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The Trouble With Texting
I
used to be a huge fan of texting. I'd listen to people com-
plain how normal communication is going out the window,
how politeness is becoming obsolete and how conversa-
tions are being reduced to a bunch of meaningless, emotion-
less abbreviated letters on a phone. But I'd sing the praises of
convenience — whenever I wanted a quick yes or
no, I'd just jab at my phone for a few seconds and
have the answer just as fast.
There's none of those 'Hi, how are you?' pleasant-
ries that can seem like an annoying waste of time
when all you really want is your answer. What a time
saver, what convenience!
But recently, I've heard about/experienced some
things that made me wonder if texting is really as
wonderful as it seems at first.
My first episode happened when I messaged my
sister-in-law, asking if I could take her out for her
birthday. She wrote back yes and I spent the next
hour wondering what special activity we could do
together. Suddenly, a thought occurred to me. Would
my other sister-in-law be offended if I didn't invite her? I
quickly texted the birthday girl again asking if we should invite
her sister ... and accidently sent it to the very sister-in-law I
was asking about. Oops!
Story #2: When my brother's wife was in labor with their
first child in Australia, he told me he'd text me updates so I
could forward them to my other siblings in the United States.
That way, no one would be nudging him, yet we'd all feel
included. As the hours progressed, he messaged when he
could: "on way to the hospital" "just got epidural" "Dr says
soon!!!" "omg!!! Crowning!!!" and other such texts until finally:
"IT'S A GIRL!!"
As soon as I got the texts, as agreed, I'd forward them on to
my sisters Brocha and Chana. Brocha called me back each time
and we squealed with excitement ... but at one point, I real-
ized I hadn't heard from Chana all day. Finally I text messaged
her: "you there? You ok?" and got a message back immedi-
ately: "STOP MESSAGING ME!" What on Earth?
JN CONTENTS
I immediately called her on her house phone and discovered
that I'd programmed her new cell phone in incorrectly and
had been sending all those updates to a random stranger, who
found out about our new niece even before Aunt Chana did!
But one story not only takes the cake, it takes the whole des-
sert buffet.
On a recent trip to my hometown, I was
shmoozing with a good friend and she told me this
story: She was having a terrible argument with her
husband. Sometimes it's worse not to finish the
argument because both parties are left hanging,
still left with words unsaid. My friend, who was
seething, wanted to get a whole load of things off
her chest. She sat down and started punching it
all into her phone. Most of the text was filled with
no-no's like "you never ..., "you always ...", "you
absolute ..." and other such gems.
A few minutes later, feeling slightly better,
she pressed send. Suddenly, she realized she'd
accidently sent it to her father-in-law — not her
husband. As soon as she realized, she called her father-in-law
to apologize and to make sure he knew that text bashing wasn't
meant for him.
Lucky for her, he is a very understanding, sympathetic
person. He told her, "Every couple has their ups and downs.
Don't worry; this, too, shall pass. You're both doing an
excellent job — keep up the good work"
Still, she couldn't look at him for months and, to this day,
cringes with embarrassment whenever she thinks of that
episode.
These true anecdotes are about the wrong people getting
the right message. But there are just as many stories of texts
going to the right people — but them getting the wrong
message. Amid all the flurries of apologies, explanations and
interpretations, I'm beginning to think it's quite odd to always
call texting a "convenience" and a "time-saver:'
❑
Roche) Burstyn lives in Southfield.
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