re re e eerp from a
Ion etter that I recently
received.
r Dr. Faul r:
I am 44-y r-old b
o a p yc trlc
cial r. Your artiel 0
, el tioDlbip een
BI ' atrue bome for me
e I live t my
boyfriend, ho a 42-y
old BI c man.
"We have been lovers for
IS months ind be sWI cal
me hite whenever he i
et ith white people on
job or elsewhere. It' ale
wa 'you white people are
no good.' I trongly believe
that a person' color does not
speak of a person' character,
and I have always treated him
a very peclal Individual.
Sometimes he wfil not peak
to me for days at a time. Then,
be pologizes.
"He seems to be extremely
troubled nd does not want to
go out with me anymore. I
have tried everything that I
can think of. He is afraid of
violence to atd him for
being with me. He will not go
to counseling and ridicules
my profession. Is this prob­
[em part of interracial
relationships, or is something
else wrong? What hould I
do? Slped,Ms. K., NJ."
Dear Ms. K.:
Your problem with your
male friend i common in in­
terracial affiirs in this
SOCiety.
Your friend grew up in an
a.tmo phere of racial buaen-
sid � and � J.{e
ma to tee equate simp- '
ly because' of hiS skin color. .
EACH D� � even DOW,
he i disrespected solely be­
cause he is Black.
Because of your intel­
ligence and education, it
should be of no surprise to
you that your friend is suspi­
cious of white people. No
Black person bas ever abused
him due to his race.
This is the reality of our
society.' Interracial romance
is risky; it carries thi heavy
baggage of historical racism
that is a part of every person's
ycbe.
An approach that you
might use would be to refrain'
from responding in ny way.
at all to your friend's criti­
que of "all white people."
Act if you do not hear these
remarks, but continue to
prove your love and character
with your behavior. After all,
, your countercomments may
tend to provide him with the
,very opportunity that be
needs to release his pent-up
, frustrations. If you allow the
issue to pas , perhaps his an­
tipathy will pass. too.
It is, 'in my opinion, un­
realistic to expect that his �t·
titude, or deep .. seated
antipathy, will disappear per­
manentl y . After all, your
friend most likely. confronts
racism everyday that he goes
out into the public.
Your other alternative
would be to ask him to under­
go lenathy p ychoanal ysis.
But, this is unrealistic.in view
of the fact that your friend'
response is related to real­
life situation and not to fan­
tasy.
IN A RACIST ociety,
the potential for phy ical
violence directed your way is
always there. Interracial
couples have been insulted,
beaten-up, even killed. It
makes sense to take precau·
tions. Unfortunately, I am DOt
able to provide advice regard­
ing personal p ychological or
emotional problems without
personal interviews with the
involved individuals. Good
luc Dr. Faulkner.
Dr. F aulbaer' s adl:Iress is
• : P.O. BO% 188474, SacrDlltDl­
to, CA 95818.
ron
bya
FIRST • room In
home to bow the ba .ButitWlln't
long befoie the traffic throu&b her
bome w enough to warraot the
opening of a ahop.
, . That was three yeara 80.
TOday her tore ruled with ha'
that range in prtee from $40-$150.
They are tyles ahe's brought ck
from buying trips in Ne York,
Cbk:ago and California. In addition,
abe works with a designer In Cincin­
nati and one in Toronto.
And her clients Ipan
demographics from teeagers�wbo BUT TRENDS have changed
go for the derbl and y ball over the years. .
capl-to the orkJna oman who
a te and the oman who. Davia says that for the 19901 hats
WCIII a t to e �U be worn, bion tatemon ,
"The demand II • DavJa says' and have moYCd away fiom the neli-
about the ellen Ie tbe t1raCtI ,tfonalltylea. .
from a lOO-mlle radhll, around ·It'anotaomucbtbctallorcdlook,
KIll-zoo. in tho \, " abc says.
While i'ome mi,ht lay tb'e
popularity of hats comes and goes, in
Davis' opinion. they're always in.
She says ber hion phil phy is
tbat an ouUlt not complete without
a haL -I don't feel dressed undl I
have. hat on," he' d .
Councilwoman 'takes'
issue with article. ..
I am, writing in regard to the inaccuracy of the article, "Slums being
sold·as townhouses," by Correspondent Ron Seigel, that appeared in
the April 19-25 i ue of the Michigan Citizen,
Asid from the tone of the article, �hich portrayed me in a negative
light, and tbe fact that Mr. Seigel�mp�ed me on Thursday, March
S, 1992 to look at tbose dwellin ,I �,mystified how he could ay I
made ,a statement about the recent discoyery of a body on � .
Avenue. However, and for the records, I would like to state, the recent
rash of murders �noems me greatly. .
1berefoI'C, any undue neptlve advertisement that Highland Park
receives affects me in a profoW\d way. But I am �ually conCerned
abo�t this City's dilapidated builc1in , uoemployment, drugs and what
seems to be an escalation in violent crimea.
