 SEPTEMBER 3 • 2020 | 5

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for openers
Passing Time … 

letters

T

his pandemic has had 
a strange, paradoxical 
effect on my concept 
of time. Being confined 
mostly to my 
home, life in 
general seems 
to be mov-
ing more at a 
snail’
s pace, yet 
the month of 
August went by 
lightning fast. 
And the longer 
the COVID crisis continues, 
the more I seem to lose track 
of time. “It’
s Monday? Huh, 
feels like Saturday.”
Thank goodness, though, 
that despite society clos-
ing down, my brain hasn’
t. 
(Depending on who you ask.) 
That’
s a good thing because 
I’
m definitely a reluctant 
member of the “an idle mind 
is the devils’
 playground” club. 
I’
m grateful my chapter of that 
club shuttered its doors to 
avoid large gatherings.
The slower pace has 
allowed me to focus on 
details of life that might not 
normally get my attention. 
Starting with products that 
proclaim they kill 99.9% of 
bacteria. Noticing them more 
because of the manic wash-
and-wipe-it-off world we 
now live in. In my household 
that includes Lysol Kitchen 
Pro, Windex Multi-Surface 
Disinfectant Cleaner and 
Purell Hand Sanitizer.
How is it that these compa-
nies come so close to killing 
everything but can’
t get that 
extra .1%?! Do their scientists 
hang up their lab coats at 
the end of the day and say, 
“eh, close enough?” And why 

don’
t they at least tell us what 
germs are in the .1% they 
can’
t kill? I mean, they must 
know which germs they are 
to state they can’
t kill them, 
right?
Another small detail I’
ve 
focused on … I’
m wondering 
how many days since March 
I haven’
t worn pants. Let me 
clarify — long pants. I think 
it’
s safe to say less than five 
days. I don’
t know how I’
m 
going to reenter society wear-
ing something other than 
gym shorts. And I’
m talking 
about the one pair of old, 
very unflattering gym shorts 
I’
ve been wearing that I have 
no business even going to get 
the mail in — but do.
Mail. There’
s another thing 
I’
ve been hyper-focused on, 
or at least was. I’
ve graduated 
from getting the mail with 
gloves on and opening it with 
the precision of a micro-
surgeon — to grabbing the 
mail barehanded, ripping it 
open and washing my hands 
immediately afterward. I do 
though, still let the mail mar-
inate on my garage floor for a 
few days before bringing it in 
the house.
Like a lot of folks who are 
hunkered down at home, 
my television viewing has 
increased tremendously. The 
increased screen time has led 
to my paying more attention 
to programming options I’
d 
normally bypass.
I’
m hungry for live sports 
but never would I have imag-
ined that in pre-COVID I 
would’
ve stopped to watch, 
and this is for real, a World 
Cornhole Championship on 
ESPN. You know what this is; 

you just may not have known 
what it was called.
It’
s a popular sport on 
college campuses, especially 
at tailgate parties. Two oppo-
nents attempt to throw small 
bags of corn kernels through 
a hole on a raised platform. 
It’
s kind of like playing shuf-
fleboard with a vegetable. 
I watched two men, excuse 
me, “athletes,” do this for 
several minutes. Don’
t think 
this sport is taken seriously? 
These guys were wearing 
sweat suits covered in cor-
porate sponsorship logos. I 
actually stuck around long 
enough to watch the winner’
s 
press conference.
Finally, because the weath-
er has been so good — I 
mean, I think it’
s one of the 
best summers I can recall — 
I’
ve been spending an inordi-
nate number of hours sitting 
in my yard. I eat, work and 
even sleep out there. I’
ve even 
been known to sleep through 
lawn 
mowers circling me.
I also now find myself 
hyper-focused on the squir-
rels on our property and 
their daily, repetitive behav-
iors. And I actually think my 
friendly, daily presence has 
reduced their normal squirrel 
skittishness. Until last week, 
when I made the mistake of 
discussing politics with them. 
Hmmm, maybe I am going 
squirrelly. Happy, healthy 
New Year! 

Alan Muskovitz is a writer, voice-
over/acting talent, speaker, and 
emcee. Visit his website at laugh-
withbigal.com,“Like” Al on Facebook 
and reach him at 
amuskovitz@renmedia.us

Alan 
Muskozitz
Contributing 
Writer

Support Community 
Teachers
I want to commend the Jewish 
News for publishing the beautiful 
article from Sam Arnold on the 
value of Jewish education and 
the support that the communi-
ty needs to give to its teachers 
(“Jewish Education’
s Virtual 
Future,
” Aug. 13, page 10). 
The experience that Sam 
talked about, the NewCAJE 
Conference, was recent-
ly renamed from the CAJE 
Conference, which originally 
stood for the Coalition for 
Alternatives in Jewish Education. 
I was fortunate to be present at 
the second conference many 
years ago at the Rochester 
Institute of Technology in New 
York. I truly believe that this 
experience and subsequent 
attendance at nearly 20 addi-
tional conferences was the most 
valuable educational opportunity 
that I had. 
I was a teacher of students 
from toddlers to senior adults 
and learned so much to assist 
me in being the best that I 
could be for almost 60 years. I 
also noticed that you printed a 
letter from Rabbi Cherie Koller-
Fox, the current president of 
NewCAJE, imploring the con-
gregations and the community 
to underwrite the costs of this 
experience for its teachers and 
assistants. 
I want to publicly thank 
Congregation Shaarey Zedek 
and Adat Shalom Synagogue, 
who helped me attend CAJE. 
I hope that all synagogue and 
temples will show their support 
in this endeavor. While attending 
virtually is nice, the experience 
of singing with Debbie Friedman 
(z”l), Peter Yarrow, Kol B’
Seder, 
Craig Taubman and some of the 
newest entertainers for young 
Jewish people or learning with 
some of the great teachers of 
our time, the ability to phys-

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