AUGUST 8 • 2024 | 21
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N
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aureen Schiffman
of Novi loves the
candles at Chanukah.
Half a dozen years ago, she
recalls, she felt sad as she lit
for the last night, her menorah
illuminated in the window.
She thought of the story,
how a small group of men were
able to ward off an army and
save the Jewish people. And
to celebrate that, she started
lighting Shabbat candles. Then
she made a challah cover, got
her son’s Kiddush cup from his
bar mitzvah, pulled out candle
holders that had belonged to
her grandmother, and made
Shabbat a more active part of
her life.
“I started doing the prayers
— I took a book from Adat
Shalom and started singing
more of the songs out of the
book. Between my husband
and me and my cat and my
dog, we all enjoyed doing that,”
she says.
Formerly a music teacher at
Temple Emanuel’s preschool,
she knows the blessings well,
she says. “I recorded a song and
I put it on as I’m getting the
challah ready, and the wine; the
cat and dog hear that song and
they know they’re going to get
challah, so they join us in the
living room.”
After making Shabbat
blessings, Schiffman says,
she goes to her den and
looks at the wall filled with
pictures of her relatives who
are no longer alive, greeting
them, remembering them
and reflecting on their
accomplishments. “I say ‘good
Shabbos’
,” she says, adding
that it gives her a sense of
closeness with them, and that
she updates the list with the
names of others who pass away,
as well as those who she hears
did good things for the Jewish
people.
“I go through the whole wall
— there’s relatives and friends
that I’ve lost — and by doing
that, I feel like they’re looking
at me. I’m saying their names.
I’m feeling they’re there and
enjoying the same thing I’m
enjoying.”
To round out her ritual, she
says, she honors the memory
of a 12-year-old from Paris
who perished in the Holocaust,
whose picture she has on the
wall as part of an initiative to
remember the children who
died. “Then when I’m done, I
just feel like this was a really
nice session, everybody enjoyed
it, and that’s Shabbat for me.”
She and her husband then
head out to dinner in Walled
Lake, where they eat at the
same restaurant every week.
“It’s a real nice way to end the
Shabbos.”
Schiffman’s family has strong
ties to Metro Detroit’s Jewish
community — her parents
were founders of Beth Shalom,
part of the original group that
would meet at people’s homes,
including hers, as they readied
the money to start the building
in Oak Park, she says.
Every Shabbos she also calls
her aunt, who’s 89 and lives in
New Jersey. “It’s a very special
part of my Shabbos to talk to
her. She’s my oldest living rela-
tive, my dad’s sister,” she says.
Back at her house, as she
leaves the den filled with
pictures, she says she has a
sense that everyone she spoke
to heard her wishes of good
Shabbos, and that made her feel
that Shabbos was complete. “In
this way,” she says, “I feel like I
keep their light alive.”
Shabbat ritual keeps lost friends
and family close at heart.
Keeping Their
Light Alive
KAREN SCHWARTZ CONTRIBUTING WRITER
CELEBRATING SHABBAT
Maureen Schiffman says
good Shabbos to her
friends and relatives who
have passed.
After the Shabbat candles
are lit, Maureen and Lenny
Schiffman enjoy dinner at
their favorite restaurant.