DETROIT JEWISH NEWS
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JULY 28 • 2022 | 7

every Friday, which were not 
even allowed in my dorm. 
Or maybe it was the need to 
find what I stood for when 
everyone else seemed to 
already have it figured out. 
My freshman year of 
college I found myself 
wanting to become more 
religious. That year I started 
with the small commitment 
of not eating pork and trying 
to avoid mixing meat and 
dairy. It was challenging, but 
not impossible in my dining 
hall with a wide variety of 
choices. Then, I stopped 
eating shellfish and decided 
to go to the shul on my 
college campus for the High 
Holidays. It was right around 
the block from a fraternity 
village, and I recall seeing a 
football match take place in 
the front yard of a fraternity 
house as I was going to a 
Shabbat dinner. 
I remember my first time 
explaining what it meant to 
be Jewish to a non-Jewish 
friend and feeling happy 
with my explanation. I told 
her being Jewish is believing 
in only one God, and that 
you should do good deeds 
whenever possible. Though 
she was not very religious 
herself, I could tell that she 
was intrigued by what I had 
said. That made me want 
to explore my own religion 
further. 
Throughout college, some 
of my fondest memories 
included lighting the 
Chanukiah in my apartment 
with my roommate and 
accidentally having a candle 
fall out, and her grabbing it 
off the table in the nick of 

time. Or going to one of my 
favorite ramen restaurants 
on campus and always asking 
the server to switch out the 
pork broth in my ramen 
with miso or fish broth and 
to substitute the pork belly 
with fried tofu or chicken. I 
remember eating my dessert 
first, followed by the main 
course, because dairy can be 
eaten before meat in Jewish 
religion, but dairy cannot be 
eaten right after meat. 
Though college life might not 
have made it as convenient, 
I’m glad I walked through 
the rain to hear the shofar on 
Rosh Hashanah and fasted on 
Yom Kippur in my dorm. 

FRIDAY NIGHTS
After college, I decided to 

make Friday nights a time 
when I unplugged from 
technology, spent my time 
at home with the people 
close to me or had a game 
night with friends instead 
of going to bars and clubs. 
Clearing my Friday evening 
schedule from work proved 
to be a bit more challenging 
than I thought it would be. 
For starters, my boss looked 
at me funny when I tried to 
explain to him that Friday 
evening was my religious day 
of rest and that I wasn’t just 
using that as an excuse to 
party. 
After I explained to him 
that I was Jewish and couldn’t 
work Friday evenings, he 
still wasn’t convinced that 
my observance was the 

reason that I couldn’t work. 
This made me realize how 
especially important it was 
for me to uphold my beliefs 
when celebrating a holy day 
that has been observed since 
the beginning of my religion. 
I found a different job 
and continued with my goal 
of observing Shabbat in a 
society where my religion 
is in the minority. Every 
week I do my best to make 
Friday evenings a time for 
conversation, board games 
and relaxing, or spending 
time in nature. I can’t say 
the people close to me have 
found this easy, but everyone 
who has joined me has found 
it rewarding in some way. To 
me, showing someone else 
the benefits of taking Friday 
nights to rest from the trivial 
tasks of this world is worth 
standing by my beliefs a 
million times over.
I have been asked many 
times, mostly by my Jewish 
friends, how observant I 
am when it comes to my 
religion. I haven’t been able 
to give them an answer. In 
this world where we use so 
many labels on everything 
we do, why not see being 
Jewish as an opportunity 
that exists each day for every 
Jew regardless of level of 
observance. An opportunity 
to try a new recipe, to walk 
into the nearest shul or 
Jewish gathering or to simply 
rest. An opportunity to try 
a new experience at one’s 
own level of comfort, free 
of judgment and 
expectations. 

Rachel Lanis lives in Metro Detroit.

The Chanukiah 
the author lit in 
her apartment 
in college.

Ramen 
served up 
without 
pork.

