DECEMBER 29 • 2022 | 33

possible that she doesn’t charge for the 
educational materials or her time, only 
the beautiful workshop journals that each 
student receives as part of the program. 
The second part is parent education 
through talks and workshops. 
“The mothers have grown up in the same 
culture; they’re struggling with the same 
issues,
” Forta said. “I’m not preaching a 
positive body image, rather a neutral body 
image. Sometimes we do feel negatively 
about ourselves, it’s only natural. Regardless, 
however we feel about our bodies — that 
shouldn’t run the show of who we are. 
There are so many other parts to us besides 
our bodies.
”
The third part is educating the teachers 
how to recognize the signs and symptoms 
of eating disorders, the dangers of diet 
culture and weight stigma, as well as 
ensuring they understand what the struggle 
is really all about.
Forta said that if a student is suspected of 
having an eating disorder, it is imperative 
that they be evaluated by a therapist or 
doctor who is trained in eating disorders. 
Untrained doctors may not fully recognize 
the symptoms for what they are. 
Atzmi has only been up and running for 
one year, but it’s been introduced in seven 
schools already and there are more in the 
pipeline. 
“This is so necessary and important,
” 
Forta said. “Everyone knows someone who 
had an eating disorder or who was touched 
by the issue in some way. If we can give our 
girls the tools they need to question society’s 
expectations and appreciate the incredible 
gifts they each have, this helps today, but is 
also an investment in the future.
”

A COMMUNITY AT RISK
Why are Jews more at risk of developing 
body image issues and eating disorders? 
 “It is hard to say exactly,
” Forta answered. 
“There is a genetic component, which is 
part of the reason that we do see them in 
families.
”
For some, there may be another 
underlying mental illness, such as OCD, 
depression or anxiety, which can contribute 
to feelings of unworthiness and increase 
risk.
Another cause is cultural — could be 
from a learned behavior. For example, a 
common mistake is to reward kids with 

food. This, according to Forta, is dangerous 
and can skew their relationship with food. 
“Food is nourishment. We need three 
meals a day every day for our entire 
lives,
” said Forta. “When you use food as 
a reward or reinforcement of a behavior, 
you undermine healthy eating habits, 
which can potentially disrupt a child’s 
ability to accurately recognize and respect 
hunger and fullness signals and can make 
food about feelings of achievement or an 
alleviation of a negative emotion.
” 
Forta continued, “Look at infants; they 
know when they’re full and stop drinking. 
Somehow those innate cues that we’re born 
with disappear over time, often due to the 
messages we receive about food from the 
people around us. Atzmi helps girls rebuild 
their relationship with food.
” 
This is an especially important message 
among Jews, who, after all, celebrate and 
mourn and talk with food; it’s practically 
ingrained in our DNA.
Well-meaning comments from fami-
ly and friends can also have an impact. 
Sometimes when someone loses weight, 
they receive a lot of positive reinforcement 
and attention and this can contribute to the 
message that their appearance is primary, 
ultimately contributing to an eating disor-
der. Even the most innocuous-sounding 
words can be a trigger.
Even saying something as innocent as 
“Hi, long time no see. You look great; have 
you lost weight?” can be problematic, as it is 
overly focused on looks. Likewise, constant-
ly complimenting little girls with “you are 
so beautiful” or “you look so pretty” sends a 
subtle message about priorities.
“Never tell someone, ‘you’re so skinny; 
I wish I had your self-control’ or ‘can’t you 
just eat?’ Never tell a recovering anorexic, 
‘You look good. You look like you gained 
weight,
’” Forta said. “These things can be so 
painful for them to hear.
”
With so much that it’s better not to say, 
innocent conversations can feel like a land-
mine. Forta said that the most soothing 
sentiments are always, “I’m here for you, 
I care about you, how can I help” with 
absolutely zero focus on a person’s physical 
appearance. 
Eating disorders can impact a person’s 
cognitive, mental, emotional and physical 
functions. Many people recover from eat-
ing disorders and are fine. But sadly, other 

times there can be lingering issues that last 
well into adulthood. 
“Depending on the severity and the 
length of time of their illness, they might 
struggle with osteoporosis, heart condi-
tions, a damaged metabolism, erosion of 
the esophagus, ruined teeth and electrolyte 
imbalances, among other things,
” Forta said. 
 
LOOKING TO THE FUTURE
According to Forta, eating disorders and 
body image issues are also a problem 
among males. After receiving tremendous 
feedback about Atzmi, Forta hopes to one 
day tailor a similar program for Jewish 
males, too. 
“We’re teaching girls these completely 
new ways to think and relate to their bodies. 
Sometimes the ideas are met with resistance 
at first; after all, these are all new concepts. 
We have these beliefs taught and reinforced 
by society — fat is bad, food makes us fat, 
we need to be thin to be good people — but 
thankfully, these young girls are open to 
questioning society’s long-held beliefs and 
are open to understanding things in a new 
way,
” Forta said. 
“These are small steps that are hopefully 
impacting the mothers of the next genera-
tion who will lead their own kids by exam-
ple and lessen the risk of future generations 
developing these painful illnesses.
” 

The “My Best Self” Project from Atzmi is an entire-

ly free program funded completely by generous 

donors. Atzmi is online at Atzmi.org. Consider 

helping support its mission at Atzmi.org/donate. 

Dr. Marcy Forta welcomes your comments and 

thoughts. She can be reached at marcy@atzmi.org.

Dr. Marcy 
Forta

