32 | MAY 9 • 2024 
J
N

T

he meaning and expe-
riences of motherhood 
transcend words. It’s a 
journey marked by profound 
moments of joy, challenges that 
test the limits of one’s patience, 
and a love so 
deep and bound-
less that it defies 
explanation. 
I am so thankful 
to have witnessed 
the beautiful 
example of my 
wife, Mayim, who 
has shown me 
what it means to be a loving, 
patient and mindful mom. 
However one becomes a 
mother, the holy role of mother-
hood can be transformational. 
I have come to understand 
that being a mom is about nur-
turing — beyond simple nutri-
tion. From the moment our first 
child was born, Mayim’s instinct 
to protect, guide and nourish our 
new tiny being was awe- 
inspiring. 
Her boundless patience for the 
needs of our children, her gentle 
presence soothing and cuddling 
our restless kiddos to sleep and 
her nourishment of our children 
has shown me how much that 
motherly nurturing extends 
beyond the physical; it means 
being a support for our children 
in their emotional, intellectual 
and spiritual growth. 
I have also come to under-
stand that motherhood often 
means sacrifice. From sleepless 

nights to selflessly putting the 
needs of her children above her 
own, I have witnessed just how 
much of oneself motherhood 
asks for. Mothers are asked to 
sacrifice their bodies, their sleep, 
their career aspirations and 
sometimes even their own sense 
of self to support their kids. 
I remember a moment when 
our first child was first born — 
within the first week or two of 
bringing our daughter home. 
My wife and I were bleary-eyed 
and sleep-deprived, sleeping 
on a couch next to one another 
because we were waking up our 
daughter every two hours for 
feedings, and it was easier than 
moving to just sleep where we 
were. The alarm went off to let 
us know it was time for anoth-
er feeding and I forced myself 
awake and, by the time my eyes 
were open and I had the where-
withal to figure out what I was 
doing, Mayim had gotten up, 
scooped up baby Liliana and was 
getting ready to feed her. 
It was then the beautiful com-
plexity of motherhood began to 
hit me. Here was my wife who 
had just given birth — her body 
was still healing and recovering 
from labor and changing yet 
again after evicting her tenant for 
the last nine months. 
Mayim was sleep-deprived yet 
she was up and attending to the 
needs of our little being, giving 
her the nourishment she needed 
to thrive, while I was simply 
struggling to function with little 

sleep and still coming to grips 
with just how much our lives 
had changed. 
I have come to understand 
that this selflessness comes from 
the depths of love a mother can 
have for her children — it can be 
unconditional, unwavering and 
eternal. It’s in the way a mother’s 
heart swells with pride at her 
child’s achievements, how she 
deeply and personally feels her 
children’s successes and failures, 
and the fierce protection she 
offers in times of need. 
Children who grow up with 
the ever-present love and sup-
port a mother can offer a life 
with the foundational knowledge 
that they are loved, which can 
make a world of difference in 
one’s life. This deep love of a 
mother brings with it an innate 
ability to help her children perse-
vere in the face of adversity. The 
comfort of a mother’s embrace 
can be a grounding force 
throughout a child’s life. 
If we’re doing it right, being 
a parent is about creating a safe 
and nurturing environment 
where children feel loved, sup-
ported and accepted for who 
they are. Mothers can be the 
driving force behind this — 
the glue that holds everything 
together and the pillars of 
strength upon which their loved 
ones lean. 
At the same time, I am aware 
of the innate power one’s rela-
tionship with their mother has. 
Mayim and I often joke, after 

working through a particular-
ly difficult matter with one of 
our kids, that we need to again 
contribute to the kids’ therapy 
fund. With this joke comes the 
real awareness that our first 
relationships can affect a child’s 
emotional growth as they get 
older and that, for some, that 
foundational relationship can be 
more a point of pain than a point 
of comfort. 
More than anything, I have 
learned that motherhood is com-
plicated — a constant balancing 
act that asks so much of those in 
our lives we call mothers. 
Our matriarchs Sarah and 
Rebecca show us this through 
their actions in Torah. Sarah, 
who put her own desires to be a 
mother aside to be the mother 
of a people, and Rebecca, who 
helped to do God’s will when her 
husband, Isaac, wasn’t prepared 
to do it himself, have indelibly 
impacted the Jewish people. 
Without these strong, deter-
mined, patient and compassion-
ate matriarchs, the Jewish people 
would not be who we are today 
— in fact, if not for them we 
might not be a people at all. 
We wouldn’t be if not for our 
mothers, and we wouldn’t be 
who we are without those we call 
mothers. On Mothers’ Day, we 
acknowledge and thank all those 
mothers in our lives and wish 
them all Happy Mother’s Day. 

Rabbi Matt Zerwekh is the rabbi of 

Temple Emanu-El in Oak Park.

 A 
Holy Role

OUR COMMUNITY
MOTHER’S DAY ESSAY

Rabbi Matt 
Zerwekh