Now Takingl Party Tray Ordars for Yom Kippur Running from page 70 "We always make sure people are safe," says Chute, who has known of hospital- izations and imprisonments as the result of family abuse. "Women are at the most danger when they threaten to leave or actually leave Chute has seen some occasions of reso- lution when courts require that abusive men enter into treatment. She also has noted that most local women remain with their husbands because of concerns for family stability, financial security and safety from the most severe physical bru- tality anticipated if they leave. During Domestic Violence Awareness Month, Jewish Family Service will be distributing agency contact information on posters placed throughout the com- munity and stickers adhering to the front page of copies of the Jewish News. Defining Abuse Chute says that control is at the center of violent behavior and refers to the Power and Control Wheel, a diagram that calls attention to patterns of threats, intimida- tion and coercion. At first, control often seems to be expressed positively amid a very fast and deep connection that is hard to resist. Psychological abuse and physical abuse accelerate when the more positive con- trolling actions stop working. To help others, Susie E, who holds a professional position with Jewish Federation of Metropolitan Detroit, has begun talking about her decision to leave the home of her first husband and disap- pear with her children. The decision was made after hospital- ization to treat the most serious injuries she had suffered at the hands of her first husband. Custody issues brought her back to the area, where she divorced and expresses happiness with her second hus- band in a marriage now lasting beyond 13 years. "There's embarrassment, humiliation and shame as the abuse grows — with horrific names, a limited household budget and the punches that leave ter- rible bruises," says Susie F., who details the charming words and generous gifts that went along with dating the man she eventually fled. A lawyer, she was initially enamored of the attentive and attractive doctor who became her first husband, but looks back on his having no friends as a warning sign. Another danger signal, realized later, was his early insistence that she wear a beeper used for instant tracking. "There are so many issues associated with leaving, but I didn't want my kids to think our lives had been normal," says Susie F., whose former husband moved away after her remarriage. "We left with just the clothes on our backs, but my children and I moved on and are doing well because of family, friends and a strong attorney" Warning Signs Some of the issues described by Susie E exploded with a different conclusion in The Burning Bed, the Carlucci-produced film about Francine Hughes, a Michigan woman found not guilty of killing the husband she set on fire. As a battered woman herself, Carlucci understands the intensity of suffering that leads to death wishes toward the bat- terer. She oversaw those wishes become part of the second storyline in Run for Your Life. "I stayed in my first marriage because my husband threatened to kill me:' Carlucci says. "He told me that when I least expected it, he would blow my brains out, and I believed him:' Another Jewish man, a celebrated sitcom producer for whom Carlucci had been working, learned about her point of no return and agreed to a paid leave so she could hide for a time and then begin divorce proceedings. "I never believed my problem had any- thing to do with the fact that my husband was Jewish:' she says. "When I left him and began using my maiden name once more, people were astonished to find out I wasn't Jewish. I had planned seders and went along with other traditions." Carlucci, who describes a sound mar- riage with a second Jewish husband, will not give up on the subject she puts in the spotlight of films regardless of produc- tion hurdles. Making Run for Your Life presented some unusual difficulties because of Singer's hidden identity and insistence that communications occur only through a lawyer. Carlucci urges single women to watch for questionable and unusual — not necessarily violent — behavior while dating. She says that her first husband's lies before the marriage should have sug- gested that more serious troubles would emerge. "Domestic violence has been around for a very long time, and the public knows that," Carlucci says. "They need to be reminded:' ❑ Run for Your Life premieres at 8 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 4, on Lifetime. Check your local listings for rebroadcast times. For help dealing with domestic violence, contact Jewish Family Service at (248) 592-2300 or jfsdetroit.org . Offices are at 6555 W. Maple, in West Bloomfield, and 25900 Greenfield, Suite 405, in Oak Park. Q Fruit Basket with Party Tray Order ESTAURANT 248-683MW4 Nova Lox heese coons Tuna Salad Cucumbers Olives Egg Salad Tomatoes Bagels Sable Fish (Optional) 3258 Orchard Lake Road (Just North of Commerce Road) Sandwiches • Soups • Salads • Party and Shiva Trays & More... r Deli for 4 1 lb. of Meat, 1 Load of Bread. 1 Pint of Cole Slaw, 1 Quart of Soup, Russian Dressing, Pickles C7: 24i4" ? DELI ICI $24.50 + Tax One coupon per visit. Not valid with other offers. Expires 10/31/14 $4.00 OFF II II I I I I Purchase of $30 or more. I Dine In • Carry Out • Deli Trays I I 40)?4 11 L ELI =mini D One coupon per visit. Not valid with other offers. Expires 10/31/14 J 1871960 feING Hu4 •FINE CHINESE DINING A wonderful adventure in fine dining" — Danny Raskin Open 7 days a week for lunch and dinner Catering and carryout available Gift certificates 27925 Orchard Lake Rd., North of 12 Mile, Farmington Hills 248-489-2280 www.honghuafinedining.com 931 EXQUISITE CATERING IMPECCABLE SERVICE TRAY and SHIVA CATERING SHOWERS and WEDDINGS BAR and BAT MITZVAHS CORPORATE and PRIVATE DINNERS ON-SITE as well as OFF-PREMISE CATERING MILK& EPIC KOSHER CATERIN A DIVISION OF MILK 8, HONEY KOSHER-CHOLOV YISROEL Jewish Community Center GLATT KOSHER Adat Shalom Synagogue phone 1(855) 543 - EPIC fax 1(248) 785-0123 mil khoney@theepicu reang rou p .com www.theepicureangroup.com/kosher 1946680 October 2 • 2014 73