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sponsored
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continued from page 12
“Going to college is a huge transition … You have to be the best
possible version of yourself at all times. All of us know that
this pressure is way too much.”
— DIANE ORLEY, PARENT
Tips For
Students
• Make connections. Go to
Shabbat dinner at Hillel or Chabad.
Join a club or student group. Get
involved in dorm activities.
• If you need support, take
advantage of student groups such
as the Wolverine Support Network
or Spartan Support Network.
• Do not be afraid to seek coun-
seling at one of the student health
service facilities. If the wait is too
long, ask for a referral to a private
therapist near campus.
• Give yourself time to adjust to
campus life. Don’t join too many
clubs or take on too many extra-
curricular activities during the first
semester.
• Seek out guidance or advice
from older students who have
already been through what you are
facing.
• Have a plan when you go out
at night. If you are going to a party,
go with a friend. If you don’t like
the atmosphere, leave early.
• Plan your schedule to allow a
balance between school work and
social activities.
• Take time for self-care: eat
healthy foods, exercise, get enough
sleep.
• Be kind to yourself. Use a
mantra or a list of positive affirma-
tions instead of criticizing yourself.
• Avoid numbing behaviors such
as excessive use of social media,
drinking, drugs or junk food.
• Use stress management tools
such as listening to soothing music,
spending time in nature, exercising
or meditating.
• If a friend is suicidal, help
them connect with family, a resi-
dent adviser, counselor or another
trusted adult.
• Realize what is true today is
not necessarily true tomorrow.
Whatever is causing stress today
will not last forever.
given them security,” Kaplan said. “Many
teens are facing things they’ve never been
exposed to — new friends, new surround-
ings, being away from their usual comforts,
even their pets — and it can be hard.”
She believes some parents exacerbate
the situation by doing too much for their
children, which prevents them from
developing necessary coping and problem-
solving skills.
“Kids are more intelligent but more
emotionally immature than in the past,”
Kaplan observes. “There is a dependency
that gets nurtured because parents are
over-protective.”
She encourages parents to validate their
kids’ emotions and feelings and be sup-
portive without overreacting and jumping
in to “fix” their problems.
EMBRACING CHANGE
After attending Hillel Day School and
Frankel Jewish Academy, Paul Schmitz
decided to leave his comfort zone when he
began his freshman year at the University
of Michigan’s Ross School of Business last
fall. Instead of rooming with one of the
friends he had grown up with, he chose to
room blind, using a university Facebook
page to find a compatible roommate.
“I decided to completely branch out
and have an open mind,” said Schmitz of
Farmington Hills. “It was a very dramatic
change; I had the same friend group for
12 years. A lot of people are not used to
change — I decided to embrace change.”
He joined a fraternity with students he
had not known before and got involved in
continued on page 16
U-M student Paul Schmitz in his dorm room
14
May 24 • 2018
jn
the university’s very active Hillel program,
which provided a tight-knit community
within a big school. He became involved
in some of the student groups, including
the freshman engagement committee,
Wolverines for Israel and Wolvpack.
Schmitz hit a bump in the road when
he failed to get into any of the clubs he
had applied to within the Ross School of
Business. Although he knew admission
into these clubs was highly competitive,
the rejection was hard for him to digest.
“It took a toll; I thought I wasn’t good
enough,” Schmitz said.
To help him cope, he turned to the
Wolverine Support Network (WSN), which
consists of small peer-led support groups
and campus events.
“I think everyone should get involved. I
plan to be a leader (in WSN) one day. You
can talk about anything,” said Schmitz.
He has since joined a business fraternity
and a club within the business school,
where he holds a leadership position. “It’s
not the most prestigious
club, but I’m making
the best of it, and that’s
what every kid needs to
do,” he said.
A major advocate for
WSN and for expanding
mental health services
on college campuses is
Diane Orley
Diane Orley, who lost
her son George to sui-
cide at the beginning of
his junior year at U-M.
“Going to college is a huge transition,”