metro »

Influential Rabbi

Norman Roman heads into retirement leaving a lasting imprint on generations.

David and Eileen Higer of Farmington
Hills joined TKA 23 years ago looking for a
smaller, intimate congregation. Though their
three sons are adults, they remain involved
in the congregation. David teaches in the
religious school and is a member of the tem-
ple board. Eileen is Sisterhood co-president.
When Eileen’s mother was dying, Higer
said Roman was a constant source of com-
fort for his entire family, including his sons,
whose main connection to Judaism and TKA
is through Roman.
“He knew my mother-in-law so well and
when he gave her eulogy, all his words were
his own insights into the kind of woman she
was,” Higer said. “He was so especially sup-
portive to my grown sons. To them, Rabbi
Roman is Temple Kol Ami.”

Stacy Gittleman | Contributing Writer

T

hough Rabbi Norman Roman is not
one to talk about himself, his guid-
ance as Temple Kol Ami’s rabbi for
the past 30 years has had a profound, unfor-
gettable influence on generations of Jews and
non-Jews alike in Metro Detroit.
Roman, the spiritual leader for the small
Reform congregation in West Bloomfield, an
accomplished musician, a community activ-
ist and adjunct instructor in religious studies
at the University of Detroit Mercy, will retire
on July 1.
As he approaches his final months on the
job, Roman has never been called upon so
much to officiate weddings. He is booked
solid all summer.
“I don’t know if it is because I am retir-
ing, but I am suddenly in high demand,”
said Roman as he took a phone call from a
former congregant in the temple’s library.
“This family has not been members here for
20 years, but his stepson wanted to make
sure that I would be available to perform his
wedding ceremony. What is not to feel great
about that?”
As he looks forward to his retirement
years, indeed Roman and the entire congre-
gation have many things to feel good about.
Roman’s career milestone coincides with
the same year that Temple Kol Ami cel-
ebrates its golden anniversary, with a gala
dinner scheduled for May.
Originally known simply as “the New
Temple,” TKA was founded by the late Rabbi
Ernst Conrad, his late wife, Nathalie, and
eight founding families in 1966. The con-
gregation first prayed at the Birmingham
Unitarian Church, where services were held
until March 1975, when the congregation
moved to its own building on Walnut Lake
Road in West Bloomfield.
In January of 1970, the New Temple
became Temple Kol Ami, meaning “Voice of
My People.” TKA under Conrad’s inspiration
gave its voice to many people throughout
the 1960s and ’70s as he and his congregants
were active in the national movements of the
day: civil and reproductive rights, women’s
equality as well as speaking out against the
Vietnam War.
Rabbi Roman took many cues and men-
toring from Conrad when he took the post as
the congregation’s rabbi in 1986. This includ-
ed a deep humility — praising the accom-
plishments of others rather than empha-
sizing those of his own. Above all was the
congregation’s continued pursuit of tzedakah
and social justice. Conrad, who escaped Nazi
Germany as a boy, died in 2009.

Rabbi Norman and
Lynne Roman with
their family

Kol Ami cantorial soloist Tiffany Green, Rabbi Norman Roman and Larry Kaufman sing
with Christopher Yarrow and his father, Peter Yarrow, of Peter, Paul and Mary.

LIVING JUDAISM
Under Roman’s 30 years of leadership, his
congregants continued to answer differ-
ent social issues of the time. The building
itself, with handicapped accessibility at the
entrance and in its smaller sanctuary, show-
ers installed in the lower level to offer hos-
pitality to the homeless and, most recently,
its certification in Leadership in Energy and
Environmental Design (LEED) for its 2008
Religious school wing (the first synagogue in
Michigan to attain this designation), speaks
volumes about the congregation’s commit-
ment to tikkun olam.
Ask Roman to list his own accomplish-
ments, he instead sings the praises of his con-
gregants, whose numbers have grown to more
than 330 families. The congregation formally

limited the size to 500 families in 1996.
He’ll also mention the weekly Torah
discussion class that’s been going on every
Shabbat morning for the last 30 years that’s
attended and taught by congregants of all
ages and backgrounds.
“Here we believe that every Jewish adult
has the capacity to teach about the Jewish
texts,” Roman said. “This is because each
brings to the texts their own experiences and
interpretations.”
He mentions the kids at TKA who have
grown to become rabbis, cantors and Jewish
educators. Some have made aliyah. Those
who have chosen secular career paths, he
believes, do so with a Jewish lens, includ-
ing those working on the revitalization of
Detroit.

ADAPTING TO CHANGE
Roman retires from an age when most live
in the same town their entire lives and where
generations of Jews remain committed to
a single religious institution. As the Jewish
demographic shifts and changes, Roman
believes that to remain viable, synagogues
must change to meet their needs.
One way TKA responded to the ever-
changing Jewish demographic was to
share its space. In 2011, the congregation
opened its doors to B’nai Israel Synagogue,
a Conservative congregation established in
Pontiac during the 1930s. Since then, though
they still hold their own separate religious
services, the two congregations have harmo-
niously shared the building’s sanctuaries and
social hall and come together occasionally
for social and religious programming.
Another adaptation to the changing times
was to be one of the nation’s first to use a vol-
untary pay-what-you-want dues structure.
Roman explained that trumah halev,
meaning “contributions of the heart,” takes
cues from an old European custom where
Jews would not belong to one synagogue
but rather a “kehilah” or a community. They
would attain their children’s Jewish education
from one synagogue, but would pray or seek
rabbinical counsel for life’s milestones from
others.
He said it is the best response to the needs
of our current congregants and also is a
response to younger Jews, who are moving
away from institutional loyalty.
Though there was in initial drop in rev-
enue, Roman said it is working out “better
than expected” in membership retention,
especially with members who experienced
economic hardships or those who followed
grown children to other congregations but
still wanted to keep ties with TKA.
“We had some people who were going

continued on page 26

24 April 28 • 2016