14 | SEPTEMBER 19 • 2024
J
N

Y

ears before online dating was a thing,
Temple Israel had what they fondly called
the Beshert Connection. Singles would pay
$36 to be part of this cutting-edge dating program
of the time: a set of binders that contained lists of
singles, categorized by age! Each single had two
pages — front and back — filled with personal info.
A person could come along during “open hours”
and flip through the binders much the same way
people swipe left or right these days on JDate, and
let Temple Israel know if any listed single tickled
their fancy. Temple Israel would then reach out to
the single and, if they were equally interested, a date
would be set.
For his part, it was clearly Divine interven-
tion that Matt Fein even heard about the Beshert
Connection. He’
d grown up in East Lyme,
Connecticut, attended a high school with only a
handful of Jewish students and, in October 1995,
moved to Sterling Heights for a job. Soon after
moving in, he received a surprise welcome package
introducing him to the local Jewish community.
“To this day, I don’t know where it came from.
Who even knew I was Jewish?” Matt mused. “But
there it was, a little pamphlet explaining how the
Beshert Connection worked. I thought, why not? So
I drove over one day and signed up.
”
Soon after that, Lisa then-Sandler, who’
d grown
up in Oak Park, popped over to Temple Israel her-
self, flipped through these binders and expressed
interest in Matt.
“
Actually, he’s four years younger than me, but I
figured that the worst that could happen would be
that he’
d say no,
” Lisa said.
A few weeks went by, and Lisa didn’t hear any-
thing, so she figured he wasn’t interested.
“
Actually, I was interested but I was extremely
busy at the time. I was in the process of moving
to Waterford, so it took a little while to get back to
Temple Israel,
” explained Matt now.
By the time he got back to Temple Israel with
a positive response, Lisa had forgotten what Matt
looked like and was too embarrassed to ask him for
another picture.
“I went back to check out his entry in the binder
again, but Temple Israel was closed and I had to go
back another day,
” Lisa laughed.
Lisa and Matt started talking on the phone
and met for the first time at Starbucks in West
Bloomfield. Their first date was watching Kenny
Loggins at Pine Knob on Labor Day. More mem-
orable than the actual date, according to Lisa, was

receiving a phone call immediately after that date
from her mother, who said, “Quick, turn on the
news! Princess Diana was in a car accident …
”
After six months of dating, Matt was ready to
propose. He wanted to do it right, but just like there
was no JDate, there was also no Google, so he had
to get his info the old-fashioned way.
One day, the couple was at the Farmington Hills
library and Matt picked up a book titled How to
Choose the Right Engagement Ring, before remem-
bering, “Yikes, she’s right there.
”’ He quickly hid the
book behind his back and exchanged some under-
standing smiles with the kind librarian behind the
desk while a confused Lisa thought he was trying to
hit on the librarian in front of her!
A short while later, Matt was watching a bas-
ketball game with friends. Knowing Lisa was fond
of sweets, Matt’s friends gave him a brownie for
Lisa. Afterward, as Lisa and Matt watched a movie
together, he put the engagement ring in a plastic bag
inside the brownie, took a bite of the brownie and
pretended he’
d bit into a piece of ceramic!
“I’m glad Matt knew to wrap the ring in a plastic
bag,
” Lisa laughed. “I read a story about a guy who
tried the exact same shtick on his fiancée, and she
bit into the ring, broke her tooth and needed a
crown! I’m so glad that didn’t happen to me.
”
Toothfully, Lisa was very surprised about the
proposal.
“We’
d never discussed getting engaged and had
only been dating a few months!” Lisa said. “I was 32
when I got married.
”
They married in December 1998 at Temple Israel,
which was so excited that their Beshert Connection
had helped facilitate the match that they shared it
with the Jewish News.
“
A JN reporter interviewed us, and a photogra-
pher took pictures, and there was a great article
about it,
” Lisa said.
Today, the couple lives in West Bloomfield; Matt
works as an engineer for General Motors and Lisa is
an exercise physiologist, personal trainer and Pilates
and group fitness instructor.
Their son, Corey, 20, is currently studying urban
planning at Michigan State University.
Naturally, they are still proud members of Temple
Israel. Although to this day, when either one of
them is upset with the other, they’ll quip, “Well,
what do you expect; we only paid $36!”

This column will appear biweekly. If you’d like to share your

‘meet-cute’ story, email burstynwithjoy@hotmail.com.

Temple Israel’s
Beshert Connection

ROCHEL BURSTYN CONTRIBUTING WRITER

OUR COMMUNITY
HOW WE MET

TOP TO BOTTOM: Matt and Lisa today. Matt and Lisa Fein
after they first met. The Fein family: Corey, Lisa and Matt.