jews in the d

continued from page 18

GARY GRAFF

Gary Graff grew up in Squirrel Hill.
He grew up at the Tree of Life syn-
agogue. He went to Hebrew school
there, was a bar mitzvah there,
confirmed there. His family was
active in the congregation and the Jewish commu-
nity. They owned Prime Kosher Foods, the only
kosher market in the area, and Graff ’s mother was
Pittsburgh’s Renta Yenta, planning most of the
local bar mitzvahs.
“Between those two things, we knew most of
the community,” says Graff, 57, and a Beverly
Hills resident.
“It’s a very, very tight community, both Jewish
and overall,” he says. “But the Jewish community
— generations of families live in the same house;
the houses just get passed down to family mem-
bers. Everyone knows everyone. It’s really remark-
able how close of a community it is.”
Graff, a music journalist who has contributed to
the JN, says his parents’ memorial plaques are at
Tree of Life.
“I have family members still there, cousins,”
he says. “I have a 95-year-old cousin who goes to
shul there every week. He’s elderly, so he depends
on the community for rides. Saturday, his ride was
running late, so by the time he arrived everything
was closed off. Given the ages of the victims, he
could easily have been sitting with them.
“I spent so much time in that building,” Graff
says. “I wasn’t there during the shooting, but I can
imagine it; I know it so well. The area where the
shooting took place was my Hebrew school class
when I was there.
“It was — and is — such a vibrant community.
To a Jewish population so suburban [like Metro
Detroit], it would be hard to imagine what a
unique environment it was and is,” Graff says.
“Everything was so intertwined, the families and
the other synagogues. Where the vigils were held
Saturday night, it’s like a village square.
“I knew five or six of the victims — from the
time going back to the kosher supermarket. I
remember [97-year-old] Rose Mallinger. The first
to be identified was the son of one of my dad’s
best Army buddies. He just became a grandfather;
I helped his family move into his house. These are
all people who were fixtures in the community. I
remember them all.
“I just keep going from very deep sorrow to
great anger.”
Graff, a Shabbat usher at Adat Shalom, was at
shul Saturday morning as his congregation cele-
brated its 75th anniversary.
“I shared a good cry with [a fellow Squirrel Hill
native] at shul Saturday night.
“It could be anywhere, anytime,” he says. “It’s
haunting.”

— Lynne Konstantin, Arts editor

20

November 1 • 2018

jn

Shabbat
Solidarity:
Motor City
Stands with
Steel City

JEFF
LASDAY

Saturday night I was
sitting in my son
David’s apartment
in Tel Aviv when my
brother Mike received a text from
a friend asking if he and all the
family were OK. This is how we
learned of the tragedy unfolding in
Pittsburgh. We immediately turned
on the TV. All of Israel watched the
news from Pittsburgh. For my fam-
ily, this was very, very personal.
For Lori and me, Pittsburgh —
Squirrel Hill — is home. It’s where
we grew up. My mom, mother-
in-law, aunts, uncles, cousins,
nephews and nieces all still live in

CAROL
SUBAR
YOFFEE

Five years ago, Carol
Subar Yoffee found
a lot of comfort from her Squirrel
Hill neighbor Cecil Rosenthal,
who made a point of repeated-
ly participating with the shivah
minyan coming together after
the death of her father, Seymour
Subar.
Now, Yoffee is determined to
muster the strength needed to
comfort the Rosenthal family as
they mourn the tragic loss of both
Cecil and his brother, David, bru-
tally murdered at the Tree of Life.
Yoffee, who grew up in Detroit

The Jewish Federation of Metropolitan
Detroit announced a Shabbat Solidarity
event the weekend of Nov. 2-3 at
congregations throughout the area
in memory of the victims from the
shooting last Shabbat at Tree of Life
Congregation in Pittsburgh.
Congregations across Jewish Detroit
— and throughout the nation — will
host a special Shabbat service to
remember the 11 Jews killed at the
Squirrel Hill community synagogue.
Help honor their memory and
repudiate the poisonous legacy of
anti-Semitism by filling our congrega-
tions during Shabbat as a proud and
unified community.
A list of local congregations can be

found at jewishdetroit.org/resources/
congregations.
There is no cost, nor do you need to
be a member to attend. Visit the con-
gregation websites to confirm location
and times of Shabbat services.
If you would like to contribute
to Jewish Federation of Greater
Pittsburgh’s Victims of Terror Fund, go
to https://jewishpgh.org/our-victims-
of-terror-fund. All funds collected are
earmarked for psychological services,
support for families, general services,
reconstruction, additional security
throughout the community, medical
bills for all those involved, as well as
counseling and other services that may
prove necessary in the future.

Squirrel Hill.
Squirrel Hill is this amaz-
ing neighborhood in the city of
Pittsburgh that for more than 100
years has been the center of the
Pittsburgh Jewish community.
Squirrel Hill is like a combination
of the best from West Bloomfield,
Birmingham, Huntington Hoods
and Oak Park all squished togeth-
er. Dozens of synagogues, at least
three Jewish day schools, the JCC
and other Jewish institutions all
can be found in walking distance
all over Squirrel Hill. Walking dis-
tance from Tree of Life.
Tree of Life Congregation also
houses two other synagogues:
Dor Hadash, a Reconstructionist
congregation, and New Light, a
Conservative congregation. My

cousin Anne Caplan led services
at New Light Friday night. My
aunt and uncle are co-presidents
of New Light. I grew up with the
rabbi of Dor Hadash. The educa-
tion director of Tree of Life was
one of my youth group kids and
now a family friend. The murderer
entered the Tree of Life building
and went from room to room mur-
dering people from each of these
three congregations — 11 senseless
deaths born from hate.
Pittsburgh, like Detroit, is a very
connected Jewish community. I
grieve with the Jewish community
of Pittsburgh. This happened in my
home. Home, the place where you
are supposed to be safe and secure.

and Southfield, was in Maryland
with her husband when her cell
phone started bringing in the
news of the violence she never
would have expected in the quiet
neighborhood that has been her
home for 30 years.
“People called and texted to find
out how we were,” she explained.
“Although we don’t belong to the
synagogue where the shooting
took place, we are a close and
cohesive community. Anybody
who walks or drives there will see
yard signs in different languages
that say, ‘No matter where you’re
from, you’re welcome here.’”
It was Sunday morning when
the shock and sadness deepened
for the Yoffees as they found out
who had died. Irving Younger was
another friend known through

real estate work. Melvin Wax had
been a member of Congregation
Beth Shalom, where the Yoffees
belong.
Yoffee, whose mother, Phyllis
Subar, lives in West Bloomfield,
felt some irony as an administra-
tor at the Community Day School
near the synagogue where the kill-
ings occurred. Just four days earli-
er, students went through a drill to
prepare for a dangerous intruder.
“As we return home, we are
making every effort to be strong
as the community comes togeth-
er,” Yoffee said. “I know we will
be there for each other and stand
shoulder to shoulder while trying
to eradicate hatred.”

Lasday is COO of Detroit’s Jewish
Community Center.

— Suzanne Chessler,
Contributing Writer