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Car Keys

When your senior loved one should not drive…
What can you do to help?

Maureen McDonald ͮŽŶƚƌŝďƵƟŶŐtƌŝƚĞƌ
Photos by Jerry Zolynsky

Above: Nurse Kevin Snycerski of Livonia talks with Trudy Gilpin of the Botsford
Commons in Farmington Hills.

T

he first conversation with your
“The issue won’t go away on its
elderly loved one about safety
own, so keep trying,” says Barbara
and driving needs to happen
Roden, owner of Senior Helpers in
long before driving becomes a
Farmington Hills and Grosse Pointe.
problem.
Barbara’s company specializes in
Before your elder gets in a car
caring for those with dementia
accident, runs over the neighbor’s
and other ailments that could
cat or crunches the bumper of his
compromise a driver’s integrity.
vehicle, the family needs to discuss
You want to collect detailed
options with care and compassion
records of traffic violations, minor
for the role a car plays in self-esteem,
accidents and any other situations
independence and transportation.
that cause worry, like getting lost
This is tough love; you must respect
along familiar routes.
this individual’s maturity and guide
“Don’t blame yourself if initial
them to a place of safety.
conversations don’t go well.
Seniors over the age of 65 years
Imagine if you were told you
old have a 70 percent chance of being
couldn’t drive anywhere you
injured in a car accident. They are also
wanted to go when you’d done so
four times more likely to be seriously
for a lifetime,” Barbara said.
injured and hospitalized in an accident
No two families deal with
than a 16- to 24-year-old driver
transportation issues in the same
because their bones are often more
way. Experts at Senior Helpers
^ĞŶŝŽƌ,ĞůƉĞƌƐŽǁŶĞƌĂƌďĂƌĂZŽĚĞŶŽĨůŽŽŵĮĞůĚ,ŝůůƐ
brittle and their bodies less flexible
are glad to listen and make
and resilient.
recommendations. The ultimate
Any number of factors could impair driving including
goal is to avert problems, such as injury to the elder, to
changes in vision, range of motion that would inhibit the
innocent bystanders or property that would lead to formal
ability to check for blind spots, certain medications that
charges.
affect drowsiness and comprehension or a problem with
If the loved one flat out refuses, you may have to take
alcohol consumption. Also, dementia may come on slowly,
action to protect your loved one, especially if this person
affecting clarity and reaction time.
protests, “I only drive in the neighborhood.”
When you see early warning signs (see the list in this
Most accidents occur within five miles of home, so
article) you need to have a conversation — or series of
driving short distances could be perilous. You can get a
conversations. You must be very careful — and tactful
note from the family doctor saying this individual can’t
— to balance your concerns with your elder’s sense of
drive anymore. You can hide the car keys — or the car itself.
independence and maturity. Driving is viewed as a ticket to
One individual took the car to a storage company and paid
freedom.
a monthly fee to keep the vehicle out of access to an elder
A spouse is often the best person to approach first,
alcoholic.
especially if this is someone with tact and history who
Appeal to your elder’s pocketbook — break down the
can frame the dilemma in an understandable manner.
cost of owning and maintaining a car and compare that
Others may listen better to a voice of authority, such as
to the cost of a taxi service, senior citizen bus or retaining
a rabbi or physician.
a professional caregiver to assist, such as Senior Helpers.
If the individual doesn’t listen, you may have to go to the
agency that authorizes driver’s licenses.
12 Signs of Elders’ Driving Problems
The Michigan Secretary of State has a form to request a
driver evaluation. A relative can submit the form; it cannot
ͻ Riding over lawns/curbs/gardens
be anonymous but the office will keep it confidential.
ͻ Trouble navigating turns
A road test may be the formal decider of whether the
individual can drive or not.
ͻ Moving into a wrong lane
Keep alternatives in mind. Senior Helpers has caregivers
ͻ Parking inappropriately
that can drive your loved ones to medical appointments,
ͻ Driving too fast/too slow
grocery shopping and other errands. They can also
ͻ Delayed responses to unexpected situations
make other recommendations to assist your loved one.
ͻ Not paying attention/falling asleep at wheel
Relatives can team up to give rides, which is a chance for
intergenerational conversations that warm the heart for
ͻ Increased agitation or irritation when driving
years to come.
ͻ Scrapes or dents on car, garage or mailbox
Barbara recalls having the conversation with her father
ͻ Car accident
who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. When she told him the
ͻ Ticketed — moving violations or warnings
doctors said he shouldn’t drive any longer, her father said,
ͻ Confusing brake and gas pedals
“So what. They don’t know what they are talking about.”

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(a device used to help get people out of bed)
are Client Care Coordinator Vanessa Cross of
>ŝǀŽŶŝĂ͕ǆĞĐƵƟǀĞƐƐŝƐƚĂŶƚ<ŝĂŶĂ^ĐŚƵƐƚĞƌŽĨ
Redford and Client Care Coordinator Chloe
Stoner from Clawson.

Senior Helper Marla
Walters of Novi and
Enid Cherniak of West
ůŽŽŵĮĞůĚƐŚĂƌĞĂ
moment on Cherniak’s
couch.

They had to gradually take away the keys through
techniques like asking friends to take him places and
suggesting they would like to drive him places because his
car is so nice.
Senior Helpers’ 10 years of success in Michigan is fueled
by its more caring approach to elder care. Barbara and
her staff specialize in caring for those with dementia and
also work with many other clients, including those with
multiple sclerosis, cancer or heart disease. The company
will come to your home, meet with your family and make
recommendations for ongoing care such as laundry, meal
preparation, shower assistance, dressing, toileting and
coordinating transportation.
The company aims to be a resource provider in other
ways as well. The staff will work to connect clients with
the answers and referrals they need to provide the best
possible care. “I cannot imagine a better way to serve my
community and help families,” says Barbara.
Senior Helpers is also unique in its selection and training
of staff. All employees have prior experience in caregiving,
either professionally or in their personal lives. They go
through rigorous screenings and background checks, and
are bonded and insured. Caregivers must have a valid
driver’s license, auto insurance and reliable transportation.
Each employee must demonstrate a compassionate
personality.
“We are caring individuals,” Barbara said. “As the owner,
I have a real compassion for both our clients and staff.
Everyone here has a caring heart. Our clients stay with us
because they know we care.”

Senior Helpers

^ĞŶŝŽƌ,ĞůƉĞƌƐŚĂƐƚǁŽůŽĐĂƟŽŶƐƚŽƐĞƌǀĞǇŽƵ͗

Oakland and Western Wayne County:
28200 Orchard Lake, Suite 111
Farmington Hill, MI 48334
Offi ce: (248) 865-1000

Eastern Wayne and Macomb County
18080 Mack Ave.
Grosse Pointe, MI, 48230
Offi ce: (313) 885-0600

December 29 • 2016

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