46 July 25 • 2019
jn

W

hen Mary Sue Schottenfels’
 
husband Ken Knoppow was 
diagnosed with prostate 
cancer in 2010, it was not only difficult 
for him, but she also found herself facing 
emotions of fright and isolation.
“I think the biggest challenge is bal-
ancing a full-time job and giving him 
support,
” she said. “It’
s the stress of not 
knowing what the future holds.
”
Schottenfels, 69, works as executive 
director of CLEARCorps, a Detroit-
based nonprofit organization that pro-
motes healthy home environments to 
Detroit residents. She also took on the 
task of keeping track of her husband’
s 
medications and doctors’
 appointments, 
as well as escorting him to almost every 
appointment. Knoppow, 70, is being 
treated by a team of oncologists at the 
Barbara Ann Karmanos Cancer Institute. 
“It’
s been really good in terms of his 
openness to my help,
” she said of Ken, a 
retired criminal law attorney. 
Doctors discovered Knoppow’
s cancer 
“fairly early,
” according to the couple, 
and he underwent a prostatectomy and 
radiation, which eliminated the cancer. 
But then the prostate cancer returned 

in 2016 and metastasized to Knoppow’
s 
bones. He has received immunotherapy 
treatments and targeted therapies and is 
now receiving chemotherapy. 
Knoppow is also being screened by his 
primary oncologist Ulka Vaishampayan, 
M.D., director of the Phase I Clinical 
Trials Program at Karmanos, to deter-
mine if he is eligible to participate in a 
clinical trial at Karmanos. His situation 
is complicated because he has a BRCA2 
gene mutation, which is common among 
Ashkenazi Jews and increases an individ-
ual’
s likelihood of being diagnosed with 
a variety of cancers including breast, 
ovarian, pancreatic and prostate cancers, 
as well as melanoma.

FINDING SUPPORT
Both Schottenfels and Knoppow, who 
live in West Bloomfield, take part 
in Karmanos’
 support groups at the 
Weisberg Cancer Treatment Center in 
Farmington Hills. Schottenfels said her 
participation in the Caregivers Support 
Group provides her a lifeline in handling 
both the practical and emotional chal-
lenges of caring for Ken.
“We focus on treatment options, how 

to communicate with your doctor, lon-
gevity questions and fears,
” Schottenfels 
said. “We talk about what a specific 
person is going through. We laugh a lot, 
too. Even situations that are horrible can 
be funny.
”
Knoppow attends Karmanos’
 Men’
s 
Support Group and says the members 
discuss their respective diseases. 
“It puts things in perspective, and 
it makes you feel less alone,
” he said. 
“Everybody should really try a support 
group. You see people in similar situa-
tions.
”
The couple say it is most helpful when 
a fellow support group member is in 
the same place as they are as it relates to 
the disease. Talking to that person really 
helps when it comes to making treat-
ment decisions.
“The Caregivers Support Group is 
invaluable,
” Schottenfels said. “We feel 
pretty bonded with each other. To me, 
it’
s like you walk into the room and it’
s a 
sigh of relief.
”
Kathleen Hardy, LMSW
, an oncology 
social worker at the Weisberg center, said 
the ripples of a cancer diagnosis extend 
to family members who can experience 

higher-than-normal stress levels. That’
s 
why social and emotional support is so 
important for those who care for indi-
viduals diagnosed with cancer.
“Spouses may be asked to provide 
emotional support, to help with deci-
sion making, to provide medical care, 
to manage financial stressors and to 
live with a certain amount of fear and 
uncertainty,” she said. “In a family 
(support) group, you know you are not 
alone. Other group members understand 
the changing roles and increasing 
demands and are there for your support.” 
 
Karmanos’
 various support groups, 
those located in Farmington and at the 
main Detroit location, are free and open 
to the public, even if an individual is not 
being treated at Karmanos. Caregivers 
and cancer patients also can take part 
in Karmanos’
 Healing Arts Program in 
Farmington Hills, which is free and open 
to the community. The program includes 
music and art therapy, massage, Reiki, 
Tai Chi classes and other complementary 
therapies.

LOOKING FORWARD
Both Schottenfels and Knoppow remain 
active as a way to live each day with the 
disease. Knoppow is involved with Meals 
on Wheels, teaches chess to school-
age children and organizes a monthly 
folk music concert series at the West 
Bloomfield Library. Besides her day job, 
Schottenfels enjoys spending time with 
family, and both are involved with poli-
tics. They also attend Temple Kol Ami in 
West Bloomfield and travel frequently.
“With Karmanos’
 support and Ken’
s 
strength, we are hoping and planning for 
a great many years together,
” she said.
Schottenfels advises other caregivers to 
take care of themselves as they provide 
support for their ailing loved one. 
“The No. 1 thing for me is to take one 
day at a time,
” she said. “Seek and accept 
support. Be open to new activities and 
stress relievers. We do appreciate the 
wrap-around services that Karmanos 
provides.
” ■

 

Karmanos’
 Caregivers Support Group is 

supported by the Community Foundation for 

Southeast Michigan and the Ralph C. Wilson Jr. 
 

Legacy Funds. To learn more, contact Kathleen 

Hardy at (248) 538-4712 or email hardyk@

karmanos.org. 

‘One Day at a Time’

Couple fi
 nd support groups offer perspective, empathy to caregivers and patients. 

ELIZABETH KATZ SPECIAL TO THE JEWISH NEWS

Ken Knoppow and his wife, 

Mary Sue Schottenfels

SEAN COOK

health

