metro

Giant Jewish Wedding

Under a huge chuppah, 15 couples — friends from former Soviet Union — renew vows.

Karen Schultz Tarnopol

I Contributing Writer

L

iving in gratitude, they say, is
the secret to a fulfilling life. An
extraordinary group of lifelong
friends originating from Lvov and
Odessa, Ukraine, learned this lesson long
ago.
This remarkable group of 40 friends,
20 couples, met in their teens, and even-
tually married while still living in the
former Soviet country. Sadly, not one of
these couples had the traditional Jewish
wedding they longed for. Having a Jewish
wedding was forbidden.
"We couldn't practice our religion. We
didn't have synagogues. We were prison-
ers, and we had to assimilate," Tamara
Friedman of Bloomfield Hills explains.
Yanna Vaskel of Los Angeles, Calif.,
adds, "My grandfather, when I got mar-
ried, told me that it was the saddest day
of his life that his first granddaughter
couldn't be married under a chuppah.
He wanted to have the wedding under-
ground, but he was so afraid. He didn't
come to my wedding because it wasn't a
traditional Jewish wedding."
They all eventually left Russia and
started their families in Michigan, New
York, Illinois, California, Toronto and
Florida.
In spite of their distance, this group
stuck together and cultivated a unique
bond and love for one another. They
reunite every Fourth of July in Michigan
for what they fondly call their "birthright
trip:' and they often arrange to travel
together on at least one or two other

More than 45 years of everlasting commitment to love and friendship is still going strong.

occasions throughout the year.
With so much history, Vaskel says, "We
can talk for hours and never get bored.
Every time we meet we become young
again; we become teenagers again."
They are all parents and grandparents
and have plenty to celebrate together.
They attend each other's simchahs and

Hands up: Love, happiness and beauty are in the air.

16 July 25 • 2013

are there for one another during the not
so good times, too.
"Every couple is so special. Every per-
son has the most incredible personality.
The way we click is unusual because we
always come from the expression of love
— it's incredible. If we could be together
all the time it would be perfect a situa-
tion. We are so treasured to be together:'
Friedman says.
This year was a particularly special
time for this tightknit group. Fifteen of
the 20 couples came together to renew
their vows and to have that traditional
Jewish wedding together. The five couples
that could not make it physically to the
wedding attended by Skype.
The wedding was held at the Royal
Park Hotel in Rochester on July 6 and was
officiated by Cantor Michael Smolash of
Temple Israel in West Bloomfield.
A chuppah was designed specifically to
fit all 15 couples underneath it. The sym-
bolism behind the chuppah, according to
Bella Malin of Chicago, was "that it was
not just about our commitment to our
spouses; it was about our commitment
to our friendship of 50 years, too. These
friendships give a lot to us. They help us

to stay young and beautiful because we
are gentle with each other and we support
each other. We share so much together:'
Each couple brought a kiddush cup to
the wedding that was significant to them,
along with a keepsake from their parents.
They had a ketubah for each couple, chal-
lah and music from the Fiddler on the
Roof.
It was a night to remember, like so
many they share together. They finally
had the wedding they dreamed of — a
traditional Jewish wedding.
With such devotion to each other and
to their families, it's interesting to note
that not one of these 20 couples has been
divorced. The bunch has defied the odds.
So aside from gratitude, what is the secret
to their happily ever after?
"A husband's pampering;' Vaskel says,
"and it was a marriage made from love.
It was love at first sight:' She and her
husband, Ilysha, have been married for
43 years.
Friedman adds, "When we were kids
we really fell madly in love with each
other. When I got married, I didn't even
have a ring. My husband, Jenia, is the
most wonderful guy. Like everybody here,