stereotype I continued even the individual houses. The people in But halfway them are all very'separate and unique in- as more than dividuals. e greater the Wednesday, Jan. 28 old stereo- to the reali- TIME FOR Final Desserts. iappened, the Final Desserts are the last time a of the worst. rushee visits a house. It is a more formal houses, occasion, with dessert by candlelight and rls sat there songs. Only girls who stand a good chance hard to make of receiving a bid are invited. d. They just My first Final Dessert was really strange. ,e was going I was at one house instead of running to ny not being three in as many hours. I only talked to a e parties just few girls but they were ones that I espe- e p hartiesagus-cially liked. The atmosphere provided the biggest change. Suddenly, the rushees were more ouses where I than just names going through rush. For te girls were the first time, I felt I was among friends. ren't turned- Finally, after sixteen days of selling them- nted to know selves, no one was trying to tell me how great the house was. They simply answered aybe I should any questions I had. The girls wanted me ities before I to be happy whether I was in their house or another-or even if I stayed in the dorm. But the rituals continued. Being Final inday, Jan. 19 Dessert, the girls had dcided to sing to us nt to another as we ate. While traditions are fine for ounselor and some people, I did not dig them at all. I eeduinedr mndwas laughing at them again. Back to the ed invited me old point of view; sororities were really pret- ty bad. ted the most Then, when wa were leaving, the girls lit d they want our way with candles and sang another song. ity? It didn't It was still the same ritual but for the first time I appreciated it. Although norm- tne. We were ally unsentimental, I was deeply touched. As and regula- I walked home; I discovered I was seriously ould exist. thinking about joining a sorority. I really liked several houses. And I was considering 'riday, Jan. 23 pledging. Then the irony hit me. Debbie Thal, eally was im- enemy of sororities, might soon be living in orities but I one. I had been converted. Everyday it aps with the turned out that most of my preconcep- riously about beginning to o live in the ch as they do. s just a very h good food. ving with and ial. It seemed in their own alternative to ampus. nt houses is tra-conserva- ne have dress upstairs ever; is and permit nt parties and social events urday, Jan. 24 s for mixers.' than any of to previously. to put them I didn't like d understand 3 these, staid ed each other They liked was dressed of not having e social func- them. und the girlsVo sity or world ion for that , i 4 -Daily-Richard Lee tions about sororities were the myths that rushing smashed. I was still aware of how poor the rush system and, Panhel and national affiliations were but it gradually became unimportant. It could be changed. Thursday, Jan. 29 FINAL DESSERTS at my favorite house, I really liked the girls, the food was great, and the building was more than comfortable. The rules were among the most liberal on campus. The social events didn't exist. I had found my place. Unfortunately, I couldn't live there due to a Residential College residency requirement. I was sad. And, while I still condemned sororities' undemocratic system of choosing n e w pledges, I could understand why girls want to live with people they get along with. Maybe sororities will be filled on a first come first serve basis some day. Although I still didn't like dress regula- tion, hours, and social events, they really did not exist in the house I would have chosen. Before rush, I had thought sororities were very limiting. But after talking with the girls, I learned that the houses were any- thing but closed off to the rest of the world. I had feared the national and Panhel affiliations. I learned that they too were becoming more progressive. When there was serious conflict, one house came close to completely disaffiliating itself.'Freedom was possible. Although there were no poor or black stu- dents in the house, the girls who were there were no snobs. They were not all uppper class. They were anything but superficial. And again, change is possible. Both from within and without the .system reforms are being made. Like everything else in this society, it is difficult to break away from tradition, but change was and is coming. There had been changes in Panhel rush rules and intrahouse regulations just this year. The system is very unjust and I still condemn it. However, it can and will be changed as long as there are people who care enough to try-and there are. Sunday, Feb. 1 SINCE I KNEW I couldn't live in a sorority, I didn't preference (sign' up for the houses I would accept a bid from). I had already put sororities out of my mind. The affair was settled. However, due to some administrative error, I received a bid. It was from the house I had liked the best. I know I will miss not being in the house. I like the comfortable rooms and open kitchen. I like the good. food. But most of all, I like the girls; one already invited me to lunch at the house. It wouldn't' have been bad at all-being a sorority girl. A -Daily-Richard Lee or in Washington much less at the LSA sit-in or at North Hall.I was sure that the only extra-curricular activities they were involved in were Homecoming, sorority and fraternity parties, and organizations like UAC,. SORORITIES seemed like an extension of the old high school cliques. I never would have gone through rush if a friend had not made me realize that I had no right to judge sororities with no first hand knowledge. She convinced me to in- vestigate them for myself before I con- demned sororities for their image. Despite my cynacism about finding any- thing attractive in any sorority, I agreed entire rush operation is simply appalling. I thought it typical of sororities to waste so much time with such petty things. I felt sure none of them spent much time march- ing against the Vietnam War, or for any of the political causes I hold so important to myself., There was absolutely no way I would have gone to all of those houses. Maybe two or three. I thought it might be fun trying to freak them out. Wednesday, Jan. 14-Sunday, Jan. 18 HOSE PARTIES sure weren't what I had expected. Some mixers were just horrible but some had decent people. Most of the houses were better than I thought. But I