rosh hashanah Rabbinic Greetings for 5778 Vulnerability Makes Us Human O tion up north, a quiet moment put- n Rosh Hashanah, we ask ting your child to bed, a wonderful ourselves: Am I the type of phone call with someone you hadn’t person I really want to be? spoken to in months. And Am I treating my loved ones the worst memories — with empathy and respect? missing a birthday party What about those outside because of a last-minute of my close-knit group of work obligation, speaking friends and family — who harsh words to a loved one am I to them? How can I that you instantly regretted, be better, stronger, kinder, feeling rejected or judged by more present? someone you look up to. Most of our introspection Relationship-making and during the holidays involves Rabbi Jenifer connecting with others is relationships — relation- Lader at the heart of so much of ships with God, yes, but what sustains us, both for perhaps more importantly, pleasure and in the context relationships with oth- of our professional lives. It ers. When we delve deep inside ourselves to consider how we can also be a source of great pain to us, as it requires us to be vulner- can improve in the year to come, I’d able to truly open ourselves up to venture to bet that most of those the possibilities of connecting more painful pangs of regret are about deeply with others. how we acted in the relationships In her recent book, Daring that are important to us. Greatly, Dr. Brene Brown discovered Think about the best memories something odd while researching you’ve had all year — a great meal out with your friends, a family vaca- the subject of vulnerability. She asked her patients for a list of the things that made them feel the most vulnerable. At first, they answered in the obvious ways, citing things like sickness, loss of a loved one, loss of a job and divorce. But when pushed harder, this is what she found: • Standing over a sleeping child • Loving my job • Spending time with my parents • Going into remission • Getting promoted • Falling in love This is it, everyone. This is what matters. This sense of vulnerability is what makes us human. It’s what makes us real. It’s what makes us Jewish. As we head into the New Year, may we find new ways to be with each other, to be there for each other and to truly see each other. And, in this way, may it be for each of us a year of love and life. • Jennifer Lader is a rabbi at Temple Israe in West Bloomfield. Happy Thanksgiving H appy Thanksgiving! Yes, you The rabbis of the Midrash asked read correctly. As we enter whether sacrifices and prayer the period of the Yamim would be offered during the Noraim, the Days of Awe, where Messianic Age. Their answer is should our focus be? Of course, found in the Midrash known as the this is a time for prayer Pesikta D’Rav Kahana. and introspection; it is “Rabbi Pinchas, Rabbi certainly important that Levi and Rabbi Yochanan we are able to spend time cite in the name of with family and friends. It Rabbi Menachem: ‘In the is also a time for thanks- time to come, all sacri- giving. fices will cease except the Giving thanks is not Thanksgiving offering; all often associated with prayers will cease, except Rabbi Robert Rosh Hashanah or Yom the prayer of Thanksgiving, Kippur, but there is a very Gamer which will never cease.’” important connection. (Piska 9:12) This is an incredible statement given the vast body of prayers we have. Instead of choosing a prayer such as the Shema, Aleinu, Ashrei or the Kedushah, they chose the prayer of Thanksgiving. We can find a blessing of Thanksgiving, the “Modim” blessing, as part of every Amidah, which we recite daily in the morning, afternoon and eve- ning. The blessing is found as part of every Amidah throughout the year and helps form the core of our prayer services. As part of the blessing we say, “We thank You and sing Your praises — for our lives that are in continued on page 68 66 September 14 • 2017 jn The Wake-Up Call M other: “Come on, Victor, you have to get out of bed or you’ll be late for school.” Victor: “Mom, do I have to? All the teachers hate me, and all the students hate me, too.” Mother: “Yes, you do.” Victor: “Give me one good reason.” Mother: “Because you’re 47 years old and you’re the principal.” How did you wake up this morning? Who woke you Rabbi Yisrael up? What woke you up? Pinson Were you ready to wake up? Did you want to wake up? COMPARE THESE TWO SCENARIOS: An inmate in a Russian gulag is rudely awoken by the nachalnik before dawn. The inmate will spend the day in hard labor without proper clothing and adequate nutrition. There is nothing for him to look forward to, nevertheless he jumps out of bed and gets ready as fast as he possibly can. He is motivated by fear; if he doesn’t get up, he will be severely punished. A young girl living in a warm home in a safe neighborhood is gently awoken by her mother. It’s really early, but her mother tells her that she must wake up. The whole family is going to the airport to catch an early flight to Orlando. The girl jumps out of bed and gets ready as fast as she possibly can. She is motivated by joy, she is going to spend a week in Disney World with her family! Maimonides in the Laws of Teshuva states: Although the sounding of the shofar on Rosh Hashanah is a Torah decree, there is an allu- sion in it as well. It says: “Be roused, sleep- ers, from your sleep, and slumberers, wake from your slumber; search your deeds and return in teshuvah …” How does the Shofar awake you? Is it a soft and gentle call coming from a loving and caring source? Is it a harsh and rude awakening coming from a punishing and controlling source? Is the call of the shofar a terrifying reminder of how bad you have acted or an encouraging and supportive reminder of how awesome you can be? Is the shofar just telling you what you ought to do, or is it also cheering you on, telling you that you can do? This Rosh Hashanah, whether you make it to synagogue or not, seek a way to fulfill the mitzvah of hearing the shofar. When you do, I wish for you that you can hear a sound of hope and encouragement coming to you from Above. I bless you that you feel as excited to tackle the year ahead as a little girl that was just woken up to go on her dream vacation. I pray that you be granted a sweet New Year 5778. • Yisrael Pinson is the rabbi of Chabad of Greater Downtown Detroit.