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Cousin Mother And Cousin Dad

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M

ost children I grew
somewhere, dad doesn’t gain cousin
up with had, say, a
rank with Delores but holds as uncle
Grandma Goldberg
while mother moves on from cousin
and a Grandma Rabinowitz. But
to become Delores’ aunt.
my sisters and I had grandmothers
OK, so mother is Delores’ aunt.
who were named for the streets
Do mother’s parents, who had been
they lived on.
Delores’ cousins, become her great-
There was Grandma on Tuxedo
aunt and great-uncle? Or are they still
Norman Prady
and there was Grandma on
cousins?
Webb. We couldn’t call them by
Well, consider Delores’ own
their first or last names. They
uncertainty. Her recently found
both were Grandma Prady. And both were
thank-you note for a wedding shower gift
Grandma Julia.
from mother’s parents was not addressed
“No, dear,” a teacher would say, “what
to “Dear Cousins Julia and Reuben” nor to
we need is your mother’s name before she
“Dear Aunt Julia and Uncle Reuben” but
was married. Now here’s a fresh card, dear. noncommittally to “Dear Mr. and Mrs.
Start over.”
Prady.”
“It was Mildred Prady,” I’d say.
Bans of cousin-marriage in some states
“Well, for two people named Prady to
rarely were enforced, if ever. But the roman-
meet and marry, they’d have to be — uh —
tic tale of our parents’ union was that they
related. Uh.”
weren’t allowed to marry in Michigan so
“They’re cousins,” I’d say.
they crossed the Detroit River to
“Well, not, not first cousins,”
Windsor, Ontario, and were mar-
the teacher might say, gasping.
ried by a Catholic priest who was
“First cousins,” I’d say.
said to be captivated by the young
“Uh. Oh.”
lovers standing at his church
Our grandfathers, husbands
door and was thus willing to
of the Julias, were brothers.
defy whatever prohibitions there
Mother’s father, Reuben. Dad’s
might be to their marrying and
father, Joseph. Both — along
heading off for their Niagara Falls
with their siblings Samuel,
honeymoon.
Joshua, Rachel and others
A tender and dreamy story,
unknown to us — were the late- David Preide
indeed, that my sisters and I long
19th century offspring
delighted in. But it fizzled
of David Preide of
the day I found their mar-
Riga, Latvia, and wife
riage license — signed
No. 1 or wife No. 2, or
somewhere in Detroit on
some of each.
June 8, 1927, by Rabbi
Family members,
Aaron M. Ashivsky and
previously with clear
witnessed by J. Rachowsky
status as aunt or uncle
and S. Chinitz.
or cousin, now had
As for my sisters, Audrey
to fathom newly con-
and Barbara, and me, we
structed relationships
were cousins to each other
because of the mar-
and cousins to each of our
riage.
parents. We even were
Mildred’s and
cousins to ourselves. I’m
Calvin’s siblings, who’d
my own cousin. I might
always been cousins to
also be my own uncle.
each other, now were
Found along with my
Cousins Calvin Prady, 24, and
in-laws.
parents’ marriage license
Mildred Prady, 23, who fell in love
Confusing? Take
was mother’s birth cer-
as teenagers, are seen here on their
Cousin Delores Prady,
tificate. It turns out that
1927 Niagara Falls honeymoon.
for example, daughter
Mildred wasn’t really
of dad’s brother Jack
Mildred. She was Minnie.
and his wife, Sara.
Her mother, always recog-
That originally would
nized as one of the family
make Delores niece to dad and first cousin
Julias, actually was Jennie.
once-removed to mother prior to the mar-
I’ll just tuck this name stuff away, along
riage and some level of cousin to mother’s
with wondering why mother’s brother Eli
parents, right? So now does dad become
called himself Harry and why dad’s brother
cousin to Delores? Apparently not. As the
Henry called himself Eli.
pegs are moved about on some giant chart
Well, it’s all relative.

*

8 May 26 • 2016

upon this community as they have
taught us by their example, that each
life is precious, and we must continue
to provide for those in need, regardless
of age or financial ability to provide for
themselves.
May this community continue to be
blessed.

David M. Techner, founding president,
Jewish Hospice and Chaplaincy Network
West Bloomfield

Rabbi Krakoff Is
A Great Addition

What a wonderful addition Rabbi
Krakoff is to an already-great team
at Jewish Hospice and Chaplaincy
Network. Rabbi E.B. Freedman,
through his leadership, has helped to
build the JHCN into one of the most
vital institutions in our Jewish com-
munity.
The subject of death and dying is
a difficult one, and the chaplains of
JHCN provide a benefit to the fami-
lies of our community that most of
us cannot properly quantify. Until
you are in need of their help and sup-
port, they are probably not on your
radar screen. When you do engage
them, you wonder how you could
have made it through the challenges
without them.

Jeffrey M. Garden
West BLoomfield

Israel Walk A Hit
Despite Weather

The Walk for Israel was a major suc-
cess despite the cold, wind and snow
on Sunday, May 15. (See page 14.)
We thank AIPAC for its support
by bringing in Gil Hoffman, the
chief political correspondent and
analyst for the Jerusalem Post, for
his valuable insight. He who spoke
to a filled main sanctuary at Temple
Shir Shalom. Programming before
the Walk featured a free kosher
lunch; Israeli singing and dancing;
singing of the national anthem and
“Hatikvah,” led by Cantor Penny
Steyer, Cantor Rachel Gottlieb
Kalmowitz and Hazzan Daniel Gross;
prayers for Israel by Rabbis Michael
Moskowitz, Aaron Bergman and
Daniel Schwartz.
We appreciate Congresswoman
Brenda Lawrence and Sen. Gary
Peters for taking time to support the
Walk and speak for Israel. Both have

been regular participants for many
years.
Fortunately, the weather cleared for
us and Israel as the Walk filled both
sides of Orchard Lake Road with over
1,500 supporters of Israel proudly wav-
ing their American and Israeli flags.
The members of the Walk for Israel
team applaud and thank chairman
Andre Douville for his leadership,
drive and love for Israel that made
the Walk a success.
An additional thank you to the
clergy and board of directors of
Temple Shir Shalom for their generous
support by providing the use of the
temple facilities and staff for the Walk.

Ed Kohl
Walk for Israel Task Force member
West Bloomfield

Michigan Radio
Should Air Greeting

As a longtime enthusiastic supporter
of Michigan Radio, I would like to
register my consternation at the sta-
tion’s refusal to air Hannan and Lisa
Lis’ day sponsorship message in cel-
ebration of Yom HaAtzmaut (“Happy
Birthday, Israel?” May 19, page 16).
I think it was seriously mis-
guided of the station to label “Happy
Birthday, Israel!” as anything other
than a warm, personal greeting
marking a celebratory day. Nixing
the message as being “political” or
“controversial” makes no sense at
all — except to those who believe
that the modern State of Israel has no
right to exist.
The act of refusing to air the greet-
ing strikes me as being more political
and controversial than the greeting
itself. I urge the station management
to rethink this and offer the Lis fam-
ily the opportunity to run their greet-
ing as originally proposed.

Nancy F. Kaplan
West Bloomfield

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