18 July 4 • 2019
jn

T

he first-floor conference room 
at the Hyatt Hotel in Royal Oak 
was abuzz with activity the eve-
ning of Saturday, May 18. In the lobby, 
the scent of hairspray and perfume was 
overwhelming as teenage girls and boys 
milled around in their most glamorous 
attire. 
It was prom night, but this was no 
ordinary prom. The 151 teenagers in 
attendance all had one thing in com-
mon: they are battling life-limiting 
illness. 
The event is hosted annually by Wish 
Upon a Teen, a nationwide nonprofit 
organization dedicated to providing 
age-appropriate programming for teen-
agers with life-limiting conditions. This 
age group is often overlooked in the 
medical community. 
Alissa Toby Bandalene of Sylvan Lake 
sat at the back of the hotel conference 
room getting her makeup finished by the 

mother of Miss Teen Michigan, who was 
also in attendance. As she had makeup 
applied to her eyelids, Alissa said, “It’
s 
nice to wear makeup because when you 
spend most of your time at school or the 
hospital you don’
t really have an excuse 
to dress up.
” 
Alissa has Ehlers-Danlos syndrome 
and lupus and is attending her fourth 
Wish Upon a Teen prom. She learned 
about the organization and the prom 
after having a severe flare-up in her con-
dition that landed her in the hospital for 
nearly a year. During this time, Alissa 
was unable to attend school and had 
nowhere to go and nothing to do. Her 
mother ran across Wish Upon a Teen 
and Alissa became involved in the orga-
nization, attending events such as prom, 
spa days and cooking programs.
“I think the prom and the organiza-
tion overall are incredibly important 
because there are organizations for chil-

dren, there are organizations for adults 
and for cancer patients, but, if you don’
t 
fall into any of these categories, you are 
a medical outcast and you are ignored,
” 
Alissa said. 
Prom is Alissa’
s favorite event hosted 
by Wish Upon a Teen. This year, it was 
held in the lobby of the Emagine Royal 
Oak, which was complete with decora-
tions, lights, music and food. 
“Regular prom is really difficult when 
you are sick,
” she said. After her flare-up, 
Alissa attended prom at her high school 
in a wheelchair. “It was miserable. I was 
in the corner and nobody came up to 
me. I couldn’
t get on the dance floor 
because of the wheelchair,
” she said.
In contrast to this first prom expe-
rience, Alissa said her first prom with 
Wish Upon a Teen was “incredible.
” The 
difference, she explained, is that at a 
normal prom everyone expects you to be 
partying and having the time of your life, 
whereas this prom is a celebration of life.
“Everyone understands what you’
re 
going through,
” she said. “If you aren’
t 
feeling well, someone will come up to 
you. No one is going to judge you.
”
Alissa also talked about how Judaism 
and her faith have impacted her life and 
medical journey. 
“The year before my flare-up, I went 
on Birthright,
” Alissa said. “I was able 
to pray at the Western Wall, which was 
a big deal for me because I have had 
serious medical issues since I was 14 
and didn’
t think I would ever be able to 
go. I think about that a lot when I’
m not 
doing well, and I hope I can go back one 
day.
”

JOINING FORCES
The prom was sponsored by the 95.5 
FM radio show “Mojo in the Morning” 
as well as the Center for Special Needs 
at the Jewish Community Center. The 
special needs program became involved 
in Wish Upon a Teen because its found-
er, Michelle Soto, has a son with autism 
who is a part of the JCC program. The 
special needs program and various other 
JCC programs helped put together gift 
bags and arrange services for the Wish 
Upon a Teen prom event.
Both Special Needs and Wish Upon a 
Teen recognize the importance of having 
age-appropriate programming for teens 
and young adults with medical issues. 
JCC Special Needs reaches people ages 
3-27 through programming as well as 
social groups for those age 16+ every 
other Thursday. This activity allows 
attendees to be treated as mature adults. 
Similarly, Wish Upon a Teen allows 
teens with medical issues to feel as 
though they are independent.
“There is a whole population of peo-
ple who are just ignored,
” Alissa said. “It’
s 
such an awkward age to have a chronic 
illness because you’
re trying to start a 
young adult life but most of us are still 
living with our parents and being cared 
for. Wish Upon a Teen and events like 
this help ease that feeling of being treat-
ed like a child.
”
Alissa credits Wish Upon a Teen for 
helping fill a void in the medical com-
munity for young adults with chronic 
illness. 
“
A lot of us are too sick to live on our 
own and have social interactions so 
events like this are really important for 
our lives because social interactions and 
friends are really what keep you going,
” 
Alissa said. ■

Prom Time
Wish Upon a Teen 
 offers a classic experience 
to those with life-limiting illnesses.

JESSIE COHEN JN INTERN

Alissa Bandalene of Sylvan Lake gets 

her hair and makeup done prior to the 

Wish Upon a Teen annual prom. 

Out on the dance floor at 
the Emagine Royal Oak, 
amid the lights and music, 
Alissa Bandalene enjoys 
herself with friends.

Alissa Bandalene in her beaded gown 

is ready for some fun.

PHOTOS BY HEATHER CHEN

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in 
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