metro Learning To Love My grandmother's gift to her next generations. I n the final days of her life, as my grandmother writhed in pain from the lymphoma that had rav- ished her body, she was able to take in love more than at any other time in her life. Her body was dying, but her soul was just begin- ning its journey, finally freed by knowing, with absolute certainty, that she was loved. My grandmother lost her mother when she was 11. She explained to me, "There was no one to teach me how to love. There was no one there when I came home from school to say, 'How was your day?' or even, 'Do you have any homework today?' No one ever said, 'I love you. In 1970, the year I was born, my grandmother suddenly found herself a widow. She was 50 and living alone for the first time in her life. She described the shock to me: "I didn't even know how to write a check. There I was all alone, and I had to take care of myself." Nine years later, her daughter (my mother) decided to go back to school. She was determined to go to work, use her skills and earn her own money. She needed this like she needed oxygen. Without her own work and her own money, she was suffocating. It was the extraordinary time when the Women's Rights move- ment, birth control pill and two Jewish women named Betty Friedan and Gloria Steinem were waking up our mothers. It was the time when women all over our country were fighting for a seat, a voice, the protection of their bodies and the capacity to earn their own way. They were equally fighting to love themselves. It was not necessarily FOR EL CAMP MONDAY BEGINS JUNE 16TH - FRIDAY 8AM - 5PM LATCHKEY AVAILABLE wee,o,/, g4enze4/eatiai:* - FUN ENVIRONMENT EDUCATIONAL ACTIVITIES FITNESS DANCE AND MORE MOTOR CITY DANCE FACTORY 29429 SOUTHFIELD ROAD SOUTHFIELD, MI 48076 248.905.5678 For details and camp costs visit our website at www.motorcitydancefactory.com IF YOU HAVE RELAPSING MS, YOU'RE INVITED. ONE DIFFERENCE. The One Day for Every Day event for people with relapsing MS and their care partners. - SATURDAY, MAY 17, 2014 - Get information from MS experts, learn about an oral treatment option, and connect with the community. Breakfast and lunch will be served. Free parking is available, We hope you'll join us. • ■•■■ • • MS EXPERT PANEL: A neurologist, people living with MS, and others will discuss MS •••• and a treatment option, and answer questions - so bring yours. Featuring: Howard S. Rossman, D.O., FACN, Medical Director, KIND. Multiple Sclerosis Center, Michigan Institute for Neurological Disorders Daniel S. Bandari, MD, MS, Director, Multiple Sclerosis Center of California & Research Group, Hoag Neurosciences Institute WORKSHOPS: Join 1 of 3 different sessions led by experts: Effectively Communicate Your MS Story Make Technology Work for You MS and Your Relationships MS HEALTH FAIR: Organizations, companies, and support groups devoted to people living with MS will be on hand to talk, share, and help. ad FOR MORE INFORMATION AND TO REGISTER, GO TO 1day4everyday.com OR CALL 1-866-703-6923 TODAY! 1910580 May8•2014 ❑ Congregation Shir Tikvah in Troy will hold two women's events in May. From 7-8:30 p.m. on May 10, Kolton will lead an evening of healing, empowerment and connection. Free, but reservations are required. At 1 p.m. on May 31, Grammy-winners Karen Taylor Good and Stowe Daily Shockey will lead a heart-opening women's musical workshop. Cost is $15 for members; $20 for non-members. For both, go to www.shirtikvah.org . Adoba Hotel 600 Town Center Drive, Dearborn, Ml 48126 SATURDAY, MAY 17, 2014 11:00 AM - 2:00 PM 18 vocalized that way on the picket line, but the yearning and the need was no less urgent then the demand for suffrage. It has taken generations of women coming into their own to learn how to love themselves. I grew up watching my grandmother and mother come into their own dur- ing the feminist revolu- tion. They continued to wear bras and cook dinner. But things were changing inside of them. The psychic blueprint of who they were as women was changing rapidly. They grew out of dependency and found independence delicious and exhilarating. And they were learning how to love themselves. They were coming alive. In my family, I am the third gen- eration of women learning to love themselves. I am the bridge between my grandmother, my mother and my daughter, Maya, who completes the circle, carrying her middle name, Jeanette, after her great-grandmoth- er into the fourth generation. Eighteen years ago, my grand- mother took her final breath. Nine of us surrounded her in a circle, hold- ing hands, singing to her in Hebrew and Yiddish. She loved us into the world, and we loved her out of it. And in between, she learned the hardest and most important lesson any person can ever learn in her lifetime — she learned how to love herself. This love emancipated her, allowing her the capacity to fully experience the depth and breadth of how much we, her family, loved her. At the end of her life, she claimed her birthright: to love and be loved. She died wrapped in the arms of her children and grandchildren, ready to fly like Ezekiel himself on a golden chariot.