L

ove is not just for Valentine’
s Day. Love can 
happen when you least expect it, as in the 
case of these two couples who share their 
stories with us. 
Nancy and Manny Kalef are part of a love tri-
angle.
They love each other without reservation — 
and they love the Meer Apartments, a senior 
community in West Bloomfield managed by 
Jewish Senior Life, where they’
ve lived for almost 
three years. 
Both Nancy and Manny married young. His 
first marriage ended after 27 years when he lost 
his first wife to cancer; hers ended after 22 years 
in divorce. 
Manny, 89, graduated from Cass Tech in 
Detroit and then earned a degree in accounting 
after attending night classes at Wayne State for 13 
years. He worked for Domestic Linen Supply for 
64 years, starting as a clerk and retiring as vice 
president for finance.
Nancy, 85, graduated from Detroit’
s Mackenzie 
High. She started nursing training at Grace 
Hospital but was forced to drop out after one year 
when she married. Her 60-year career included 
jobs in office management and human resources. 
Before she retired, in 2001, she ran her own infor-
mation technology recruitment agency.
She and her husband knew Manny and his 
wife, Joan, through Centennial B’
nai B’
rith.
Nancy divorced soon after the wedding of their 
only child. About five years later, she ran into 
Manny at the grocery store and noticed how sad 
he looked. She asked about his social life, and he 
said he wasn’
t dating much. She offered to go out 
to dinner with him to show him that it wasn’
t dif-
ficult. They went to Steak & Ale on Northwestern 
Highway the next day, then watched a movie in 
her apartment.
As they parted, Nancy asked Manny if she 
could give him a hug, and he started to cry; he 
hadn’
t had a meaningful relationship with a 
woman since Joan died.
They’
ve been together ever since, marrying on 
June 3, 1979, at Congregation B’
nai David. Nancy 
says the secret to their relationship is advice she 

recently passed on to a granddaughter before her 
wedding: Always try to please your partner at 
least 51 percent of the time.
Nancy has one daughter, Judy Lipson, as 
does Manny, Ellen Feldman (another daugh-
ter, Andrea, died at age 34); the daughters have 
become good friends. Between them, the Kalefs 
have six grandchildren and nine great-grands. 
After marrying, the Kalefs lived in a small 
Southfield condominium complex for 37 years. 
She was president of the self-managed homeown-
ers’
 association and he was treasurer. By 2016, 
they were both tired of the responsibility.
They looked at some other retirement com-
munities but knew they wanted to live in a 
Jewish environment. When they saw their Meer 
Apartments unit for the first time and realized 
the dents in the carpet would fit their furniture, 
they knew they’
d found their bashert (meant to 
be) home.
Their two-bedroom, two-bath apartment can 
accommodate Manny’
s treadmill and office space. 
Their small balcony overlooks a wetland. Meer, 
on the Jewish Community Campus, provides 
dinner five nights a week and a wealth of social 
programs for residents of its 198 units.
The Kalefs didn’
t know many of their neigh-
bors when they moved in, but they’
ve become 
an important part of the community; Nancy is 
secretary of the residents’
 council, and the Kalefs 
coordinate the building’
s recycling program.
“We know this is the last place we are going to 
live together, and that one of us will be left alone,
” 
Nancy said. “We are gung-ho on the building and 
on Jewish Senior Life. This is the place to be at 
our age.
”

CARRIE GILL & STEVE LUDWIG
In many ways, Carrie Gill and Steve Ludwig are a 
typical married couple.
They hold hands while they cuddle on the 
couch to watch TV in their Farmington Hills 
apartment. She tells him how to fold the sheets 
and where to put them away and makes sure his 
work uniform is on straight.
But Carrie and Steve have developmental dis-
abilities and need help from the state and JARC, a 
Jewish-founded agency, to live together.
They met at a Halloween dance at the Troy 
Community Center. Carrie wore a bunny cos-
tume and Steve thought she was cute. Steve was 

12 Febraury 14 • 2019
jn

BARBARA LEWIS CONTRIBUTING WRITER
Love Birds

jews d
in 
the
Valentine’
s Day

TOP TO BOTTOM: Nancy and Manny Kalef in their home 

at Meer Apartments; Manny and Nancy at their wedding, 

June 3, 1979. 

Shining a spotlight on loving couples
at JSL and JARC.

continued on page 14

PHOTOS BY ANTHONY LANZILOTE.

JN 

