38 | OCTOBER 31 • 2024 J
N
A
cross a picnic table
on an alpaca farm in
Southern Israel sat
two Jewish men in their early
20s in deep conversation. One
was dressed in formal Chasidic
garb, complete with long side
curls and big yarmulke, and the
other, a motivational speaker
who survived the horrific Nova
massacre, was clean shaven and
casually dressed.
As Mordechai Wiener, 39,
watched the two men connect
with each other despite their
obvious differences, his heart
filled.
To create harmony and unity
— especially with all the division
in the country — was one of the
goals of the Achva Men’s Retreat
in March, the first of its kind for
English speakers in Israel.
Wiener, who grew up in Oak
Park, attended Bais Chabad
of North Oak Park and was a
student at Yeshiva Beth Yehudah
until eighth grade, has been
interested in men’s groups and
healing work since 2018.
“For the unaffiliated, Men’s
Circles are kind of like group
therapy,” he explained. “We
get together weekly, share our
feelings and support each other to
process emotions.
“It’s about being surrounded
by a judgment-free environment,
where everyone is encouraged to
come as they are, to feel free to
express themselves and process
their feelings, to be seen and feel
connected.”
There are many ways to do
men’s groups, but Wiener prefers
when they are co-led with no
official leader. He first joined a
Men’s Circle in 2018 when he
lived in Brooklyn, and he found it
so useful he went on a few men’s
retreats.
“
Afterwards, I have these great,
deep friendships with people
whom I really know,” he said.
“That’s healing — it’s all about
connection through sharing and
reflecting. Every human needs
healing. That’s why we’re here, to
heal and evolve.”
When Wiener moved to Israel
in March 2023, he was surprised
to discover that he could find no
such retreat for English speakers.
FILLING A NEED
“I thought it would especially be
cool to have a healing space for
men who were all members of
the tribe,” Wiener said. “It would
be a great opportunity to bring
Jewish men together. There’s so
much knowledge in the Jewish
tradition and in our lineage that
can support us by doing this work
together.”
Eager to align his love for Israel
and his passion for healing work
and Men’s Circles, Wiener, who
has a background in business and
entrepreneurialism, connected
with Zev Gelber, who also has
experience with healing work
and gathering men, and Akiva
Pamensky, who is a musician and
community builder.
Together, the three decided to
create a two-day healing retreat
Former Oak Parker
organizes men’s
retreat in Israel.
A
Healing
Space
for Men
ROCHEL BURSTYN
CONTRIBUTING WRITER
ERETZ
A circle in
the desert