>> mentsh of the month
'a in Forward
Academic excellence
and affordability.
Volunteer Nancy Handleman keeps coming
to Fleischman after mother's death.
Some things are simply
Stacy Gittleman
I Special to the Jewish News
better together.
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24 January 16 • 2014
or more than 40 sum-
mers, Nancy Handleman
of West Bloomfield and
her mother, Yetta Davidson, had
a standing getaway weekend to
the Stratford Festival in Ontario.
Several years ago, Handleman
noticed a decline in her mother's
faculties.
Like so many of her genera-
tion, that began her journey to
becoming a caregiver to a parent
with dementia, and then a devot- Volunteer Nancy Handleman shows off her
knitting project to Dolores Wulff, who lives at
ed visitor and volunteer at the
Fleischman Residence/Blumberg Fleischman.
Plaza in West Bloomfield.
During that summer weekend,
and her mother received. She shows off
Handleman noticed in the hotel room
her latest knitting project or brings a
that her mother, a retired Southfield
book to read aloud. Once a month, she
public school teacher widowed for
will bake with the residents. No matter
decades, no longer knew how to dress
their physical abilities, Handleman said
herself. Handleman made the difficult
all enjoy being together to bake.
realization that Davidson's dementia
"Sometimes residents no longer have
had progressed to the point where liv-
the strength to stand and mix ingredi-
ing independently was not an option.
ents. But even if they are sitting in their
Through weekly support groups held
wheelchairs, they are stimulated and
at Fleischman on Thursday afternoons
involved in the process of baking."
at 2 p.m., Handleman, an English
Most of all, Handleman wants to pro-
instructor at Schoolcraft College in
vide companionship to the residents,
many who have grown children who
Livonia, found comfort as other care-
givers shared their journeys and the
live out of town.
strength to move her mother into an
"It makes a big difference when the
assisted living apartment.
residents have someone come by to say
"When you have a parent with
hello, to compliment them on how they
dementia, you have to come to the real-
look, to talk about the latest movies.
ization that it's not going to get better;
Even if they can't verbally respond, they
Handleman said. "But there are places
love the sound of conversation:'
to go that will provide enough stimu-
Carol Rosenberg, director of the
lation to slow down the progression,
Jewish Senior Life Foundation, said she
where your loved ones will be treated
greatly appreciates Handleman's contin-
with patience and dignity?'
ued dedication in visiting the residents.
Davidson lived at Fleischman for
"When many lose their loved ones,
almost two years. Soon, Handleman
they move on?' Rosenberg said. "But not
noticed her mom had struck up a
Nancy. She came and continued to sit
special friendship with one of the
and visit with our residents. She is the
male residents. To help this budding
real thing and volunteers straight from
romance, Handleman planned weekly
her heart?'
picnic dates, complete with a checkered
Handleman and her husband have
tablecloth, sandwiches and chips.
three grown children who live in New
its my mom's and her partner's
York, Chicago and California. With no
children in town, Handleman knows
dementia progressed, they became less
verbal but they still held hands. But
she wants an assisted living lifestyle in
when I visited them with a picnic lunch her later years.
complete with a [Bake Station] cake and
"I don't want to be isolated. I tell my
flowers, you'd think they won the jack-
kids, when I am ready, I'll be ready to
pot by the happy look on their faces?'
live in an assisted living apartment?'
When Davidson passed away last
Contact Stacy Gittleman at www.
May, Fleischman residents feared that
stacylynngittleman.com to nominate
Handleman would stop visiting. Yet
someone you know for Mentsh of the Month,
each week, Handleman continues to
which runs every third week of the month.
"pay forward" the love and support she
F
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