ROMA SPOSA BRIDAL COMMUNITY EVENING DESIGNER MAVEN Dear Debra SUMMER SALE THURSDAY, AUGUST 12 21 G ot a burning question? Need some advice? You can now submit a question anonymously at Red Thread's website, www.redthreadmagazine. comkontact/send question, and look for an answer in next month's edition. Houus ONLY FIRST COME, FIRST SERVE - 9 A.m. - 9 P.St. OSCAR DE LA RENTA CAROLINA HERRERA MARCHESA AMELIA CASABLANCA MONIQUE LHUILLIER BLISS BY MONIQUE LHUILLIER INES DI SANTO — Doesn't Know Her Left From Her Right NAIM KHAN Dear Doesn't Know, REEM ACRA RIVINI ROMONA KEVEZA LEGENDS BY ROMONA KEVEZA VERA WANG AND MANY MORE! 708 N. OLD WOODWARD AVE I I BIRMINGHAM MI1480091248.723.43001 ROMASPOSA.COM 1932020 o2Al2_c012€ PI2Ovac-r) Year-Round Swim Lessons! "LL"" 4 months - 12 years of age 4:1 student-to-teacher ratio 30-minute weekly lessons Faster Swimmers. Faster Results. Sum ump Start Dear Debra, I've attended wed- Debra Darvick dings on the wrong day, gone to events at the Terrace Gardens instead of the Gar- den Terrace, searched for a restaurant on Main Street East when it was located on Main Street West. Why does this keep happening to me, and what can I do to remember things better? I was struck by your dilemma of remembering, given that one of Juda- ism's bywords is zachor or remember. Why not take a page from your people and codify a way to remember what is important. Print a stack of "zachor" cards that have space for you to pencil in info for the following pre-set prompts: Where, what time, address, contact person, contact's cell, and what do I need to bring? Every night before you go to bed, review the next day's events and fill in the blanks on one of your pre- printed "zachor" cards. Put the card, and any needed items — yoga mat, wedding gift, etc. — with your car keys. The zachor cards must become your own personal bible. Don't leave home without one. This won't help you know right from left, but it will definitely help you get where you need to be, on time and with the right stuff. Dear Debra, My son took a brand new book out of Locations, times & details car, be found on our website: goldfishswimschool.com 1r 1 LIKE US on Facebook! 1921600 the library that has a tear-out poster in the back. He loves these posters and has them from other books in the series. He asked the librarian if he can have the poster, and she said no. Do I let him take it anyway?! know if it's not him, it's going to be the next kid. — To Tear or Not to Tear NOW OPEN! FREE Your NEW Neighborhood Pharmacy DELI ERY trankhn Discount Pharmacy Franklin Discount Pharmacy 20% OFF DISCOUNT ALL CASH • ALL NEW ilhhoi. PATIENTS PRESCRIPTIONS! 29113 Northwestern Hwy. Southfield 248.355.1910 OTC Medications I Blood Pressure Monitors I Diabetic Supplies I Immunizations I Medical Equipment - 28 August 20141 RED THREAD r ■ 1 I I 1.411:1 7- Dear Tear, Although the 10 Commandments were inscribed upon stone, the eighth — Thou shalt not steal — also applies to tear-out posters in a library book. Allow your son to remove the poster and you teach him that it's OK to steal, OK to ignore authority, and that his wants override the enjoyment of oth- ers. You didn't say if the posters your son already has were purchased or pilfered; I do hope it's the former. Permitting your son to steal using the rationale"if it's not him it will be the next kid"sets a terrible precedent. Your attitude assumes the worst of hu- manity (everyone's a thief) and green- lights future misdeeds. If the next kid is going to steal a candy bar, so can he. If the next kid is going to spread cyber hate, so can he. If your son has an allowance, have him use his savings to buy the book. Or give him some extra chores to earn the money to make the purchase.That way you teach him that he has the power within himself to achieve what he wants without resorting to crime. Dear Debra. My husband was out walking and saw our neighbor intoxicated and half-hang- ing out the open door of his car, which was parked at the curb on our street. He did not get involved or call the police because he said two teenaged girls were already there speaking to the man. We don't know these neighbors well, but from the weekend noise they seem to be big partiers and drinkers. This neighbor has had health problems in the past, and I hate to think that he could be out driv- ing drunk. He could kill someone. What can we do?— Neighborly Dear Neighborly, Would that your husband (the lone adult present in the scenario you de- scribe) had gotten involved and called the police. You say your neighbor has had health problems. You also assume they are big par- tiers and drinkers from their weekend noise. In this specific case, you have no way of knowing if he was indeed drunk, in pain from his illness or react- ing to medication.The police could have assessed the situation and acted accordingly. An upcoming Torah portion (Shoftim or Judges, Deuteronomy 19:15) instructs us that when it comes to giving testi- mony against someone, two or more witnesses are required. Neither you nor your husband would have made reli- able witnesses in this instance. When and if future opportunities arise, be friendly to your neighbors. Be watchful, not snoopy, when and if you see your neighbor driving in the neighborhood. Should this episode repeat itself, contact the authorities, remaining with your neighbor until they arrive. But unless and until that happens, you must give your neighbor the benefit of the doubt and maybe even some cookies next time you're baking. Debra Dark* shares her unique take on life, books and more at debradarvick.com. 1929830 www.redthreadmagazine.com