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“What I discovered was a historic opportunity to compile and
convey the Jewish concept of kindness that hadn’t presented itself
for many hundreds of years.”
— RABBI TZVI MULLER
The Ten “KINDmandments”
VI. Respect Others’ Good Will.
Be kindly disposed to others. Love,
respect and care for them. Recognize and
embrace the inherent lovability of others.
Create and cultivate a bond and an affinity
with them. Listen to them.
People give us their sympathy and
friendship when they perceive our friendly
intentions, pitiful circumstances or admirable
qualities. Don’t win their good will under
false pretenses. Don’t steal their hearts.
II. Use Pleasant Words.
VII. Be Truthful.
III. Reverse the Cycle of Hurt.
VIII.
Provide Corrective
Feedback and Advice.
Say things that make people feel good.
Avoid hurting people’s feelings. Anticipate
what may be hurtful to them. Protect them
from embarrassment and discomfort.
When someone does something hurtful
to you, react in a way that minimizes
the damage and begins to repair the
relationship. Affirm yourself, reach out
for conciliation and forgive, if appropriate.
IV. Give the Benefit of the Doubt.
Be generous in interpreting others’
words or actions. Don’t jump to negative
conclusions. Give people a chance to
explain themselves. Try to understand
their circumstances before pronouncing
judgment.
V. Be Helpful and Considerate.
Help others. Do unrandom acts of kindness.
Whether it’s a smile you proffer or a visit
to the sick, sharing and enhancing
someone’s joy or welcoming a stranger,
bring blessings to people’s lives.
Our knowledge of reality allows us to make
true and wise decisions. It provides an
accurate map for the route we want to
take. Giving others true information may
be the greatest gift we give.
All people have a blind spot. It may be
regarding a personal character deficiency
or a bad habit. It may be about issues they
face, and your advice could open their eyes.
Share your insight, if appropriate.
IX. Preserve Others’ Reputations.
A person’s reputation is often his/her
most valuable asset. Speak well of people.
Avoid spreading gossip and badmouthing.
Defend people when spoken ill of behind
their back.
X. Perform Charity.
Give an appropriate monetary gift or other
necessary items to the needy. Preserve the
dignity of the recipient. Feel good about
giving. The poor should find a friend in you.
ABOVE: Rabbi Muller created the “Ten KINDmandments” after an exhaustive study of ancient Jewish
texts. To receive a laminated copy by mail, email JewishValuesInstitute@gmail.com.
TOP: An overflow crowd listen to Rabbi Muller speak at the June 28 dedication ceremony of the
Blumenstein Jewish Learning Center.
12
July 26 • 2018
jn
to hire a professional curriculum writer
to make the coursework accessible to
Jewish educators across America and
beyond. He recently formulated the “Ten
KINDmandments” — in the spirit of the
Ten Commandments — that provide a
summary guide on how to live a life of
kindness in interpersonal relations.
Muller sees dual benefits in improving
one’s interpersonal relations. “When we
act with kindness,” he said, “it affirms the
respect we have for others. At the same
time, we are also respecting our own inner
humanity, the voice of goodness within us.”
NEW HEADQUARTERS
©JVI 2018, DESIGN BY FAYGIE BIENENFELD
I. Love Your Fellow as Yourself.
continued from page 10
With the Hyman and Sonia Blumenstein
Jewish Learning Center, the JVI has
found a new home. JVI has offices and
class space in the renovated former PNC
Bank building at 36300 Woodward Ave.,
a half-mile north of Maple, near where
Birmingham, Bloomfield Township and
Bloomfield Hills converge. The learning
center was dedicated June 28 (see adja-
cent story).
In addition to directing the Jewish
Values Institute, Muller, 42, the husband
of Rachaeli and father of six, serves as
the pulpit rabbi at the Birmingham-
Bloomfield Chai Center, a congregation
about a mile north of the learning center
on Woodward.
Muller teaches a free, walk-in series
on kindness at JVI at 7 p.m. Mondays.
Topics include “Judging Others Favorably,”
“Speaking the Truth” and “Bearing a
Grudge and Revenge.” Students at his lec-
tures learn the essence of kindness from
the ancient texts of Jewish sages as well as
from the rabbi’s sharp wit.
“These teachings enlighten us on how
to get along better and have more harmo-
nious relationships,” Muller said.
“For me, Rabbi Muller’s classes are
like a soul tune-up,” said Michal Miller of
Birmingham. “They always remind me to
see the good in others.”
Other students agree.
“Many people might think that kind-
ness is obvious,” Joe Falik of Huntington
Woods noted. “But you need to study the
texts Rabbi Muller provides.”
Michael Gerber of Waterford said,
“Rabbi Muller makes us aware of how
we might inadvertently hurt people, how
to avoid it and how to be better parents,
spouses and friends.”
Reva Klar of West Bloomfield also found
value. “I always learn something in Rabbi
Muller’s class that helps me become a bet-
ter person,” she said. •
For details on JVI or Rabbi Muller’s classes, visit
Jewish Values Institute on Facebook or contact him
at JewishValuesInstitute@gmail.com.