I

t was a few months into my internship at 
Beit T’
Shuvah, a Los Angeles Jewish rehab 
for addictions. My job was to meet with cli-
ents one-on-one to discuss the spiritual aspects 
of their recovery. One of my clients had the 
same struggle almost every week 
in our sessions. Often when I’
d 
ask him a question (“How did it 
feel to be seen as a leader among 
your friends?” “What did you tell 
yourself to justify being mean to 
another resident?”), he would start 
to answer — and then midway 
through would slow down and 
start intently searching my face 
for hints as to whether his answer was “correct” 
or not. 
Every week we had the same follow-up con-
versation in which I’
d tell him that it wasn’
t 
about getting the “right” answer but about 
being honest with himself, with me and with his 
Higher Power. My goal was not for him to say 
what sounded good, but rather to address what 
was not good so we could work it out together.
As these High Holy Days approach, much like 
my former client, I find myself quite concerned 
about my own “wrong” answers from the past 
year. I have certainly made mistakes and failed 
to live up to my own expectations! As I prepare, 
one scene from our liturgy haunts me. Our 

Unetaneh Tokef uses a courtroom metaphor, say-
ing: “In truth You [God] are Judge and Arbiter, 
Counsel and Witness.” When I read this line, I 
cannot help but conjure an eerie image in which 
I am on trial as the defendant — and as my eyes 
pan across the room, the “person” in every single 
seat is God: God seated in front in judge’
s robes, 
God approaching the bench to confer with the 
judge, God taking notes on the stenography 
machine, God sitting in the gallery observing the 
proceedings. 
As frightening as I find this scene at first 
blush, perhaps it is not as adversarial as it feels. 
Perhaps as I sit, literally surrounded by God, 
the goal is exactly the same as it was when I sat 
with my client: to find and to face the truth. The 
courtroom becomes a place not for meting out 
punishments, but rather for forensic analysis of 
what went wrong and why. Maybe the cross-
examination is less about having gotten caught 
and more about forcing myself to confront the 
impulses that led me to behave badly. 
I wish you a High Holiday season of coura-
geous honesty and of true willingness to con-
front yourself. I hope that 5780 brings you new 
growth, opportunities and connections to our 
incredible Metro Detroit Jewish Community. 

Megan Brudney is a rabbi at Temple Beth El in 
Bloomfield Township.

22 | SEPTEMBER 26 • 2019 

Rosh Hashanah

Rosh
Hashanah 5780

Local rabbis send greetings for the High Holidays.

Rabbi Megan 
Brudney

Turning “Right” Answers
into Right Answers in 5780

continued on page 24