metro >> on the cover
Cross-Border
Bliss
Wedding a Windsorite
can be "the best
of both worlds."
Pinkas Jarcaig, third from the left, stands next to his wife,
Shirley, in a portrait with their children and grandchildren.
Ronelle Grier I Contributing Writer
CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1
enjoyed living there; moving wasn't easy."
Sheldon and Bethe Jarcaig have lived in Windsor
— brides and grooms from opposite sides of the
since 1981, raising three daughters, developing
border who bridged cultural and geographical gaps
respective careers and serving the Jewish communi-
to come together and raise families.
ty in various volunteer capacities. Bethe, who lived
Some of these couples, including Bethe and
in Southfield when she met her future husband,
Sheldon Jarcaig of Windsor, met through BBYO
remembers her first trip to the grocery store as a
during a time when there was frequent interaction
new wife and Canadian resident.
between chapters in both countries. Other couples,
"It took me three hours to find everything; my
such as Shirley and Pinkas Jarcaig (Sheldon's broth-
husband finally came looking for me," she said.
er) of Oak Park, were introduced
Bethe works for a customs
brokerage company in Windsor;
by mutual friends.
Among Many Detroit-
Like many young people in
Sheldon, vice-president of
Windsor Marriages
the 1970-80s, the Jarcaigs had
a Detroit-based scrap metal
no trepidation about meeting
company, commutes across the
• Dr. Robert and Elaine
prospective partners from across
border. "We haven't had a legal
Robins, West Bloomfield
the border, even if it meant an
holiday together in 30 years:' she
• Ann and Leonard Baruch,
eventual move to one side or
said, "but this is a great place
West Bloomfield
to raise a family, [with] a little
the other. These liaisons were
• Raymond and Nancy
common, due in part to the
slower pace."
Silverman, West Bloomfield
dwindling Jewish population in
Bethe and Sheldon have held
• Ellen and Bryan Hochberg,
Windsor, the close proximity of
various positions within local
Farmington Hills
the two communities and the rel-
Jewish organizations: She is cur-
• Noah and Julie Zuckerman
ative ease of crossing the border.
rently president of the Windsor
Tepperman, Windsor
Pinkas Jarcaig, who grew up
Jewish National Fund (JNF); he is
• Ruth and the late Irwin
in Windsor, met Shirley through
a past JNF president and current
Kahn, Bloomfield Hills
her Oak Park neighbors, former
Federation board member. They
• Beverly and the late Morris
Windsorites who had known
travel to Metro Detroit often to
Baker, Bloomfield Hills
Pinkas' parents. The Jarcaigs
see extended family members on
lived in Windsor for 25 years,
both sides.
where they raised two sons and a daughter. Shirley
"It's really the best of both worlds:' said Bethe,
"living in a small town and having family in subur-
was enthusiastic about moving to Canada; the
Jewish community was warm and friendly, and the
ban Detroit?'
Vietnam War situation also made Canadian resi-
dency more appealing.
Benefits To Both Cities
Another "mixed" couple is Ian and Shelley Alexis of
"I was glad my husband wouldn't have to worry
about the draft:' she said.
West Bloomfield, who recently celebrated their 25th
wedding anniversary. Ian, who grew up in Windsor,
When the couple decided to give their children
a Jewish education, there was no viable option in
already knew several Metro Detroiters through his
involvement with BBYO. He met Shelley, who lived
Windsor, so they commuted to Akiva Hebrew Day
School in Southfield, carpooling with other families
in Southfield, through a Windsor friend who hap-
in the same situation.
pened to be dating Shelley's first cousin.
In 1995, the Jarcaigs moved to Oak Park. The
"Some of my closest peers were living in Toronto
Windsor Jewish community was shrinking, and the
and Montreal, and the number of available Jewish
family had become more observant, making it dif-
women in Windsor was dwindling," he said.
ficult to live without local resources for kosher food
After a wedding at Congregation Shaarey Zedek
and other items.
in Southfield, the couple set up housekeeping in
"There was no kosher bakery or butcher shop:'
Windsor, where Ian's business was based. There they
Shirley said. "It became harder to get our needs
met, but it was a very nice community and we
Cross-Border on page 10
8
August 1 • 2013
Ian and Shelley Alexis flank daughters Blair and Lindsay.
Ari and Pam Freed in Italy with their sons Evan and Derek
Dan and Susan Orman with their sons Blake and Alexander