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New book aids readers in how to be
a friend not just in good times but in
bad times as well.
Suzanne Chessler
I Contributing Writer
L
etty Cottin Pogrebin, a found-
ing editor of Ms. Magazine
and continuing writer, made
extensive weekend plans for cel-
ebrating her 74th birthday this June.
Her schedule included Shabbat
dinner with friends, Saturday
lunch in the home of other friends,
Saturday dinner with her husband
(attorney Bert Pogrebin) at a candle-
lit restaurant and a Sunday get-
together to include a friend with the
same birthday.
The activities, signaling a circle of
many close connections, felt particu-
larly joyous coming after a period of
sad times as she coped with breast
cancer, an experience that left her
pondering illness and relationships.
Pogrebin has turned her thoughts
and encounters into a book she
hopes will benefit both those dealing
with the impact of various condi-
tions and those wanting to help ease
the suffering.
In the fall, she will be in Michigan
1
Letty Cottin Pogrebin
for the Detroit Jewish Book Fair
to discuss How to Be a Friend to a
Friend Who's Sick (PublicAffairs;
$24.99). The subject matter is based
on interviews with some 80 fellow
patients at Memorial Sloan-Kettering
Cancer Center in New York City.
"The way that people reacted to
me when I was first diagnosed is
what inspired this book, and I think
the takeaway is very practical and
rooted in reality," Pogrebin says in a
phone conversation from New York.
"Probably the most important
message of the book is for friends to
be honest, treat people in terms of
what they really need and help them
normalize.
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LOX OR SABLE FOR TWO
INCLUDES
I FRESH FRUIT AND 2
COFFEES
Breakfasts, Lunches or Dinners.
▪ r
LB. of Sable $26.99
LB. of LOX $14.99
LB. of Chopped LOX $6.99
Lb. kippered salmon $12.99
SPECIAL
FOR TWO
With The Purchase of Two Adult
Knowing What To Say
33210 W. 14 Mile Rd
In Simsbury Plaza, just east of Farmington Rd.
West Bloomfield
A Better Death
Erica Brown, 46, admits to fears of
death, but she feels prepared for
an easier end-of-life experience
than she might have anticipated in
earlier years.
That sentiment has to do with
research for her eighth book,
Happier Endings: A Meditation on
Life and Death (Simon & Schuster;
$26). The text explores ways that
families have coped with the pass-
ing away of loved ones.
Brown, scholar-in-residence for
the Jewish Federation of Greater
Washington, usually focuses on
Jewish issues but expanded her
outlook to other cultures for this
subject.
"It was eye-opening to me as
a person of faith to also embrace
the faith traditions around death
in other communities," Brown
explains during a recent phone
conversation from Maryland.
"It's not something we can do
Erica Brown
right; it's something that we can
do better. We need to let everyone
be a teacher in that process."
Brown's interest in the subject
came from the death of a 40-year-
old cousin.
"I come from a small family, and
the death of a cousin was rather
momentous," says Brown, who has
lectured in Michigan, where she
also has appeared at the Jewish
Book Fair.
"In the mystery of this young
person dying, it was such an inti-
mate experience for me that it