Rosh Hashanah
continued from page 13
petite essays
In other words, what do we really want
forgiveness from?
For the sin of pushing You away when
I need you the most.
And for the sin of thinking that you have
abandoned me.
For the sin of not looking in my partner’s
eyes and telling that person how much
I love him or her.
And for the sin of not reaching out for my
partner’s hand.
For the sin of missing the beauty of the world
and the universe because I am too distracted.
And for the sin of taking for granted the gift
of all life, including my own.
For the sin of wasting precious time that
is given to me.
And for the sin of thinking when I
was younger and healthier that I would l
live forever.
For the sin of only giving, but not receiving.
And for the sin of only receiving,
but not giving.
For the sin of not reaching out to
friends and family.
And for the sin of rebuffi ng their eff orts.
For all these, God of pardon, pardon us,
forgive us, atone for us.
For the sin of thinking I cannot make
a diff erence.
And for the sin of acting like I cannot
make a diff erence.
For the sin of not truly, deeply listening
to my children and my spouse or partner
when I am tired and wrapped up
in my own problems.
And for the sin of thinking that my input
was not important.
For the sin of thinking I have to be perfect.
And for the sin of not trying my hardest.
For the sin of not listening to the sounds
around me,
And for the sin of acting like the sounds
from my mouth are all that is important
to be heard.
For the sin of closing my heart to
the needs of others.
And for the sin of closing my heart to You.
For the sin of thinking I am alone.
And for the sin of acting like I am.
For all these, God of pardon, pardon us,
forgive us, atone for us.
14
September 6 • 2018
jn
What if we all
knew our time was
growing short?
What would our
focus be in prayer?
— STEPHEN GOLDMAN
To me, at this Yom Kippur, in addi-
tion to the classic words of Al Chet,
these words will be upon my heart,
upon my soul and upon my lips. I
know that others, like me, who are
facing the end of their lives may add
or subtract to these prayers. That is
good, for all prayer is personal as well
as communal.
And so, at yontef this year, look
around you. Reach out to those who
are quietly living life as best they can.
Tears at Yom Kippur services are
not just for those who we know are
ill or who have passed into memory.
Sometimes tears are for ourselves, for
what we fear we will face in the year
ahead. Tears for who and what we
will leave behind. Tears that we will
be forgotten in the headlong rush of
time.
Tears from the struggle of trying to
find new meaning and relevance to a
service that has been so familiar but
now is seemingly different when our
days are numbered.
This Yom Kippur, let us pray for a
good year, a sweet year with our fam-
ily and friends. Let us pray that no
matter what circumstances we may
face, we will remember that teshu-
vah, like life itself, is a journey. And
let us pray that when our time comes
to leave this good Earth, we will fall
gently into God’s loving arms and
hear:
“Welcome home. You did well.
Salachti. You are forgiven.” •
Stephen Goldman, 60, and his wife, Deborah,
reside in Novi. He recently retired from his medical
practice in Novi where he specialized in osteo-
pathic manipulative medicine and sports medicine.
He is the author of many medical articles and
essays.
RABBI JOSEPH
KRAKOFF
JESSICA
HAYES
Make Each Day
Meaningful
Teaching To
Embrace Life
Growing up, I often won-
dered why Jews flocked to
the synagogue on the High
Holidays more than any
other time of the year. As
I got older, I realized it is
because on Rosh Hashanah/
Yom Kippur, we pray for
our very lives. We beg the
Almighty to give each of us a
one-year contract.
During these Days of Awe,
we acknowledge our mortal-
ity and the absolute fragility
of life as we are reminded
of the stark reality that, in
the coming year, some of us
will indeed die. As a child,
this concept and the final-
ity of it all shook me to my
core. I couldn’t imagine the
thought of not being with
my parents, grandparents,
siblings and friends, never to
see them again.
Now, working in end-of-
life care daily and holding
the hands of people as they
are dying, I have come to
understand death does not
have to be scary. One day
we all will die, but, until that
time comes, we should see
life is a gift and do our best
to make each day meaning-
ful. Knowing my time here
is limited inspires me to live
out my values and to create
a legacy for which I can be
eternally proud.
Quiet reflection often leads
me to think of beauti-
ful moments I have been
privileged to share with
patients and families. One
that will live in my memory
is of a beloved father and
patriarch of a strong family.
On this day, surrounded by
his children, grandchildren
and friends, Rabbi [E.B.
“Bunny”] Freedman prayed
for him, singing beautiful
songs at his bedside in his
final hours.
Not everyone gets to
be a part of such private,
beautiful moments when
family and friends gather
to celebrate a life well-lived
before it ends.
Hospice is not about
dying. It’s about the beauty
of living in the face of
mortality. I have learned
to become comfortable
with death and all that
surrounds it. To bear the
burden of those who suffer.
This is life unfiltered. As a
hospice nurse, I help shed
light on some of the dark-
est moment’s patients and
families may encounter. In
teaching them to embrace
these last few months,
weeks, days and hours, they
are able to change their
focus and spend irreplace-
able time reflecting on the
life before them.
Rabbi Joseph H. Krakoff of
West Bloomfield is senior
director of the Jewish Hospice
and Chaplaincy Network,
and co-author of the book
“Never Long Enough: Finding
Comfort and Hope Amidst
Grief and Loss.”
Jessica Hayes of Novi is
a nurse and manager at
Hospice of Michigan. HOM
works closely with Jewish
Hospice and Chaplaincy
Network to coordinate care
for shared patients and
families.