Furthermore, I call on all of the citI2Cns of Highland Park to help
make this city a safe place. .
Within the next few weekJ I will, be introducing a resolution to the
Countil that I think will help alleviate some of the fears we are
experiencing, and I say to Mr. Seigel: responsible journalism is a civic
duty.
Sincerely,
Greta JOI,IlDI4)11
CouncUwo
Ron Segiel's Reply: I was per- ment told me that the body was not
sonally hocked that Councilwoman found at the address she Ii ted, but at
Johnson felt that the tone of my ar- another ODe. Perhaps the error was
ticle portrayed her in "a negative hera. Per the error w hi.
light." Actually I wrote the article ,
( I try to write all news artfclea) in
an objective, neutral ay, letting the
rae speak for themselves and trying
to get both sid without taking
lid .
However, l.beueve he came
acrou very positively, a member
of tbe council who went out into tbc
community to deal with citizens'
coocerDS such baDdoncd 110
and took action to get something
dODe.
I did indeed accompany ber'
March S to the ho around Wood­
ward in the fillt group abe mentioned
aDd can confirm they were in a very
bad way. rm sorry tbat in the rusb
of a deadline, I neglected to indude
it in the article.
Tbe councilwoman did 11 me
that she filed a complaint about con�
ditions in a vacant building in
J nuary and heard about a body
being fouoo there in March. An of­
ficial of the PubliC Safety Depan·
'IM ONE SENSE, it does not mat­
ter. 1be address he named was very
close to the one she complained
about and tbIa could have happened
at ,any viant ,abaDdoned building. .
" IfMa. Jo 'nmeant to y in her
lenet that wrldDg about problema of
crime represents "negative adver·
litement" of Hi&bJ.and Park, I would
haVe to strongly disagree. Other,
areas, including Oakland County
have had serial killers and otber
serlo crime problems. It would
not be "responsible journalism" for
the pres to ignore or cover up ucb
p'roblems, but, it hould give
coverage to citizens who try to solve
them.
As mucb u I disagree ith Coun- .
cilwoman' Jobnson' personal
crill m of me, I hi' to Y Ibat
far I can , be one poUdcal
lea4er who is trying to solve 1heIe
problo aDd deaerv crec1it for
10.
There
caring
style for
ample, Davl says large ha I'C I10t
appropri Ie for evening wear.
While in past large hats ere
frowned upon for church wear, be­
cau e they ere difficult to ee
around, Davis thinks the attitude has
changed and that lar bats are okay
when the carer i considerate of
others aroun4 ber.
Among D vis' favorite bats, out
of the 100 he owns, a bold red hat
that fits nugly to the head and has
red feather. and a rbl ton appl�-
qUe. n r h , rm, ld
tbat the ll·t Ii her .tyl ,
he decU:led to it ide )'s. It
worted.
(I-r) Bilil DIIVI
met.lllc cherrl .nd trtm.
at rmelon fedora atYIe h
with chiffon around the crown that'
pi hed with pearls. Itwas d igned
by ErIc Javita, well-known mil­
linct.
Davi advise anyone who's
buying a hat, especially for the first
time, to brina along a friend for ad ..
vice. Since t of her ellen are
It be loped a rapport
through wbl h· be can tmmeclfately
find them hats tlla t reflect each in­
dividual tyle.
The abape of the race Is one of the
most important things to tate into
consideration wilen buying a hat,. ad­
vis Davis. Round or full faces are
the most difficult. Ha with brim
and crown in different colors sbould
be avoided, as well hats with
centmi features.
flatter an oval face, bats with up­
twned brims and coDb'lSdng brlml
and crowns work best,
Hats should also be balanced with
body ize. A tall woman can wear.
large hat, while a peti woman
should wear hats that are I bold.
1be bat', style sbould alIo IDa
, ..
that of the outfit-;..don', wear a ... -
cuIine bat with an outfit that speab
fem1ninity .
Davi also offers dvice tor baa
storage. Keep one hat to a box ad
stuff it with ti ue paper to help bold
its shape.
The best way to keep,a hat on II
not with a hat pin, Davis says, be­
cause hat pins are for decoration
only. Most hats come with a blact
elastic band which goes UDder tbe
hair and not UDder the chin.
"ALL O· MY hall are oDC-of·a­
kind, " says Dew of her personal hat
wardrobe, . lth iQdlvldual costing
hlta up to $300. Other lavorlt in­
lcude an el' t turquoise hat ac-
, cented With a r on one ide, and
a ·Itokin" • n oblong black lac­
'quered stra With upturned brim.
. DaVis reveals that he has her
iglUs set on' a black roller traw hal
Introdu ing tb Cometica Classic MasterCar and VISA- credit
cards with a 12 .�A> �R. That'S the lowest interest rate of .
any no-annual .. � card in town. To apply for yours stop at any
Comerica Branch or call 1-800-292-1300 for details.
'Q>P1enCA
� the bottom line isyou.
A, Mcmbct FDt
.'
