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OAK PARK BIRMINGHAM CLARKSTON NOVI PLYMOUTH UTICA ANN ARBOR
OAKLAND ALLERGY & ASTHMA CENTER
SPECIALIZING IN ADULT AND PEDIATRIC
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Thorny Shrubs Make
For Better Neighbors
Dear Debra
S
end your
questions to
deardebra@
renmedia.us.
DEAR DEBRA,
My neighbor’s
children use my
backyard as their
thoroughfare. And
Debra Darvick
if that is not bad
enough, recently
the daughter came
up and knocked on
my window while I
was watching TV. She scared the heck
out of me.
I have asked the mother to speak
to her children about boundaries and
that I do not want them crossing my
property again. And again, this eve-
ning, the mother and her son and dog
went waltzing through my backyard
as if they owned it.
Come fall I will plant shrubbery to
limit access, but how does one deal
with neighbors who have no regard
for other people’s privacy?
— Noxious Neighbors
— shrubbery that limits access. Try
some blackberry shrubs. They form
a dense thorny thicket which will
deter your noxious neighbors and
you can make jam with the berries.
Or try a hedge of holly. The plant’s
barbed leaves are no picnic in the
park to brush up against. And then
there is Pyracantha (Orange Glow)
which will offer you defense and
beauty. Not only does it have thorny
stems, but it flowers white in June
followed by beautiful clusters of
bright orange-red berries. I wish you
luck. There’s nothing worse than
neighbors who are anything but
neighborly.
DEAR DEBRA,
A cousin moved back to town a few
years ago after retiring and having
lived on the other side of the country
her entire adult life. I was very excited
to have her back in town. My husband
and I have invited her to our home
for many occasions and because she
doesn’t drive, he has also picked her
up and brought her home each time.
She always brings a hostess gift and
sends a thank-you card, but she has
never once reciprocated. You would
think after all these years, she would
have invited us for dinner in her home
at least once. But no. What’s up with
some people?
— Uninvited
DEAR UNINVITED,
DEAR NOXIOUS NEIGHBORS,
30/%"#"3",/033*4 M.D.
Board Certified in Allergy
and Immunology
University of Michigan
Medical School
Over 25 years experience
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www.oaklandallergy.com
There is much wisdom in the old
saw, “Good fences make good
neighbors.” It’s a pity so many com-
munities forbid them. Although
you didn’t say, I wonder why these
miscreants can’t get where they are
going using the public spaces — as
in the sidewalk or road — in front of
your homes.
Since you’ve tried the polite route
and gotten nowhere, can you turn
on your sprinkler during the times
they tend to trespass? Part of me
would like to suggest turning a
water cannon or super soaker on
them, but I’ll override that impulse.
If you cannot install a fence,
barbed wire or otherwise, your best
bet is to do what you already plan
Judaism values hachnasat orchim
(hospitality to guests) so greatly that
it is a mitzvah (commandment) to
welcome guests into our homes.
Abraham and Sarah are our first
hospitality role models. Abraham
sits at the entrance of his tent in the
heat of the day when he sees three
men approaching. He runs to greet
them, bows, offers to wash their feet
and bring them a bit of bread. He
then rushes to Sarah’s tent to have
her prepare food for them and then
goes and finds a calf to be prepared
as well. (And remember, in the prior
week’s portion Abraham had just
circumcised himself !)
From these actions, we learn that
we are to meet and welcome our
guests and move with haste to make
them feel comfortable and well
fed. Interesting to note that while
Abraham offered his visitors bread,
he brought them a full meal. Had he
offered bread, curds and meat they
continued on page 48
46
September 14 • 2017
jn