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Neck Pain? Specialized Manual Physical Therapy Can Help. For more information visit our website: www.ompt.com or call 248.353.1234 Three locations to serve you- Southfield, Troy and Commerce, now open OM PT ❑ SPECIALISTS ORTHOPEDIC MANUAL PHYSICAL THERAPY A higher level of therapy for proven results 11392030 , H.1 `, DON'T MISS THE HEALTH & FITNESS SECTION INSIDE THE JN THE LAST WEEK EVERY MONTH - Call 248.351.5107 for more information 40 June 19 • 2014 t's June ... finally! Nice weather, health and may mediate the difficul- important occasions and the ties associated with stress. Rituals whole summer ahead of us — encourage grittiness or the ability to including a steady stream of ritual persevere despite obstacles. moments! June is a month For parents or grand- of celebrations, and cel- parents, the ritual most ebrations involve rituals. identifiable to us in our Weddings, graduations, youth may have been the family dinner. It was likely vacations, the annual Father's Day barbeque; during those times that the these summer staples help family gathered to eat, talk shape the family identity. and share stories of the day. You may not think of For today's busy families, what you do as ritualistic, dinner may be on the run, but I bet that if you have so other rituals can be cre- young children in your ated that promote together- Ell en life, they do. They know ness, such as family story Ya s hi nsky time, game night or regular that each holiday you cel- Chu to ebrate has certain customs conversation about daily that are unique to you and events. your family. These are family rituals. New parents learn the importance To quote Amitai Etzione, the promi- of a ritualized bedtime routine, as nent Israeli-American sociologist, well as the creation of "date night:' "We are what we celebrate:' A mother of three children once told All families have rituals. For me of a storytelling sing-a-thon ritual her family had while in the carpool parents who have similar upbring- ings or family backgrounds, the line. She also said that the ritual establishment of family rituals may had to be slightly amended once the be an unconscious continuation of children were pre-teens, in order to intergenerational patterns. For other sustain their identity while avoiding their humiliation! families, creating new rituals may be a more difficult process. I have a computer file for holiday Whether through compromise, celebrations, which has shopping lists, menus, helpful hints from pre- acquiescence or determined creativ- ity, rituals create family identities. vious years and guest lists. I use my This is reflected brilliantly in the file for each holiday because our fam- central scene in Barry Levinson's ily ritual is to have the same specific movie Avalon, when Uncle Gabriel foods for each holiday every year. When my family gathers to Break the is indignant that his brother cut Fast following Yom Kippur, the menu the turkey before he arrives for Thanksgiving dinner. The breaking is a given. Much of the food that I of this traditional ritual causes a per- serve at that meal is not served at manent family rift and changes the any other time during the year. I have family forever. suggested something new and differ- Sometimes, rituals are socially ent to my kids and grandkids, and recognized acts that have prescribed they are adamant about wanting the same menu. meanings. We associate the engage- ment of two people to be married I learned that more important with the giving of a ring. Amidst than something new and delicious is something old and familiar. It is the ever-evolving changes in the traditional family structure, families comfort, tradition, family. It is us. today often create new rituals to vali- The guest list changes, the family date their own experience. members change, but the menu is For example, single parents cre- the menu. It is a constant. We can all ate rituals with their children that count on it, and we do. might be different than their coupled What are your family rituals? How counterparts. In any case, rituals give were they created? How do you honor family members a sense of security them? and stability, which serve as depend- Ellen Yashinsky Chute is the chief able supports when there might be community outreach officer at Jewish chaos in other areas. Research tells Family Service of Metropolitan Detroit. us that this is crucial to our mental