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Lexiphiles, Arise. Punsters, Beware.
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ver the years, I have heard from many people
who share my love of and for words. It is not only
the colorful or unusual that draw interest. As a
speaker of English, I am constantly amused by the many
uses to which we can put the same word and by the often-
amusing results of words being misused or played on
for humor. (The pun, as many of you know, is one of my
favorite studies.)
On a regular basis, I hear from friends who
are championing my cause and finding delightful
examples of word play on the Internet. They share
them with me, and now I would like to share some
of them with you.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.
The professor discovered that her theory of earth-
quakes was on shaky ground.
The batteries were given out free of charge.
A dentist and manicurist got married. They
fought tooth and nail.
Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I
will show you A-flat miner.
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
The guy who fell into the upholstery machine was fully
JN CONTENTS
recovered.
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in
the end.
Acupuncture is a jab well done.
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit
me.
A will is a dead giveaway.
A chicken crossing the road is poultry in
motion.
He broke into song because he could not find
the key.
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-
know basis.
A backward poet writes inverse.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you can get
repossessed.
Police were called to a day care center where a
3-year-old was resisting a rest.
When a clock is hungry, it goes back four sec-
onds.
Though our language may seem hard to mas-
ter, just keep in mind the fun that can be had if
you decide to be like an iceberg and go with the floe.
❑
theJEWISHNEWS.com
Nov. 28-Dec. 5, 2013 I 25 Kislev-1 Tevet 5774 I Vol. CXLIV, No. 17
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Thanksgiving: Thursday, Nov. 28
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