APRIL 27 • 2023 | 11

I’m Only Human 
I was inspired by “Which Side 
Are You On: Jewish American 
or American Jew,” in the 
March 30, 2023, issue (page 8).
This identity-conundrum 
article took me back to my 
20s. My husband, Marty, 
and I, now married 58 years, 
attended a seminar for young 
Jewish marrieds. We assem-
bled in a smallish room in a 
Jewish organizational building 
with about 15 couples. The 
leader asked us to stand up 
and to each select one cor-
ner of the room that most 
closely described our primary 
identity. He encouraged us to 
choose for ourselves and not 
go with our spouses unless the 
choice was ours as well. 
Then he designated the 
corners, pointing to each as he 
labeled them. The four iden-
tities were: Jew, American, 
human, and woman or man.
When everyone had 
crowded into one corner or 
the other, we all paused to 
acknowledge — and high-

five — our corner-mates, then 
glanced around the room 
to assess the others’ choices. 
Approximately one-fourth of 
the group was in each corner. 
Most couples had separated.
After some amusement, we 
were asked to retake our seats. 
The leader proceeded to quote 
the Talmud. I recall this para-
phrased message: Above all, 
our primary responsibility is 
to be human; to identify with 
all other humans and to cel-
ebrate or at least tolerate our 
differences. The ancient schol-
ars implied that no religion, 
gender or nationality or race 
prevails over humanity, shared 
by the entire species, since- 
labeled Homo sapiens.
The message affirmed my 
personal choice that night and 
has persisted with me all these 
decades, guiding my perspec-
tives. My primary role and 
responsibility is as a human, 
all the rest compose a subset 
of that identity. 

— Sandra Rubin Tessler

Bloomfield Hills

letters

desperately need to aspire 
to today — should give 
everyone pause. And today, 
we see a lack of respect 
for one another that is 
ominously reminiscent of 
the students of Rabbi Akiva. 
Sefirat ha-omer reminds 
us of the dangers in this 
transitional period leading 
up to the giving of the law 
— and what happens when 
we demonize our opponents 
and don’t engage with 
dignity in society.
We must heed the 
warning signs of the period 
of sefirat ha-omer. Our 
“startup nation” needs a new 

Sinai moment to institute 
a healthy system of law, 
with checks and balances 
to moderate the dangers 
of unchecked passions and 
interests, which we can all 
endorse — our own na’aseh 
v’nishma moment.
In the desert, it was the 
leadership who shepherded 
the people to Sinai. Today, 
the tables are turned, and 
we the people must demand 
this of our leaders. 

Rabbi Herzl Hefter is the founder 

and Rosh of Beit Midrash Har’el 

in memory of Belda Kaufman 

Lindenbaum, in Jerusalem.

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24725 West 12 Mile – Ste. 110

Southfield, MI 48034

1-248-945-1111

24725 West 12 Mile – Ste. 110
Southfield, MI 48034
1-248-945-1111

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Southfield, MI 48034
1-248-945-1111

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